Taste of Time

Golden Goodness

2012-01-20T17:38:00.006+08:00

Its almost Chinese New year..And I haven't baked any new year goodies for the family. Each year, this proves to be such a challenge now. With the studio to managed, and the store I have to baby sit too. Though Benny runs the store now. There are still many 'grey' areas I need to look into and watch over. Its not an overnight hand over of duties. Despite his many many years of retail experience, running a baking supplies shop takes much practice and basic know-how.

There are so many things I wanted to share online but I just couldn't find the time. The moment I step into the studio, there is always work that needs attention.

Like this jelly I wanted to make..seems to take forever too. But I managed to find some time yesterday, just an hour is all I need. And I did this, purely just to show case 2 products I sell in my store.

1. The ingot plastic packaging case
2. Frozen Kumquats from CapFruit France

I showed the final end product of my recipe at Facebook. And promised everyone a recipe to follow. So I decided to post it here at my blog. Well, basically, you can use any mold you have at home for this. I just wanted to show off stuff I have.

The jelly was mildly sweet because I didn't put that much sugar in it. Except that I use Golden syrup for it. The taste and flavor of the kumquat was evident. It was delicious..smooth, cold, and has that zesty taste. I use the balance to pour into a larger pineapple mould. I would serve this on Reunion dinner..

This year, our dinner will be cooked by me..and served in our new studio.

Here's to all a Very Happy and Prosperity Year of the Dragon!!

Golden Kumquat Jelly
Recipe by Gina Choong

Ingredients
200g golden kumquat(Frozen)
1 packet of Agar Q jelly powder(colourless/white)
2 tbsp condensed milk
100ml golden syrup(if not, go for maple syrup or honey)
800ml water

Method:
1. Defroze kumquats in tap water, cut into half. And squeeze out all the seeds. Look at my pictures for reference.
2. Puree the kumquats till soft and mashy.

3. Add pureed fruits, and the rest of the ingredients into a sauce pot to cook till its sticky and thick.
4. Leave it off the stove to cool slightly. How to know if its cool enough? just dip a spoon into it and tap on your tongue..! or at least this is how I always test if its cool enough. Or else, just leave it aside for about 10 mins.
5. If you use the plastic case I have, you need to invert it in a deep bowl. By itself, the mould cannot stand properly.
6. Pour the liquid into the mould and leave the whole bowl into the fridge to set. This may take 1 to 2 hours.
7. Put the base(gold base) over the top of the case, flip over...voila! Done!

This is how the plastic casing looks like..! You can only find this at our store at Kallang Bahru. Costs $0.80 per set(top and bottom)

So many Things...

2012-01-13T09:24:00.005+08:00

Things , sung by Dean Martin and Nancy Sinatra

I seemed to have disappeared. Its just that I have so many things to do. To plan, to decide. For home, for work, for the studio. Today is Friday, the 13th. Not the nicest date if you want to think of all the nice things or the luckiest things..But for me, its the best today.

Because Mediacorp's Channel 8 will be featuring my store and my studio tonight. On a program called HDB Tai Tai. At 8:30pm tonight. If you are in Singapore and I guess in Asia too, you can catch this on xinmsn.com.

They came to film last October 2011. And told me just before airing it, they will let me know the date. Here are some photos we took when they came to do the filming.

They also ask me to bake cupcakes and decorate it for filming. I did so many things and my highlight was to feature our Mahjong Tiles chocolate mould and how I use it to make chocolates and painted the chinese tile. In my haste, I forgot to put it on the table for them..

They will do a voice over so it was like a silent movie when they came to film.

These are made for filming and of course its also edible! I packed these up into boxes and the crew took it with them for tea later.

And my chocolate mahjong tiles...that didn't make it to program!! sighz...

Here is the address to my shop and studio

Kitchen Capers
Block 71 #01-531F Kallang Bahru Singapore 330071
Tel : +65 6392 0159

Kitchen Capers Baking Studio
Block 71 #01-531E Kallang Bahru Singapore 330071
Tel : +65 6392 0159

I think of you all the time...

2011-12-08T08:45:00.004+08:00

I Wish you Love, sung by Lisa Ono

I have been extremely busy with work, with my classes and with family, with the people I love. Ever since Benny quit his day job to work with me in the business, I became even more busy than ever. Maybe because I was able to do all the things I wanted to do for the business now.

But having him by my side meant we saw each other day in day out. We do things together. We have every meals together. And anywhere I wanna go, he said he will drive me there. He told his friend "I am like having honeymoon everyday"..and I told my friends that I am going on a date every day whenever I go to work.

There were things I wanted to do with him when we first got married. When we first met, and loved. But never in my wildest dreams was to have him by my side. Benny was a go-getter, strong headed. I was a risk-taker, bull headed(most of the times!). And I think we couldn't work together.

He reminded me so many times why he took out all his savings to start the shop. It was for him to retire from working for others and he still thinks we can work together. With his vast retail merchandising experience and with my risk taking marketing skills, my teaching skills and I seems to-know-everything skills, he said we could ROCK this part of the world.

In the first month, we argue alot. In fact every other day. I have struggled for 3 years alone in the business. He just joined. I don't care how many donkey years he had in retailing, but I had to have my own way of doing things and he has his too. One big fight lead us to think about us working for the good of the business and our love for each other.

And then, i took a step back. Turn to God and ask Him to show me and to teach me where I have gone wrong.

And God reminded me of my place in his life. That I was always the supporting figure in his life. Someone who stood in the background. Someone who always there when he needed help, when he needed love and attention. And there, I cried to God...

I went to Benny and I cried. And I said SORRY. And we shouldn't fight each other. But we should learn to re-live our life together again. As we need to work together every day. We should take a step back each time we need to raise our voices at each other.

Then Benny told me that at the height of his anger at that moment, he said things he shouldn't have. In turn, he need to go to God and ask for forgiveness too. And God showed him that the Key ingredient to a successful and happy marriage is to be able to fight and argue and still find love in it.

And since that fateful day we fought, we never looked back. Whenever I felt upset of the things he did, I would tell him there and then. And not bottled up inside all the time and let it grow and make a monster out of me. And if he wants things done his way, he learn to say "I need your advice, what do you think?"

and in turn, I became more mellow, more humble ..

They say that Love is a 2 way street...I believe it so. Because if you give and never get, you stop giving. Benny and I have been married for 23 years. In these 23 years there were always moments of love, moments of sadness, moments of anger. The good stuff we keep..the bad stuff we also keep but we never let it go. And that builds up over the years. We just think its okay to just cover it up like a carpet over dust.

But God told us to let it go, let it out. And He made us do that when we worked together.

So now, our business is booming. People ask us the secret of our success..how in 3 years we make good money and started a studio. The answer is LOVE...

So if the business fail, it meant that our love for each other has died. So until then, the business continues to grow and prosper as the love we have for each other grew stronger each day.

And then now, I wish you love...all of you. In your life with your better half. Its when you give and take, the things and people around you prosper. As God has intented it to be.

Peace be with you...

Fit for a King

2011-11-16T09:39:00.001+08:00

Something different for a change as hubby celebrates his birthday last week. He wanted something different than just noodle soup with an egg. *

*Traditionally, a chinese birthday is a simple fare. No cakes, no parties. Just noodles swimming in a rich chicken stock, served with a big chicken drumstick on the side, and a whole egg (semi-cooked). Often served to the birthday man/woman at the break of dawn. To symbolise the coming of age and a year of good things (health, prosperity and happiness). In the past, people are really poor so chickens are like delicacy and eggs are just as expensive as it gets. So to be served with a chicken drumstick, an egg means for one day in a year, you are like an Emperor who is waited upon by his lower subjects and treated like an Emperor savouring an Imperial meal.

But for my Emperor at home, he is waited upon 365 days in a year. Love knows no boundaries.

Ingredients for beef and marinate for 3 to 4 hours
500g Short Rib Beef(sliced thinly)
1 white onion, sliced
40ml worcestershire sauce
3 tbsp coarsely ground black pepper
2 tbsp coarse sugar grains
1 egg white

35g butter(salted)

Sauce
1 litre beef stock
3 tbsp cornstarch mix with 2 tbsp water to be use as thickener

Blanch and drain the following :
300g bean sprouts
300g chye sim

Ingredients to fry noodles
1kg hor fun(flat noodles)
1 clove garlic, minced
2 tbsp dark soya sauce
3 tbsp cooking oil

Method
1. Heat up wok and add oil, to saute the garlic minced.
2. Add noodles to fry and add dark soya sauce to stir fry over high heat for 5 to 8 mins. Till the noodles are coated with the sauce and turns from white to dark coloured.
3. Dish out and serve in a casserole, set aside.
4. Wash and clean wok and heat up again.
5. Add butter to wok to heat, melt. Add beef and marinates to stir fry over high heat for 3 mins. Dish out beef and continue to cook the sauce. Add beef stock into it to boil.
6. Add thickener to thicken it. Once it thickens, turn off heat.

To serve
Serve generous portions of noodles on a plate.
Add beansprouts, chye sim on the side.
Add a couple of slices of beef on top.
Pour piping hot sauce over it.

Enjoy!

Wait for me...

2011-10-02T16:32:00.004+08:00

Because He Lives (Christian Hymn)

How long do one grieve over the loss of some one dear to them? A week, a month or many years? I really don't know. My best friend, my mentor, my teacher has passed away recently. She is none other than Sister Seok Buay, the one and only person I started Kitchen Capers for. I think you must read for so long that I often talked about Seok Buay and about Kitchen Capers.

But let me write about this again. For one last time.

I created Kitchen Capers a few years after Boon's untimely death. Leaving Seok Buay and Kim San behind, weeping for him. Seok Buay seems to take forever to heal. She was often resentful of things around her and highly defensive when someone spoke of Boon.

One thing I never told anyone was why I started baking. I started to bake soon after Boon's passing. Because Seok Buay loves to bake. Buay took time away from her home, to stay away from Boon's room and his things. And she would take up a baking course in France at the famous Le Cordon Bleu. And she would come back after a few weeks and tell me of her adventures there. Seeing her so joyful, it makes me happy for her.

Then it became my personal goal in life to help her to cope with Boon's passing. I refitted my home with a baking cabinet. I would seek for Buay's advice on how to bake. In time, I pick up website design and met Prashant Patel with whom I learnt website design from. Then I started Kitchen Capers forum as a hobby site to share recipes on cooking and baking. Mainly because I was also learning..and I wanted Buay to find new hope, new purpose in life. As she was totally illiterate in computers, emails or the Internet.

I would go to her house, and suggested that she cook something she likes and to share the recipe online at the forum. In these early days in the year 2004, I started cooking, baking and documenting every recipe she had in her mind. And as she cooks, she talks and laughs at the same time. The food she serves are of course delicious..and knowing her, the love and joy in every dish she prepares can be savoured and enjoyed to the last bite.

With the popularity of social networking aka Facebook, a fellow church member wrote to me to say that Seok Buay has passed away on the 28th September 2011. I was totally in shock, because I knew she was fit as a fiddle. She was happy with life and with Kim San. Despite not having Boon around, she found joy and happiness in the things she does everyday. She found comfort reading the scriptures and peace from God whenever she prays.

And everytime when I know that she is going away to a country to serve the community, I would bake all the things she loved to eat. And that would be the signature Chocolate Walnut cookie I created for her. And she said once to me :

"Gina, wherever I am, I know you think of me. Eating this, knowing you, that's a blessing God gave to me and only to me alone"

I never share this recipe online or anywhere. It was a cookie I created just for Buay. A cookie to remind me of how much I loved her and respected her all the years she taught me to bake, to cook. She taught me to be bold, to be daring. To try out new things and not be afraid to accept failures. She would tell me about Boon and how she would teach him the same values too.

In so many ways, I know myself. I know I would not have dare to venture beyond. Not with Kitchen Capers. I mean, I started my career in computers. I taught computer programming, desktop publishing..not cooking or baking. Buay gave me so much hope which I thought I was giving to her instead.

I attended her wake on Friday, 30 September 2011..I walked and met Kim San, and I just couldn't control myself. I cried in his arms, holding Kim San tightly. And Kim San wept with me. For a moment, I could have swear the world stood still..with Kim San and I locked in each other's arms, in tears and crying out to each other.

The last time this happened, it was at Boon's funeral wake. And I was there, in the same position but it was with Buay in my arms, letting her cry her heart out to me. I had to take a day's leave from the office. I told my boss why..and he just sign my leave form and ask me to go.

Kim San told me that he blamed himself for Buay's sudden death. She was swimming in a private pool in a swimming club. Somehow, something happened..she drowned and no one came to her aid. Until minutes later, they tried to resuscitated her. By the time the ambulance came, she was pronounced dead.

Her body lied in the hospital for a day to find out the cause of death. And he said to me :

"Buay never goes swimming without me. We go together. Every day, we do things together. Going for breakfast, going for morning walks or even just to shop at the nearby market. We would be there for each other.." and then he went silent..and I could see tears forming in his eyes. I put my arms around him and try to comfort my friend.

And then he said :

"She would tell me how much she loved me. And she would openly hug me and kissed me in front of everyone." and then he smiled and continue to say

"But that is not allowed in our society. People think we are crazy"

and then I said :

"No, you are not crazy. To love and be loved is the greatest gift and to show it openly, that's pride. And that's what God intended us to do. To love and be loved...in each and every way we can."

When I left the wake, I thought to myself..okay, life goes on. Back to the office, there's work to be done. Get a hold of yourself..

But when the day ends, and all is quiet, I couldn't help but think of Buay again. When I went online at Facebook, there was a little app I had that says "What God wants you to know" and l click it to see what was the verse for the day. When I read it, I cried again.

And I shared my notes with what was given to me :

"On this day, God wants you to know
... that sometimes it may feel too hard to do it alone. Sometimes it may seem like you can't figure it out by yourself. Sometimes will and strength and courage are not enough. Sometimes in your life you will need to call out for help. Call on God. God will be there."

My response to that was :

Dear God, I have a friend who is going up there to meet you. Please see her at the gates and hold her hand and show her around your place. And when its time for me to see her, ask her to come and meet me at the gates. Tell her how much I am so gonna missed her here. And her name is Seok Buay.

So to all who know me..and knows me for Kitchen Capers..
Live and love life to the fullest each day. Tell the people you loved how much you loved him/her or them. Even if its a pet. Live like there is no tomorrow. For tomorrow may never come. At least you get to say your goodbyes, your expressions and your admiration for that person.

I know I have grieved for many, but Seok Buay will always be that special someone I hold dear to my heart, someone I loved till the end of time. And when I go up there, I know she will be at the gates. Waiting for me. Waiting to show me all the new things up there. Like she always have whenever she sees something new.

Till then, Sister Seok Buay, wait for me. Wait for me.

AMEN!

I Love You Because

2011-09-23T09:23:00.002+08:00

I Love You Because, sung by the late Jim Reeves

I was really busy with my new baking studio, and I didn't have time to blog. But today decided to write something to update you on my life with Benny.

I was swamped with work having to manage the retail business and the new studio. I was feeling unappreciated, depressed and totally drained. All I could do everyday was to sulk or frown. There seems to be a back log of everything I had to do every day in the office.

It pains Benny to see me in this state of mind and soul. Without a doubt he knew what he had to do. He quit his full time job last Thursday, cleared his leave with the company and left. And immediately started work with me in the shop. He would fetch me to work, help me with the simple things. Help me to pack and unpack stuff. Did the labellings, handled the store when new stock came.

Sure I see him everyday when he used to work for others. But now I see more of him every day, every minute. It brings us closer. We talk a whole lot more. And we are reminded of the early days of our courtship together. How much we would tell each other the things that happen each day.

And even though going to work was a door away...he was always in the shop and I am now stuck in the baking studio, he would sms me and 'whispers' sweet nothings. Or sometimes just pop over to the studio to just ask me how I was coping.

I guess I can say I am the happiest and most blessed WOMAN in the world. Having the best job ever and having my 'lover' next to me all the time.

We go to work together. We eat our meals together. And now, he wants to spend every waking moment with me. He would even watch all those soapy drama serials on Channel 8 with me.

And yesterday he told me :

"When the business settles down, I'll take you on a holiday..to anywhere you wanna go. Its been such a long time we went on a holiday together, just the 2 of us."

I was over the moon when I heard that. It will be another year before the shop and the studio settles down. But even so, having him by my side all the time is like having a holiday.

So today I wrote in FB under my profile status :

"Going to work everyday is now like having a date with my one true love everyday. A week has just past, seems like a whole lifetime has just slipped away. So how much more you should never take Love for granted. Live and love as much as you can. Doing the things you want to do, drinking from the same cup of juice or eating from the same plate of char kway teow."

How many men would quit their jobs to work with their wives? I knew only one..Benny. But I knew of many women would quit their jobs for their husbands.

When God gave me a husband, He meant that he would last me a lifetime. And he did. I once heard an old love song which I forgotten who sang it or what was the title of it. But i remembered many of its lyrics which goes like this:

You are my one true love
Say that you never go
You'll always be the one
True love within my heart

You're like an evening star
Shinning from high above
Lighting my life for me
You are my one true love

Okay if I sound super hopelessly in love as if I was a teenager. But how can I not be? Benny makes me feel like this everyday now. Every morning, a smile on his face, hugs me or pats my back. And ask if I had a good rest last night..

Side track a bit...here are the final photos of my baking studio which went LIVE this week.

My Journey of a 1000 miles

2011-08-23T09:08:00.003+08:00

God will make a Way, sung by Don Moen

I am driven to tears as I am starting to write this. Of the journeys I have made in life, I find this particular one, the most endearing one I had to go through. Because I felt His presence all the time when I was making decisions and planning for this to happen.

As you have read(if you have been following my blog), that I was uncontestly pick to host all my culinary classes at Robinsons Departmental store last October 2010. That chapter in my life was meant to be..meant to happen and must happen. It was short..like 6 months to be exact.

Read this for reference :
http://tasteoftime.blogspot.com/2010/09/new-chapter.html
http://tasteoftime.blogspot.com/2011/01/been-there-done-that.html

As a Christian, we believed that everything that happens to us, happens for a reason. Some reasons are easier to figure out on your own. Others seem too complicated to think about. But at the end of each day, you learn to walk on it, move on and start a new day with more confidence.

I want to write about this 2nd journey of mine. After my episode at Robinsons, I felt as if a burden was lifted from my shoulders. A part of me wanted to quit, another part of me wanted to carry on. I was totally confused. And I brought this all to God. Asking for His favour and asking that He teach me what to do. And how to react. And most important of all, to move on from there.

It must have been God's plans that I was to go through this with everyone who had dealings in this project. Everyone..including my best friends, the suppliers, and of course with my girls, and with Benny.

The lease for my retail shop was to end in September 2011. By April 2011, I finished my last class at Robinsons, and closed that chapter in my life. And back at square one, I returned home and taught again. I prayed to God,

'Teach me, bend me, shape me..but whatever it is, I thank you Lord. For showing me the way. For letting me know there is always hope when there is You(*God)."

And every project I do for myself or for others, I do it with alot of passion. I gave my all that is within me. So when I leave, a part of me dies. Sadness devoured me. I took time to re-charge. I took time to think of what I could have better or worse. Constantly battling little demons here and there.

But our Heavenly Father does not like to see us in pain, in agony. It is always in my desire to have my own baking studio, a place I call my own. I teach what I like, when I like. I will put stuff in there like I would with my house. An extension from my home.

The shop next to my retail shop was tenanted by someone who sells baby apparel. I vaguely remembered that they open for business sometime last year around Christmas and for over 3 months, things seemed cheerful for them.

After the festivities(Christmas, and Chinese New Year), business was really bad for them. Many came to browse around, but people leave soon after. After some months of struggling, they closed the shop. For months the shop's doors remained closed. They tried to sublet the shop out to others just to cover the rent. But no one took the offer.

I was on the other hand, eying on this shop. It was ideal to host this as a baking studio. Why? its literally next door to my shop. So when I teach, people can go back to the shop to buy stuff to go home and practice what they learnt.

So together with Benny, we put this matter with God. We told Him what we wanted and how we wanted. And we left it up to God to help us. If it was meant to be, all obstacles will be erased.

When the landlord came to ask if we wanted to renew our lease for the retail shop, I ask them about the unit next door. They said the previous tenant have already paid up and technically, its free now for anyone to take up the unit. But the property agent also told me this :

"Gina, the previous tenant made a big loss. They closed and never made money from it. So when they left, they didn't remove all the fixtures, furnishings, etc as part of the lease contract was to remove all fixtures when you leave. Are you sure you want this?"

And I said, "Let's see what they left behind"

He open up the place and when I step into it, the first thing that came to me was "AMEN! Thank You Lord!"

The flooring was marbled. The walls were painted white. The lights and fixtures are done. The airconditioning was fitted too. And used only for 4 to 5 mths. And all the power points were already fixed. The glass door(slidling) was intact. The light box outside the shop for the signboard was also done.

This alone can save me a good S$15,000 just to fix up.

Verbally, I told the agent..YES. In the meantime I told Benny about it. I didn't wait for him to give me the green light to go ahead.

Next came the finances to fix up kitchen cabinets and appliances(cake mixers, ovens, etc). My sister, Winnie came to the rescue and invested an undisclosed sum to help us kick start the studio's renovations.

And it was just timely that she found a job like 6 mths ago..if not, she wouldn't have the funds to help us with this.

Together we went to God again. Just Benny and myself. This time we said in unison:

"God, thank you for this. We know its from you. Why? and How? Because only You can move mountains, clear the seas to form small rivers and roads. It is only You can make miracles. Things that seem impossible are made possible. We give our Thanks to you. This baking studio will not just teach culinary courses. But it will be a place for us to glorify You. A place where you first showed us that People Learn from one another, just as Iron sharpens iron, Proverbs 27 verse 17. AMEN!

One of the most important thing I wanted to do with this studio was to open the doors to the less privileged folks, the poorly educated people out there. To offer them reduced rates to learn a new skill. And in time hired someone to help me to run it. And that someone has to be one of these people who needed help. So that they can be self sufficient. In small ways, one step at a time.

Because this is what Kitchen Capers is all about. That was how it was started...

Extracted from my KC Website:

http://www.kitchencapers.net/html/aboutus.htm
About Us

How Kitchen Capers was formed

The Kitchen Capers online forum was initially created in July 2004 and dedicated to the late Tan Boon Teik, a young gentleman I never knew or loved. He was Kim San and Seok Buay's only child. He passed away suddenly Kim San and Seok Buay are friends I knew from the church I was attending here in Singapore. As it is with all good friends we should help each other when we can. This is my way of helping Kim San and Seok Buay.

The dream of writing and publishing a cookbook was Boon's idea which he shared with his mom. After his death, Seok Buay could never find the strength nor the courage to carry out his dream. Thus, this website was created. And Buay's vision for the future was to teach cooking and Basic English to poor women around the world. So that they do not have to live a life of poverty and living out their days begging in the streets.

Sister Seok Buay was trained to be an English teacher and she is also a gourmet cook. She taught me many secrets in cooking and baking. Things I would have never known even if I had read a lot of cookbooks.

With that in mind, I started the website and a forum message board to share recipes on cooking and baking. Buay taught me the spirit of giving, of charity. She never holds back anything she knew about cooking or baking. Sister Seok Buay taught me many skills, of which I find the most endearing one was Charity. To share openly and without prejuidice and never to hold back anything you learn from others or by yourself. It is only that when you share, you gain. In friendship and in kind. I am deeply encourage and inspired by Sister Seok Buay.

In the year 2008, I started KC online and started selling bake ware products and cake decorations tools via the website. A year later, I opened my first retail store in Singapore at Kallang Bahru.

And I hope that you share this vision with us too. Enjoy your time here with us at Kitchen Capers.

Gina Choong
Owner and Board Admin for Kitchen Capers

*****
I will share more photos later on when the agent give me the keys.

This post serves to remind myself that God is always HERE for me, for us, for you. That everything in life we go through, God plays an important part. I have always prayed for good times and give thanks for bad times. And in all, He never fails to lift up my spirits, to give me more reasons that despite all the unhappiness, all the sadness in the world, there is HOPE, there is Light at the end of tunnel...and there is LOVE from GOD!

May you be blessed..as you go thru life's tribulations and trials. At every step you take, God takes 2 for you. Why 2? 1 for you, the other He takes in advance. Leading the way ahead. Paving your way.

AMEN!

My Greatest Fear

2011-07-02T10:53:00.006+08:00

That's What Friends Are For, sang/performed by Dionne Warwick, Stevie Wonder, Gladys Knight, Sir Elton John

While chatting with H on happy things, I ask her an interesting topic:

"H, what is your greatest FEAR?"

She said :

"flying cockroaches..!"

And I said to her :

"I fear the sea...the ocean."

H said "I loved the sea..but why you fear it?"

When I was very young, maybe 5 to 6 years. My uncle Bill used to take us out to Changi beach for picnic and swimming. I couldn't swim at all. So he got me a float so that I could go out to sea with my cousin John. But John could swim. And he swam really well. The sea that day was choppy, high winds and all. I was just next to John, then he said "let's swim over there to my dad.." then he turn around, kick his legs and accidentally kick off the float I was clinging on for dear life.

The float drifted away and I was struggling to keep afloat. Then I sunk..I opened my eyes and saw greenish water all around me. I saw bubbles above my eyes as I was trying to scream. And my screams were not heard underwater..I struggled and raised my hands and tried to make sure it was above water so someone would see me.

It must have been minutes but it seem like hours and no one came. My tears were mixed with the sea water around me, and I cried, but no one can hear me. I felt pain in my chest, and the bubbles started to diminish right before my eyes. I knew I was drowning...so in one last breath, I closed my eyes and told God I am coming. Please wait for me.

Then I felt someone grabbing my arms, and carrying me. I couldn't my eyes because the salt sea water have blurr my vision. For a moment I thought I have passed on and was in God's arms. Then I heard my uncle calling me, pressing my chest to revive me and to throw up the water.

When I finally opened my eyes, I could then see, it was my uncle who came to save me. And I knew God's plan for me was to stay here. My time isn't up yet. Since then, I learnt to swim. When I was in Secondary school, I entered the swimming team and won many prizes in swimming carnivals.

But the fear of drowning never leaves me. I took up Survival courses in swimming. I pass the Bronze level and went for the Silver. But when I was told that we needed to spend half a day out at sea to test our endurance in choppy waters, I chickened out. Then I realised that despite knowing how to float now and even how to swim, I could not bring myself to go out to sea again. I could never swim in the open ocean. The fear never leaves me. Even though our swimming coach was around and he had other assistants who are life guards to be on standby. I just couldn't bring myself to go out to sea again.

Some years later, when I working for Jardine Fleming, my boss send me on my first maiden trip to Jakarta. Just a 3 day work week to hold meetings and discussions with the Publications team at our Jakarta office. I was bound to take SilkAir flight out of Singapore to Jakarta. The plane was due to arrive JKT at 8am, then I had planned to be jostled downtown from airport to the hotel and check in and leave for the office for meeting by noon.

When I boarded the plane, everything seemed fine. All systems go, so to speak. Then the plane couldn't lift off..some technical problems. All of us could hear the engine moving but also it make funny noises too. We were stuck in the plane, on ground for over an hour. Then the Captain allowed us to make calls to our families, friends or biz here in Singapore to say that we will be late to arrive in Jakarta. And ask them*our Singaporean family to relay the message to our counterparts in Indonesia.

The captain assured us that we will not be leaving the plane to board another saving us the hassles of moving and transferring. But the ground crew need to check a couple of 'things' before lift off.

Finally at almost 11am, the plane took off and we landed in Jakarta by noon. By that time all my plans delayed. The going home part was smooth however.

When I went back to the office, my boss Su Chzeng said to me :

"Gina, you are on SIA planes, aren't they the safest, fastest around?"

2 months later...this same SilkAir plane plunged into the Palembang River, Indonesia, killing everyone on board. Su Chzeng was in shock..she told me "I take my words..!"

A brush with death..but God kept me safe..

Some years later, our family went for a short 4 day trip to Phuket. Benny couldn't join us as he couldn't take leave. So I went with my girls, my parents, my sis, her hubby and my niece. We did all the sea sports. I had to face up to my own fears. In one occasion, we went scuba diving. The guide was good and gather us around. We swam in small groups. Melody was barely 4 back then. A dip in the sea is just too much for her. The wind was extremely strong that day. The sea current wasn't too forgiving. She wanted out..and sat on the boat and watch us.

The guide told us to gather together as the currents are getting too strong. I heard him, and as I was about to swim my way to him, the current proved too strong for me..I drifted away...with the scuba gear on my back, and my fear got the best of me..I struggled vigorously and shouted for help. But the wind carried my voices out to sea..and I was starting to drift further away from the group. Although I was still afloat, I could only think I was dying again.

Thank God, my brother in law, Francis was nearby. And he waved to the boat driver. And he drove the boat around to pick me up.

Another brush with death and its with the sea again. That incident left me somewhat shaken. I shuddered to think what the future is for me with the sea. But still I was thankful that God saved me again.

A month later, Tsunami hits Phuket, wiping out the village and the tourist spots. And Tsunami hits that very same spot I was in back then.

When I told H, I realised for so many times I have that close brush with death. Almost dying but life given back to me. My greatest fear to date is still swimming in the open ocean. But never about anything else. I live my life loving everyone, everything. All the time.

Why?

Because I REALLY do not know what the future holds for me. What will happened next. How many times have you had that close brush with death. ?

Like in the movies "Final Destination"...I cheated death so many times over. How much longer can I do this.?

So live your life to the fullest. Like there is no tomorrow. Mend old hurts today, not tomorrow. Rekindled old friendships now. Say you love your mom or dad or mother in law or child today, every day. Show you care. Because your next breath of life may be your last.

Purple Glasses

2011-06-20T10:32:00.006+08:00

I Won't Let Go sung by the group Rascal Flatts

It was something I use to say or recite when I have to say something that has a different viewpoint with others. It was a poem of sorts I read somewhere, but never knew who wrote it. No amount of googling, I still can't find the originator of this poem.

The Way I See It, may not be the way you see
But no matter how, let's share it
Your glasses are pink
and Mine are Blue
but someday we'll all have a pair of purple glasses too.

Recently a friend shared online at FB of a news article about women who are still grieving over the loss of their newborns or stillbirth. How the women found solitude by buying a life-liked doll that looks like a baby, complete .. Read the full story here

http://www.themoneytimes.com/featured/20110530/lifelike-babies-offering-hope-grieving-mothers-id-101701710294.html

When I read the article, I thought it was really creepy. Having gone thru 3 miscarriages and although I never had a baby in my arms and he/she died, I still find this very creepy to read.

Personally, I still feel that the best way to grieve over a loss of a loved one is to cry over it. To learn to come into terms with the loss and to move on. And to move on would mean you find new hope in other forms. Like a new hobby, maybe new friends or a new job sometimes.

But having a life like doll is not the answer to this. Maybe it heals for a period of time, but it doesn't really solve the problem. I know its quite controversy to talk about this. Different people healed differently.

Pain and suffering is part and parcel of life on earth. Everyone has to go thru it at some point of time in their life. Either with a loved one, a loyal pet, a best friend or having to walk out even from an abusive family. We have to leave behind, always something we loved. If it doesn't hurt, it means nothing to you. If it hurts, you know you have loved and given so much and expected nothing back.

Although I sympatised with the many women who are grieving over lost loved ones, I would find it disturbing and studded my healing process to get a doll of some sort to help me heal.

When my Beauty died in my arms, I cried for many hours. At night before bedtime, I cried for her. I raised her in her puppy days. I taught her all the doggy tricks. Although many would tell me : "Gina, she is just a dog. Not like she was your own baby"

Yes, she was just a dog, my pet dog. But she was there when Jonathan died inside me. When I was pregnant and into my 1st trimseter with Jonathan. My baby with whom I never get to hold or to see or to smell his baby hair. Beauty was with me and she saw my pain. And she stayed by my bed for days.

Sometimes I would stare into space and my mind starts to wander off. And Beauty would sense it all. And she would come to me, wagging her tail and her ears drawn back and expecting a hug and cuddle. As if she knew. I like to think that she did.

So she was just a dog. She was like my guardian angel. While I was grieving, my 'girl' comforted me. Not that Benny couldn't comfort me..but he was also grieving.

The pain and suffering eluded me for months. I was so miserable that I gave up trying to have another baby after Jonathan. My prayers were answered...later. Melody came to me a year after I lost Jonathan. In the process of healing, God showed me that I needed to heal properly, not just internally, but also spirtually and emotionally. So that I can be a better testimony to myself and to others.

I know also, that not everyone has the same blessings as me. Not everyone had a successful pregnancy or birth of their kid soon after loosing one.

I remembered years ago, when Natasha was still a baby, a friend of mine lost her husband to Dengue Fever. Her world of perfection fell apart almost immediately. After the death of her husband, she found it too painful to stay in the home they build together. She was in tears all the time whenever she was home alone.

So she moved back to her mom's place and stayed for a while. When she was still grieving and mending the pieces, she found that she was pregnant. And maybe because she was busy with the funeral and arrangements at home, she neglected her health. Through this unhappy times, she lost her baby too.

She hated herself and wanted to end it all. And she felt it was her fault that she lost the only thing that kept the memories of her hubby alive in her. No amount of crying or consoling her helped. She went into depression for a few months. And finally, she told me :

"Gina, I am selling the house. And everything in it. But I have with me, my memories. Of all the days I have know him and loved him. Even with the baby I have lost. I'm packing up, moving on. Leaving Singapore and going to USA. My boss was kind enough to offer me a job posting in USA's office. I don't know what the future holds for me there. But if its something new, I look forward to it. And can at least closed this chapter in my life here in Singapore. I thanked God for friends who stood by me in my time of need. I don't want to keep in contact. If I think I am ready, I will write to you again."

Sadly, to date, I have not heard from her. I wished her well. Hope that she has recovered. I have shifted from my first home when she used to have my address.

My post is not about how you should grieve or how you should move on. But a post to say that we learn the same things, but we may or may not agree or do the same things. The knowledge is the same, the practice of this knowledge is different. But whatever you do, you do it in the best of your knowledge and what your inner self cheers you on. It is all within you that you are what you are..the DNA and the chemistry of it all.

The most important thing at the end of the day is you are happier..with the choices you made in life. Though some works, and some just don't. But you are better each time when one didn't work. Because you learn from it. What needs to be fixed and what just are not meant to be fixed. And each time you learn how to cope, and to move on.

I still cry over a sad movie. And if I see something that reminds me of my past hurts, I still weep a tear or two. But that is just human nature. Not because I have not moved on or coped. We should still hold on to the memories of the past, of things that made us happy.

Because it is such memories that pushes us on...for a better tomorrow and a brighter yesterday.

Over the Rainbow

2011-06-16T09:06:00.012+08:00

Over The Rainbow, sung by Israel Kamakawiwo'Ole

I seemed to have disappeared from blogging for a while. Too much heartbreaks and work and with a new maid, I was wearing so many hats in a week that I thought I could pull it through.

When my niece Tricia was still in her late teens, her boyfriend, Michael brought her a puppy. It was a long coated Chihuahua.

Tricia stayed with my parents, her parents in the same house. In our family, every new pet that comes into the house is treated as one of the family. We invite them with open arms, tender love and we have parties at home to gather our extended family, our best friends to welcome them(the pets).

Tricia named him Bambi. Because he was adorably cute. Aren't all babies cute?

He grew up in that household, loved and adored..then Tricia went to Australia for 2 years for her studies. Michael would come over and took care of Bambi..to shower him with love and kisses because Bambi missed Tricia terribly. He use to sleep in her room, on her bed, next to her face.

Whenever I visit my parents, I would go and look out for Bambi. And I would call his name " Bambi, Bambi". He would dash out from where he is at...and jump up and down with delight asking for a cuddle. Which I would do all the time. I would hold him, cuddle him for 10 to 15 mins. Sometimes I would talk to him as if I was talking to a child. Because I have never treated him as an animal..but more of an extended family member.

And without fail, all the years that have passed, whenever I visited my parents, I would always do the same thing..after greeting my parents, I would go and seek him out first..then followed by all the other pets in the house. Because Bambi knows his packing order..He was the first pet..followed by the cat..then came Winter, the Bull Mastiff dog which Tricia rescued from the Puppy mill. Winter was used for breeding only. She never saw the lights of things outside her cage. Only saw the handler who took care of her when she was pregnant or when her puppies were born.

Tricia loved animals..all creatures big and small. From the tiniest of insect to the creepy crawlies to the scaly snake and down the furry animals. Even the cat was an abandoned feline..she would bring him home and loved him.

This is Winter, the Bull Mastiff. Also loved and adored in our homes.

This is Summer, the cat that was abandoned and also rehomed with Tricia. Its me carrying Summer.

In the last couple of 2 years on..Bambi became ill. First he went blind. Tricia was working late almost every night and my sister took it upon herself to care for Bambi in his last days. Michael would come and visit and help to tend to Bambi every weekend.

Poor little Bambi, gone blind but tearing each time..so they had to put the cone on him all the time. Even so, being blind, I would still visit him and would still call his name. And he would listen to my voice and navigate his way around and find me. But he could no longer jumped like before but his tail never stop wagging and I know in my heart I just need to hug him, to cuddle him and to show him I am here. And I still loved him all the time.

When his eyes went blind, the vet told my sister that his days are numbered. Through a scan, they found a tumour in his tiny brain. The doctor gave him only 6 months or less..but he survived for a year..completely blind.

Then he became extremely ill, frail and either vomit every other day or had diarrhea. My girls never grew up to like him. Because Bambi is terrorised everyone at home. He doesn't like children or adults. He doesn't like my mom or my dad. He definitely didn't like my brother in law who is Tricia's dad. In his last days being ill, he didn't like Tricia anymore. If she would to come close to him, he will snarl and snap at her.

You may think that Bambi is ungrateful for the love Tricia had for him or doesn't know what is right or wrong. Who feeds you, who loves you, who doesn't?

But if you put yourself in Bambi's eyes and life, you would understand how he felt. When he was well and happy go lucky dog, no one respected him or gave him a pat on his head or cuddled him. Tricia worked day and night..sometimes she would just come home to change, sleep. My mom used to joke to us that although they all lived in the same house, she doesn't know if Tricia is home or not..! much less Bambi.

Then last month, sometime in May 22, my sister sms me to say that Bambi is in the animal hospital at Sunset Way. That's like the other end of Singapore! She said he may not survive the night and she hopes that he dies peacefully in his sleep than for them to give him the jab to end his suffering. He was found to have kidney failure and the kidneys are failing..one dead, the other was also failing. He was unable to eat or drink and was put on a drip for days.

I had to go and see him. Just to say goodbye and to tell him things again. And so I did...I ask the nursing staff at the hospital to take a photo of me holding him...

When I look at this photo, it tears me badly..he was struggling with all that is left in him to sit up..and putting his head resting on my chest.

When I entered the cage, I call his name again : Bambi, Bambi.
And though he was sleeping, he heard me calling him..And he tried so hard to lift up his head and I slided my palm under his chin..

I whispered to his ears and said to him :

Bambi, Wait for everyone to come and see you, then go..Go in peace. And know that I always have a special spot in my heart for you.!

Then I put him back into the cage, I stroked him and planted kisses on him. And I told him I had to go. But my thoughts are always with him.

The next day, he passed away peacefully, in the arms of Michael and Tricia. They wept bitterly for him.

And for a week, I couldn't get things done at home or at work. And started to think..

This is not my dog. He's Tricia's. And he doesn't live with me. And I don't see him often. So why should it tear me just as much as my own pet's dying on me? Then I realised that all these while, all these years, I have given him a part of me. A love from afar.

I shared with a friend of mine..and then she said to me..:

"Gina, even a dog knows you are sincere. You give everyone, human or animal the same kind of respect and the same kind of love. So its only natural that should one leave, the other hurts."

And then I realised that my extended family are like me too..in this context. When my Beauty(shetland sheepdog) was ill and dying, sms was sent out to all. I remembered my cousin ringing me and crying on the phone. I remember my Aunty Aileen sms me and comforting me.

This is FAMILY, this is LOVE.

Treat everyone, every living thing with love, with respect and in return, the world seems a happier place.

Rest in Peace, Bambi..until that day comes, meet me at the gates of Heaven.

Lonely Me...

2011-06-14T10:50:00.004+08:00

I'll be Loving You Forever sung by the group West Life.

This is going to be a very lonely week for me at work. For the last 2 years since we open shop, Benny always spends his after work hours with me. Without fail..every day. This week, starting from tomorrow, he is sending his car for servicing and he says he won't be able to come. Then on Thursday and Friday, he was invited to 2 different dinners outside. So won't be coming too.

It suddenly dawned on me how lonely I felt. How miserable it was to spend my days at my shop alone. Even though he only comes in the evening..at around 7pm and within an hour, we closed the shop. He would help me to close the shop, pull down the shutters and drive me home. In the car, I would tell him things ..anything and everything. Some silly things, some happy things. But we often talk about our girls. That ride home is only 15 to 20 minutes. Yet it seem to be very long.

For the past week(last week), I noticed that he was making it all up for projected lost time. He took time off work to spend with me at home. And he bought me lychees and stuff to eat. Benny is not a man of many words..but he is definitely a man of Action. If you love him enough or more like the way I did with him, then you understand the things he does..he does it out of love.

In many ways, I talked about stress and sleeplessness. My friends ask me if I were stress at work. I always say I am not. Because I enjoy what I do every day. And even if I have to come home and cook just for him, I would do with it with so much energy and zest for life.

And he would ask me to ring up the house on our ride home from the shop..to ask the maid to steam up food or heat up the soup I have cooked the day before. But I would say to him...

"No. We would reach home, and while you bathe, I would prepare the food for you. "

I know most people wouldn't have bothered and would just ask their maids(domestic helper) to get it done. But I see this simple gesture as my way of bonding with him. I am dead tired after a long hard day at the shop. And Benny sees that too. He never dare to ask me to do anything for him after work.

But if Love is all I have for him, its the little things in life I do that brings out the best of me for him.

In the summer of 1997, we went to USA for 14 days. But Benny couldn't extend his leave to 14 days and ended his holidays with us in 10 days. We went there with my parents, my niece and my daughter Natasha. Seen in this photo, this photo was taken at The Golden Gate at San Francisco, USA. We later travelled to CA, USA to stay with my aunt and uncle for the last 4 days.

When we were apart, holidays doesn't seem too happy for me. And Benny was miserable throughout his air travel from LA, USA back to Singapore. Even when he was home, he felt a pain in his heart as if it was stabbed with a knife.

Since after that in 1997, I swore to myself to be there for him always. In more ways that he would have thought of. Even the simpliest of all things, prepping a meal which the house maid could do or getting him a drink or even just making hot tea..I would see to it that I do it for him.

Our 14th Wedding anniversary, celebrated in the month of November, together with my aunts/uncles who are also celebrating theirs in November. When our girls are still really young...

In the little things that counts..these are things that counts. When my friends see that I go all out to cook for him. And to satisfy all his cravings on any kind of food, they often say "Benny is so blessed. " Because Benny completes me and blesses me just as much.

In ways he knows best..the things he does for me daily. I know.

A Road Less Travelled

2011-05-22T09:10:00.004+08:00

I Know Who Holds Tomorrow , old Christian Hymn

For many years, I self taught myself, many many skills. For many years, my dad reminded me that to take up the cross of God meant that He must call me to the field. Its not the same when you choose to leave your job or current status and go into the field to do missionary work.

All these years, I have been waiting and waiting and watching and waiting. For God to call me, to do His will. In the midst of it all, I did things I enjoy doing most. Loving the people around me. Learning to be like my mom. Who selflessly learn to cook and to bake and to feed others. She would give without expecting anything in return and often she would say "I want you to be happy." So to see a smile, means the world to her. For years I grew up in her household, and seeing the joy she had when she gives to others.

And I told myself that one day if I can be like someone important or special, I just want to be like her..like my mom is to others.

In the process of learning to cook and to bake, I started to feed others. With the help of friends like Ray Khoo, he taught me many skills and reaching out to the less privileged. In the process I met many people..most of them in halfway houses, away from their homes with a past. It is thru this, I met Benny Seteo, now the boss of the chain of restaurants named 18 Chefs

This is Benny Se Teo, seen here at one of his restaurants.

I met Benny Se Teo (side note : he is not my Benny! LOL~) at Highpoint Halfway House at Lorong 1 Geylang. Ray brought me there to mingle with the ex-convicts. They had funding from the Government to run business. So they wanted to open a restaurant. In the initial days, we spent time talking about food, creating recipes, perfecting it. Benny Se Teo was to be the Head Chef and to create and design new dishes for the restaurant. My job was purely just to taste his food, be a critic and give him pointers on how to improve and with Ray, we taught them various skills for the restaurant.

The restaurant was named Goshen. The region of Goshen is located in northeastern Egypt, in the The Delta of the Nile River, where it empties into the Mediterranean Sea. The Sinai Peninsula is just to the east. To the south are the famous Pyramids, and the Valley of The Kings, where many Mummies have been discovered.

Why Goshen? I would questioned Ray. He says Goshen is a desert area, a place where no crops will grow. But God made good of it and all who dwell there bring forth goodness for generations to come. A restaurant named Goshen meant that our brothers in Christ(ex convicts) are left to fend and make good of the skills they learn and bring wealth to themselves and happiness for all.

When I first started working and helping out at Goshen Restaurant, my mom feared for my safety. Those who volunteered, are men. No woman dared to work there. Mainly because these folks are ex-convicts. Many had a past..some went in and out of prison several periods in their lives.

But Ray taught me to look beyond and past that. He taught me to love them. And when you love them, all the goodness and blessings you get from God comes out, in turn, you are able to accept them with all their problems and all their insecurities. And care for them as much as you would with others.

It is this road I walked on, and travelled on it for those years that made me realised that my calling from God was to do this. To help these folks get back on track. It is through the universal language of LOVE evolves into food that my calling from God meant for me to help others.

And at the same time fulfilled my dream of what my mom had always been doing. Loving and caring for others, strangers and all.

My post today talks about a Road Less Travelled. Or uncharted waters. Something not planned, some roads you take in life that seems weary and long winded. Surrounded by harsh forest or frightful weathers. But if you travel on this road, God walks with you daily. He holds your hand and silently paces with you, by your side. As you stumbled each day, He picks you up and He clears that rock or pebble in your path so your next step is smoother.

And as you walk each day, you learnt to look up ahead. And if you see that rock or pebble ahead of you, you know what to do. You either clear it and if its deeply lodged into the ground, you learnt to hop over it. So in life, it is the same. Some things just comes smack into you, others block your path. And each day you learn to cope and each day the road that was less travelled becomes worn and leaving foot prints..of all the days you walk on it. And all your footprints left on it reminding you of your first step, and of your second step. It shows how you hop over a stone, kick that pebble or move that rock.

And the next time you become more bold and walk another mile for that winding, dark road..pucked up with courage and with God still holding your hand, you walk that new road, more boldly, wearing a smile on your face.

This is not a post to be boastful of the many journeys I made in my life. But to share with you and to encourage you that in life, we all must walk on one road that is less travelled and as we walk, we learn. And as we learn, we are smarter and better each time. No one is born into this world knowing what is next. But if you have God by your side, you are rest assured who holds your Tomorrows..and the path that leads you each day.

AMEN!

Amazing Grace : Milestones with Christ

2011-05-15T09:33:00.002+08:00

Amazing Grace (English version) sung by Gaither Vocal Band

I know I have talked about this before and hidden in bits and pieces of past blog entries here. But I wanted to share a bit more about this wonderful grace that God gives to us. And the milestones I have gone thru since birth with Christ.

From as far as I can remember, I knew for a long time, my life was created by God. He could have taken it back from my parents when I was a baby, but He chose to give it to them to keep and to nurture and to grow. To be in His likeness, in every way my parents could.

I was born with many medical problems. At the tender age of 6 months old, I went for my first surgery. To remove a diseased bone from my right rib cage. My dad told me that I spent several weeks in the hospital and my mom visited me at the hospital every day. When I was discharged, my mom hated hospitals and the smell of disinfectant. For some unknown reason, I grew up hating the smell of Dettol too.

When I was old enough to stand on my 2 feet, I started falling even just by walking. My mom would scold me if I run. In a way, that studded my growth, and I became slow in everything I do. I was never allow to run in the field or play vigorous sport of any kind. I never play tennis or basket ball or even the simple child's game of "catching". I can walk and suddenly my knees will just give way and I would fall.

As a child, my Uncle David would pick me up from school..on his back. He would carried me home. My relationship with Uncle David was extremely closed. I always see him as Big Brother than an uncle.

And then it happened when I was 4 years old. I went to the toilet at night, came out and just fell and hit the corners of the cabinet. That causes a deep cut on my forehead..just above my right eye. I bled non stop ...I was dressed in a white sleeping gown which my mom had painstakingly sewn by hand for me. I remembered my dress was in red..covered in blood. My dad rushed me to the hospital. And after that, my life changed completely.

The doctors back then said I lost alot of blood, and not enough oxygen in my brain, so my brain wasn't 'functioning' at full steam. It meant that I would become forgetful and I cannot remember short term things. Like studying for spelling or trying to remember a date or short term event.

Who would ever thought of learning Phonics back in the early 1960s? Most unheard of back then. My dad took up Phonics on his own and he taught me to read and spell using the phonics way. That requires no memory on my part and no extra brain work to do.

All my years in Primary school in Singapore, I spent hiding in my classroom. I cannot go for PE(Physical Education), no jumping of hoops, no running, no sports. I stood and watch from the window from my classroom where all my class mates run and play in the open field. I lead a quiet life you might say. I took on new hobbies..hobbies that doesn't require me to run or be in sports. I learn to draw, to colour, to paint. And I took up piano lessons too. I spent all my school holidays with my dad, with my cousin John. My dad would take me to watch Disney's animated movies or to the travelling circus(yes, Singapore used to have that too..!).

By the time I was in Secondary school, a new medical 'illness' plaque me. I had the lazy eye or squint eyes. And I had to go for surgery at age 14 years, or Secondary 2.

When I left secondary school and studied Pre U, my knee finally call it quits on me. I went for a major surgery on my left knee. That removed cartilage under the knee cap. It meant a life time of no vigorous exercise or movement on my knees. If I had a fall and I fell on my left side, I was to go for X Rays immediately to see the damage internally. That was also the reason I quit my job as MIS Manager with Batey Ads Singapore. An advertising agency in Singapore. I have over exert myself in the 3.5 years working for them. I quit to stay at home to nurse my knee. The doctor said "surgery or home therapy". Surgery is not a cure, just prolonged the expectancy of the knee. Home therapy is just slow and painful physiotherapy on my leg muscles.

When I left Batey, I couldn't even walk properly. That was how severe it got. I didn't quit to start Kitchen Capers or go into the culinary field. I did that out of boredom. After spending 25 years working non stop, suddenly I had nothing to do. And I haven't reach my retirement age yet as my girls are still young and school going age. I needed to work and have money for things.

Then in November 2007, I went for surgery for Appendicitis. 2 months later, I was in the hospital again. For hernia(from my appendicitis). Thank God for friends, my students who kept me safe and prayed for me when I was in the hospital. And the doctor who operated on me told me more unhappy news...

Due to my many health issues, he told me to stop taking a few food ingredients. Most of these are preservatives used in food preparation and all chemicals associated with baking. And I also found that I was allergic to artificial colouring used in colouring food. I would wheeze and had shortness of breath.

If you have met me in person, visiting me at my shop, you may think I looked healthy. But beneath all that, I am quite "unhealthy".

I had so many surgeries done on my body, the nerve endings on my body have been severed. I had no 'feelings' or 'sensations' of pain or heat if I am hurt until someone tells me..Should I stand next to a fire stove and the fire catches on my clothes, I won't be able to know..the nerve endings near my tummy area has been 'cut'.

Yet everyday, my life is a testimony. A living testimony that God decides when, and how and what.

My dad told me the day I accepted Christ as my personal Saviour that I am a Living Testimony for God. That whatever I do or say, testifies that God still believes that the world should go on. And that lives out there are still worth gathering in His name and tired souls and broken hearts are still worth mending.

If you noticed..maybe now you will, the next time you see me at my shop, I am actually walking on a limp. My left knee is still swollen and my right tummy area has a "pouch". As I live each day with the extras, my life with Christ remains strong and steadfast. Despite all my body offers to me, I am still in awe of Christ and all He has provided me.

AMEN!

I love you, Because

2011-05-04T08:28:00.003+08:00

I love you Because sung by the late Jim Reeves

I had a private cooking class last Wednesday. My student is a young wife. Newly married and settled into her first nuptial home with her hubby, she wanted to learn to cook for her hubby and also for her family. She told me she grew up on her maid's cooking. Despite being of Teochew dialect, she didn't know much about the cuisine that goes with it. Nor have any family heirloom recipe stashed away any where in her maternal home. Her parents went to work, and left her at home with the maid. The maid took care of the household, cleaning, washing and preparing meals 3x a day.

Well, to be frank, she was one of the many young wives I used to teach cooking to. So many similar stories I have heard of them never knowing their roots and some never got to know what binds them to a family. There never seems to be any family bonding.

I shared with her my own story. How my mom raised me. And I grew up on home cooked food my mom prepared for the family. My mom taught me many skills. May not be all food and cooking related. But she told me about our heritage, our culture and what it means to be Chinese. Despite being Christian, she says we must never forget our roots, though anti-Christ it may seem, as long as we follow the Bible teachings, lived by it, practiced what the Bible says, we just observe our heritage, that was good enough.

My mom says that when you travel to faraway lands, your skin colour is no longer something that proves to others your heritage or culture. Its what that is within you.

So whenever I teach cooking, and especially with cooking, I shared a bit of our Chinese culture, its deep rooted heritage to my students. The very things that made us Chinese. A cut from the rest of the other races.

But it is also love that binds us together. I shared with her many of my family's recipes, re-created for our modern home. With 'advance' or more "user friendly" kitchen utensils. But I also taught her the old way of how things are done and why it is done that way, and moving forward to new age and time.

Since she was teochew, and Benny was also Teochew, I decided to teach her to cook a traditional Teochew dish..the humble Teochew Bak Kut Teh or Pork Ribs Soup.

She asked me "I thought its black in colour, the soup I mean. Why is this soup cleared?"

I told her "the Black soup was cooked with chinese herbs and that's Hokkien. The Teochew version was clear soup cooked with the most minimal ingredients. So you get to taste the sweetness from the bones of the pork."

Here's the recipe to share with all. Something I learnt just by listening to my uncle Freddy's rave about the Teochew Bak Kut Teh soup.

Teochew Bak Kut Teh (Pork Ribs Soup)
Recipe By Gina Choong

Ingredients
1 kg pork ribs(ask the butcher for soft bone, chopped into smaller pieces)
5 pcs of garlic cloves, smash to break it open, retain the 'skin'.
1.5 tbsp white peppercorns
salt to taste
2 litres of water

Method:
1. Heat up water in a large casserole pot(claypot)
2. Add garlic, peppercorns and pork to cook for 5 mins over high heat.
3. Once it starts boiling(bubbling), lower the heat, cover the pot to cook over low heat for 45 minutes.
4. If the water evaporates till half the pot, just add water to refill.
5. Add salt to taste.
6. Serve hot with freshly sliced chilli and some soya sauce.

A traditional dish served with just plain warmed rice. Benny's favourite, all the time. Now its also our girl's favourite soup dish. Simple and yet refreshing.

Something Stupid, Something Good

2011-05-02T08:52:00.006+08:00

Something Stupid, sung by actress Nicole Kidman and song artiste Robbie Williams

Yesterday we close the shop at 7pm, instead of 8:30pm. So that we could go and have dinner with the family..Benny's side of the family. At a restaurant near our shop and also near my mother in law's home. It was May 1st, her birthday. She's either 87 or 89. How come I didn't know? No candles on the birthday cake. And the siblings were 'fighting' over what number to say when they lit the candle. One say "Chinese birthday is plus 2", the other say we live in the real world, it should be minus two.. And I thought last year she was 87?? oh well, like they say "its the thought that counts.." To come together as a family, extended with all her 4 children, their spouses, kids in toll, to celebrate it with her, that's important.

This year I decided to make a special cake for her..Vegetarian all the way. No eggs, no flour, just sugar and water and jelly powder..yes, a jelly cake. It didn't have to be big, its just for her. I just assumed that she would like it. Our girls bought a stalk of a red flower for her. And it seems that our girls are the only grandchildren who got her something.

This is what I made on Saturday , fussing over it.

To be frank, the center was supposed to be a red flower jelly. During the pouring of warm jelly into the layers, the flower melted and smudged/fused into the jelly. When its done, I realised the top was just a smudgy red spot. So I have to improvised quickly. I use a round fluted cutter and press into the center at the top. See this photo of it...see how ugly it was??

And luckily I have a few cans of fruit cocktail at home..so I opened one, picked out the peaches, grapes and cherries and put it into the hole ... and viola! a new jelly cake is made.

When I presented her the cake, and told her it was a jelly cake, she said out loud :

"we have this for cake cutting later, I don't want the other cake..!"

Benny was seated next to his mom and he told her "She made this for you, to bring home and enjoy. This is not a real birthday cake, we should cut the one the others bought for you.."

And she told me "Gina, I like jelly cake. I am happy"

That certainly made my day..and it ended very well for me.

After the dinner, we drove to her home and did the usual photo taking, candle blowing, cake cutting, birthday song singing, etc. I hid the jelly cake into the fridge.

We left after the cake was served as it was getting late. On the way home, Benny told me that our day ended with so many blessings from God. Our sales shot beyond our target last night despite closing an hour and a half earlier. And we got to have dinner with his mom and how much he appreciated what I did, the littliest effort I tried without having a maid at home to help me to wash, clean up etc.

I overheard him talking to his mom(pretended not to hear!) he told her "Gina is very tired, very worn out. She cannot visit you like she used to have. She does everything herself, mans the store, run the household. And we have no maid. And she still finds time to do little things here and there. So I could rest and sleep very well each night. Not having to worry about things. She kept everything intact. And gave me nothing to think about, nothing to worry"

My mother in law smiled..and she looked at me and said "Gina, le chin ho, aye hiow jia ko kay"..This is my anyhow do pinyin of her teochew words. It means "Gina, you are good, you know how to run the house".

Benny is my mother in law's favourite son. For years, she used to wonder if I could keep the house together and take over her duties to take care of her precious son. Because Benny used to tell her I grew up a spoilt kid, never had to do anything at home.

May 1st, ,2011...The Matriarch says I passed with flying colours

Rain or Shine

2011-04-20T11:33:00.002+08:00

Rain drops keep falling on my head Theme song in the Hollywood Movie "Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid"

I seemed to have run away from blogging. Well, I almost did. My days now are spent waiting for the Sun to come and watching the skies to make sure the rain comes after the clothes are dried.

My domestic helper aka maid has run away sometime last month. She woke up very early in the morning on a Sunday, wash the clothes, hung out to dry and left..the main door was left unlocked. Luckily Benny had woke up at 7am, and left the house. It didn't occur to him that the door was left unlocked..!

By the time I woke up, I noticed the house was super quiet. And I call out to her "Yati" and no reply or response. I search the kitchen, the toilet, the rooms and found her no where in sight. I check her luggage and personal belongings..all intact. And its obvious that she just bolted out and left.

Since it was a Sunday, the maid agency will only be opened after 1pm. I just rang them and left a voice message. By noon, the agency rang me to say that Yati is there with them. I went there later that day to sign her out of my household.! She told the agency that she cannot work for me anymore and she told them I never seems to be satisfied with her work.

The agent told Yati this :

"Your madam has been our customer for 10 years. To date, no maids has come here with problems. All came and went after the contract is over. Her last maid was with her for 4 years. Your madam has a good track record and there were never any high expectations she wanted from anyone. You are the first..so we think you are the main problem here"

Well, I don't want to dwell on this subject anymore. My new maid will come in a week's time..I hope. For the past 4 weeks, we have been living like squatters at home. Food was served in plastic plates or paper disposal plates. To ease with the washing, cleaning. And I cook one dish meals instead of the elaborate 4 course menu.

I spent my mornings waking up to look up at the sky..asking God, "Shine today? or Rain today?". And He answers my prayers knowing how much soiled and smelly clothes I have in my laundry basket. By the time I washed it, hung out to dry..and kept later..the rain would come and cool off the house.

So when it rains, I ironed all the clothes. My girls helped me with the other chores in the house. They would come home from school in the evening to help to feed the pets, cleared their poo/pee and sweep the floor and mop the floors for the whole house.

I would come home late at night around 9pm, have our dinners which my mom cooked for us. And my girls would help us to clean up and wash up.

AMEN for them.

Lately, I have been tired and ill. Natasha took it on herself to help me to wash the toilets..scrubbing down and cleaning it. I told them to bear with the extra work they have to do for another week or so.

I slowed down on my classes this month. Just too much work at home and at work and I don't have time to rest. So the next time it rains, I think that God is giving me a good weather and a signal from Him to say I should slow down and rest. And when the sun comes out, He is telling me to get up and work.

So be it, Rain or Shine, give Thanks to God. For He is good and He endures us forever..AMEN!

A Bag of Flour

2011-03-27T09:39:00.004+08:00

The Candy Man sung by Sammy Davis Jr..one of my favourite songs as a child...!

What do you do with a bag of flour? Most people would use it for baking or mixed into a thick batter to dip seafood and meats for deep frying. That's provided its still all good, before the expiry date. But what if its expired? Most I know would trashed it.

But I would put it to good use..outside food. Since I can't make it edible, at least I can use it for something else.

A Salt Dough. Just flour, lots of salt and water. Mix it all up to form a dough. Leave it aside to settle and then mould it, bend it and shape it. Either you use it to make 'clay' figurines or like play dough for kids, you don't have worry about poisoning should the kids swallow it. Because they won't. Its too salty. Or worry if the ants will come either. Salt is a natural preservative, and this salt dough keeps for a lifetime or until someone breaks it.

This is what I use my expired flour for..I put into a mould which I recently got from Guangzhou. Its a silicone mould, intended for ice sculpture and chocolate moulding. But I bought it for making 3D Fondant figurines instead. Since I had some leftover flour which is near to expiry date, I decided to use it for this purpose.

A pekingese dog which was a favourite with the Chinese Emperor

The Lion Dog which is often seen outside a rich man's house..guarding the gates. This figurine of the lion dog is sitting on a pile of Gold coins.

The mythical Chinese Dragon guarding its Crystal ball...

The dough once taken the form of the mould, was removed and baked in preheated oven at 200C for 30 minutes. So that its dried up and harden. Unfortunately, I only had food colouring at home, no poster paints. So I can't paint these.

Here's the recipe of the salt dough

Ingredients
1 cup of flour(expired, any type of wheat flour )
1 cup of salt(fine salt will do)
60ml to 70ml of tap water

Method:
1. Put flour in a large mixing bowl
2. Add salt to stir and mix
3. Add water and knead into a dough.
4. The dough may feel grainy due to the salt. Now its ready for use.
5. Shape into patterns or roll out on the table like you would with cookie dough.
6. use various cookie cutters to cut.
7. Bake in preheated oven at 200C for 20 mins.

* even if it gets burnt, no worries. No one is going to eat it anyway! Decorate it with oil paints or poster paints. When its dry, paint nail varnish on it to make it shine.

You can use salt dough to make any figurines or even ornaments like bracelets, brooches or any art and craft work you need to make with your kids..

Here's the ice sculpture I did recently..

Why me, Lord?

2011-03-19T15:20:00.003+08:00

Why Me Lord, a hymn sung by The Gaither Vocal Band.

A dear friend of mine recently had a baby. Who isn't due till end of March 2011. But the doctor had to deliver her soon as my friend's blood pressure suddenly shoot till very high. A ultraviolet scan also confirmed that the baby wasn't growing and fearing still birth, she was delivered by c-section. While mom was recovering in her ward, the baby was whisk away in an incubator where she lay and seem to be struggling too.

Words reached me about her untimely birth while I was still in Guangzhou, China for a business. Not knowing head or tail of all that has happened, I only know one thing I could do for her. And that is to pray for them.

A bit of sharing with my friend and me, I found out that her blood pressure went awry due to some family problems. Which I will not relate here because that's too personal. But all I say is that it causes her much anxiety and fear of the unknown.

Now she has been discharged from the hospital but her baby is still in the hospital.Friends rallied around her, praying for her baby. And while I chatted with her online, I told her my own story...

Of once upon a time..some 20 years ago. I was pregnant with Natasha and she was due to be a New Year baby but she came earlier..all because my blood pressure shoot to 220/120. I was rushed to the hospital and the doctor had no choice but to deliver the baby as it was life threatening.

At the operation table, I was under GA..and didn't know anything. But when I came out of it, I found out that I almost died on the operation table. My heart stopped...and I lost much blood. The doctor had to revive me. I remembered overhearing Benny when he spoke to his best friend :

"I don't want to have another child. Seeing how Gina went through, I can have no kids, but I cannot have another wife. She almost died at the operation table.."

Some of the underlying reasons why Natasha and Melody are 8 years apart was also due to this reason. I took a long time to convince Benny that if God saved me once, He will saved me again.

The reason my BP went up so high was that I was working at that time. And overheard my boss saying that he would retrenched me before I give birth so that he doesn't need to pay me 2 months leave(maternity leave). He dragged my probation for almost a year not wanting to confirm my job when he found out I got pregnant. I needed to work, to have an income so I could pay for things, medical and all that. And though Benny could support me, I didn't want to weigh down our family income.

I was retrenched during my confinement month..the first month after Natasha's birth. In my 2nd month, God found me a job and soon after, I went to work. My boss, though single, was a kind man. I worked for him and was loyal to him for over a year until I left and join another company. We remained good friends even after Ieft the company.

And if you think I have forgotten what God has done for me once, yes, I did. After all, I am still human and to make errors like this, happens just too often too. When I had Melody, history repeats itself. But this time, I emerged as a heroine. I put my name down for retrenchment instead..thus saving 2 of my colleagues' jobs in the same company. And having gone through one retrenchment, this time I was much prepared and God proved to me again..

How much more He loved me because He is also the same God who clothed the flowers and feed the sparrows. Melody was born at 33.5 weeks, a premature baby. And I was out of a job again. And again, in my 2nd month of maternity leave, I was head hunted for a Regional Support position in Singapore.

My ex boss was an Irish man..one of the co-founders of Quark Xpress software..the renowned DTP software at that time. He interviewed me, gave me the same salary I had in my last job and God restored everything I thought I have lost when I was retrenched from my previous job.

So this post serves to inspire you. The next time you think of the darkest moments in your life, when the world seems to have collapsed, your life all broken and messed up and you ask "Why me? Lord!"...take a moment and know He was watching and waiting for you to call Him. And when you do, He will come and deliver you for all your pain, your sickness, your sorrows and your tears. And He will wipe each tear from each eye, give you rest for your tired soul and lift you to higher ground.

May you always be reminded that while the world seems to be wasted away...someone up there, up above the clouds, is watching over you and waiting for your call.

Be comforted to know that He cares for you, much more than you will ever know and understand.

Be blessed, be comforted..be inspired.

AMEN!

All the Bliss...

2011-03-17T11:13:00.007+08:00

So Happy Together sung by The Turtles(Group/Band singers)

Finally, my ultimate wedding cake recipe and photo went to print..on a local wedding magazine called "Blissful Brides" at the start of the new year 2011.

Here is the write up(a little on it) from Blissful Brides blog

http://blissfulbrides.sg/blog/?p=702

Here's all the photos I took of the pages in the magazine. If you want to read the full story, go and get the magazine. Its available from Borders, MPH, Cold Storage Supermarkets, Jason's (mostly the town or CBD areas).

Its at Pages 522 to 524. Title of the article was "Baking Your Own Wedding Cake"

They published the photo which Natasha took when we attended Ru-shin's wedding.

The article was written by my baking student who happens to be a guest writer for the magazine. She send me a questionaire sort and I just answer it with loads of references and photos. They re-written it like a story rather than a Sunday Times sort of article where I was interviewed with a Q n A.

The various cakes and photos are not mine. They took it from their stash of good wedding photos. But the Sweet Cherries Fairy Cake photo was from me. Along with the recipe.

I email Ru Shin immediately...she was thrilled..! It was a cake I baked, decorated with lots of love. From the early memories of watching Ru-shin as a child, watching her grow. From a tiny toddler to a beautiful woman. Its almost like watching my own daughter growing up, getting hitched and settling down.

In the article, I shared that every cake you bake, must be treated with lots of love, attention and devotion. As if its a cake you are baking for someone closed to your heart. Even though you are baking for your clients/customers. Because every cake is unique, as every newly wedded couple has a unique love story.

This is why the publishers loved my story...and had it re-written properly with all the right grammer and spelling.

Enjoy..go and get a copy to read.

He Loves me so...

2011-03-07T10:33:00.003+08:00

Jesus Loves Me sung by Marshall Hall, Gaiter Vocal Band

Every child that has gone through Sunday School knows this old hymn.

Jesus loves me! this I know,
For the Bible tells me so.
Little ones to Him belong;
they are weak but He is strong.

Yes, Jesus loves me!
Yes, Jesus loves me!
Yes, Jesus loves me!
The Bible tells me so.

I served in my church for 2 years in the ministry to children. Then I got married, and when I had Natasha, I return to serve the ministry. But Sis Cindy suggested that I join the Ministry to the new-borns..the mini creche in our church is lacking good teachers. And since I became a mother, she figures that I would know instinctively what a baby wants and how to soothe him/her.

I got back to read all my old notes from my night classes at the Singapore Bible College. Where I took the course on Ministry to Children. Our lecturer told us back then, the way to reach out to a new born is just a heart beat away...no loud noises, no loud or jumpy excited worship and praise songs. Just hum...

I remember some years back in mini creche, a lady came with her little baby girl. And we often had to sign in new baby with proper documentation. The mother left her in the crib in the mini-creche, and a bag of things for the baby. Milk powder, diapers, a blanket and some toys. She said she has to go pee..and will be back to fill up the papers. I was busy at the moment, and another fellow sister didn't think it was important and let her go.

This little baby started crying. All the helpers tried to soothe her. But she wouldn't stop crying. I carried her in my arms, closed the door behind me..(we had a nursing room in the mini-creche for mothers to nurse). At one corner of the room, sat a mother with her baby, nursing. I didn't want to disturb her..so I held this little one closed to my chest..so she could hear my heart beat. And then I hum to her...the tune from "Jesus Loves Me"

Slowly, but surely, the baby stopped crying. Though tears still welled up in her eyes, she was calm. I wiped her eyes with a soft tissue and continue to hum to her. And at the same time, I sat in the nursing room, next to the window..and looked at her.

As if she was my very own, I prayed for her. And she fell asleep in my arms. As I lay her down to the crib, I continue to hum that favourite old tune.

I left the room. She slept for a good hour or until the adult service ended. Her mom came by and looked for her baby. But because I wasn't the one who saw her mom, I didn't know who she was. The mother started to panicked when she couldn't find her baby. We had hanging cradle, cribs and beds for all the babies that comes to the mini-creche. She was almost driven to tears and she couldn't find her baby.

Since I was in charge of the mini creche that Sunday, I brought her to the nursing room and ask if that baby girl is hers. The mother saw her baby sleeping peacefully, her blanket covered over her up to her belly, she looked comforted and peaceful. She said :

"she could never sleep on a bed (crib). She needs the cradle( a hanging cloth kind). And further more, she needs to drink before sleeping. She is such a fussy baby. How did you manage to put her on the bed? She never sleeps more than 15 minutes."

And then I told the mother :

"Maybe you didn't see or sense this place. God is here.. Jesus is here. Angels are here, helping us to watch over them. And if you believe in Christ Jesus, you believe that she is safe in His arms and He is cuddling her, rocking her from side to side and singing to her, singing to her soul. All she needs is a daily dosage of God's love."

okay...maybe a bit too superficial here..but as a believer for years, I believe God did that for my own daughters. When I had to cook and be working in the kitchen, I can't tend to baby Natasha all the time. So I prayed and ask God to watch over her while clean the house or prepare food. And because of my faith in Him, Natasha never had any accidents at home..no matter how small it was.

I had knives, scissors, medicine lying around everywhere which is a no-no when you have little crawling toddlers around. It never cross my mind I had to re-furnish or hide things away when Natasha came into our lives.

God was never a visitor or a guest in our house. He was a family member who dwells in our house, in our lives and in every thing we do.

I remembered when Melody was born, barely 3 months old, Benny was hospitalised for Haemorrhage Dengue Fever and Natasha too was hospitalised for Dengue Fever. I didn't catch it because the virus was still residing in me..I had Dengue Fever years before. The day meant I was to rush from one hospital to another. Benny was housed at Changi Hospital and Natasha was at Mt Alvernia Hospital. By the end of the day, I was dead tired and I had to rush home, bathe and washed up and change new clothes before I could nurse Melody.

I remembered it so clearly. And later on, this became a testimony of how God watches us DAILY and all the time.

I was alone in our bedroom. The aircon was turn on, the lights in the room was dimmed. We had a small table lamp at the side of our bed. I carried Melody in my arms, sat on the bed. She was crying..she was hungry. But I was so so dead tired. All I could remember was I sat there with her in my arms and I prayed..

I cried out to God and said I just can't go on anymore. All I want was Benny to recover from dengue because he was at the brink of death. His blood count was low, the blood transfusion didn't seem to work. The doctors told me if he didn't live through that night, I must be prepared for the worst. Natasha was very ill.

I told God I don't know what to do anymore. I just don't. And I felt asleep while praying...I have never been so dead tired in my life before.

I don't know how long I was asleep..but I suddenly woke up in the middle of night..the room still dimmed..and there was this soothing sound I heard. Like in distance, an old hymn I used to hum in church to the little ones I used to care for.

And I realised that my arms were resting on the side of my body...and baby Melody slept on my chest..she didn't fell off my body..and for that split moment, I thought I saw God and He gives me that reassuring sense of well-being that He came and carried baby Melody in His arms while He rested my body and my soul.

I woke up fully..in awe and immediately, I prayed and said Thank You Lord. As always, for being there for me.

I put Melody down to her crib...as I got up, the phone rang. The hospital rang..the nurse on duty that night told me this :

"Mrs Lim, Mr Lim is okay now. some how by some miracle, the blood count went back to normal.We will monitor for a few more hours. If its okay by 10 am tomorrow, he can be discharge the next day"

AMEN! And before I could ring my parents to tell them the good news, Natasha recovered miraculously overnight. In a day, I had to discharge 2 persons closest to my heart. Sis Cindy was there at Mt Alvernia Hospital to help me while I sign the papers for her to be discharged. She took her home for me while I dash off to the other hospital to bring Benny home.

All in a day's work. For us, we think we accomplish so much. But to God, greater good He has done, my faith leapt 100 fold. Restored, renewed and never look back. I will never think about ending or think the world would just end like that anymore.

Miracles do happen and they happen because Jesus Loves You..

AMEN!

By My Faith And I Shall Walk

2011-03-06T08:47:00.007+08:00

With All I Am sung by Hillsong Choir(Gospel)

I think if you have been following my blog since Day 1, you will know I talk about my faith in God(Christianity) all the time. Almost in every post, every line of text. God is mentioned and I find every chance to do it in my line of work too.

When email got popular, I added a line of text called a Signature at the end of all my emails that I replied to others or send out. And that line of text is extracted from the Good News Bible(International Version) and it reads:

"The Lord is my Shepherd. I HAVE EVERYTHING I NEED. Psalms 23:1"

I did this on purpose to put that last sentence in Caps all the way. That verse serves to be a reminder for me every time an email leaves my inbox. And when its replied, I get to read that verse again.

Once a business associate replied to me and said:

"Not everyone I know has the amount of faith you have in your religion. To put that down in every email. But I would to ask, what does those words mean "I have everything I need". Do you have everything you need? I thought everyone is always in need of something"

And I replied :

"It means to me that I am not in want of more. I put that verse in my emails to remind me all the time.

Any more, He is blessing me with Abundance.
Any less, He is teaching me to be contented with all I have.

So in reality, I HAVE EVERYTHING I NEED."

When I started Kitchen Capers forum in July 2004, I just wanted to share information about cooking, baking. I hope the forum help everyone and also myself to learn from each other. And it carried the faith I have with me into the forum too. At the KC Forum, the title reads:

"People Learn from one another, just as Iron Sharpens Iron. Proverbs 27:17"

In everything I do, I put it in prayers. When KC was started, Pastor Kim San, Buay and myself prayed over it. We ask the Lord for a Bible verse to be use for this. Although the site was run and managed by a Christian*yours truly, I never preach the Gospel in the forum. Because the forum was open to everyone, every religion and every faith out there. The purpose was to share, to learn.

I wouldn't allow anyone to mock or spoke ill of any religion. But in fact, we talk about the food we eat that evolved around the various religions we believed in.

When we first open our store in Kallang Bahru, I was literally treading in uncharted waters. My knowledge was slightly above zero point. I knew enough..but not more. I knew what to say to customers asking for things that I don't sell or how to use a certain ingredient I have.

Every day, Benny and I prayed over our store. In our faith, we learn to lean on God for everything. To bring customers to us, to teach us what to say, what to sell and how to sell.

By my faith and I shall walk. While Willie(my brother in law) who works in the store with me is not a Christian, he would often say we needed luck to keep the business going. I often had to remind him that I do not need luck. But I need God instead. Its Him to kept us till today.

I wonder how many Christian-run companies prayed everyday for their business? I know I did. Benny and I did. We prayed everyday. When we check our sales by 7pm, we both Thank God in one voice. Every day, without fail. Even if our sales are bad and we don't even break even. We put our faith in Him alone. We know deep in us, He will provide.

Some days we have no one in our shop. And I will sms Benny and say "Today is very quiet. Let's Pray" and he replied "Yes, God will send angels"

And soon after, people would just appear out of nowhere..and within an hour, our sales hit the jackpot(so to speak). We hit our sales target for the whole day in just 1 hour flat! Just because we believe, just because we have faith in Him.

So many times, this has happened. And we can no longer say its just pure coincident. Whenever we shared about our work with others, we often talk about how God bless us. In our work(the shop), with our children, with my parents, family and relatives. And most of all, with Benny and myself.

In so many ways, He never failed to show me that I indeed HAVE EVERYTHING I NEED. No more, no less.

Have you pray recently?

For yourself? For the work you do with others? For your superior? For your friends or your family members? For that someone who hurt your feelings? Or even for your pets?

Take charge of your life as a Christian. Its been a prayerful life for me. Things will happen when you put your faith in Him. Maybe not as dramatic as the Red sea parted in Moses time or Noah and the great flood that lasted for 40 days and night. But enough to shake your faith in Him alone.

I see my life is full of events, both good and bad. If God has not been in it with me all this while, I know I am not here today. And I know I wouldn't have met Benny.

With each failure, He taught me new skills, how to cope, what to do. How to pick up the pieces and how to mend. And each failure I had to go through in life, He taught me how to share, never to hold back. And in turn, teach others to cope.

Without Christ, my life is a standstill.

With Christ, my cup of joy over runs. Its never enough that I seek more and more of Him each day.

When Benny accepted Christ in 1987, he loved this Christian hymn " Because He Lives, I can face tomorrow" And sometimes in his bad days, he would hummed to the tune of this hymn. And without fail, God will calm him and renew his faith.

And the person who taught him to sing this hymn was Brother Tony Lim, who was also the person who is the MC of our wedding. Brother Tony Lim was a retired Registrar at the Registrar of Marriages in Singapore. When we got married, Bro Tony blessed us with God's words that our lives ahead will be filled with God's blessing for years to come.

Songwriters: Gaither, Gloria; Gaither, William
God sent His son, they called Him, Jesus;
He came to love, heal and forgive;
He lived and died to buy my pardon,
An empty grave is there to prove my Savior lives!

Chorus
Because He lives, I can face tomorrow,
Because He lives, all fear is gone;
Because I know He holds the future,
And life is worth the living,
Just because He lives!

How sweet to hold a newborn baby,
And feel the pride and joy he gives;
But greater still the calm assurance:
This child can face uncertain days because He Lives!

Chorus
Because He lives, I can face tomorrow,
Because He lives, all fear is gone;
Because I know He holds the future,
And life is worth the living,
Just because He lives!

And then one day, I'll cross the river,
I'll fight life's final war with pain;
And then, as death gives way to vict'ry,
I'll see the lights of glory and I'll know He lives!

****

May God Bless each and everyone of you. As you go about life's struggle each day. In good or bad days. He is constantly on watch over you. 24/7, 365 days a year and 366 days in a leap year. Wherever you are, whatever you are doing. Know for now and for sure, He is just a prayer away.

AMEN!

Baby, you can drive my Car..

2011-03-03T10:34:00.005+08:00

Drive my Car sung by The Beatles

Yesterday Benny gave up his Honda MPV and drove home a new car from FIAT Motors. We went to view it soon after Chinese New Year as we have been planning to buy a new car. Couple of things crossed our minds about getting the ideal car.

It has to be big, inside out. Just like the MPV. It must be able to ferry at least 6 persons comfortably behind(not counting the driver and his queen) LOLz! And it must have leg-room, it must have room for our stock and stuff, shopping bags and to fit our dog Jing Jing.

Tall order?? Maybe. He took a day's leave last week and took me out on a window shopping spree..to shop for a car. Okay, I can't drive, never will. Due to my knee injury years ago which I had surgery done on it. I could never run due to this injury. I could not even kneel. My left knee is swollen to this date. My right seems normal. Sometimes I walk with a limp. When I get out of a car, my left knee comes out first..but it could not stand..several nerve ending on it have been severed. If I put pressure on it, I won't feel anything, but I may fall because its weak. With age, its worse.

For a long time, Benny has been my chauffeur, if he can't, he gives me money for taxi. And he once told Natasha that when she is old enough, he will pay for her driving lessons. And when she passes her tests and certified to be driver, one of the things she must promised is always to be there at my beck and call..to drive me around.

Even when we were dating, and I have to go home myself after meeting him(as he has to go back to work) he would never allow me to take a bus. He would wait in line for a taxi with me and send me off with money in my hands to pay for the journey home.

So when he said he wants me to tag along to view a car, I told him :

"I can't drive. I don't know anything about cars. I am just a passenger in it. You go and choose what you like, make sure its comfortable for the driver. That's important."

But Benny said :

"Buying a car is like buying a second home. Everything I buy or do, you are a part of it. I want you to come and see."

So off we went..and saw this car. There were 2 models, a cheaper one and a more costly one. He was trying to save money but I could see that he didn't like it very much. The driver seat area was cramp and small. After much test driving at the showroom, I pull him aside and said

"Ben, buy the bigger one. the more expensive one. You are the one driving, you must feel good about it. If you are happy, I am happy. Sure, its more expensive. We can scrimp and save a bit here and there. At our age, we should live like half a millionaire, not a full pauper."

So its settled..we signed, sealed the deal and bought a FIAT Doblo 1.6cc. The interior was Maroon..the dash board, etc. KC corporate colour. The car will be Metallic Silver. And it will be registered to me..aka Kitchen Capers. Our very first company car.

A proud moment for us..our first shop in May 2009, our first Company car by March 2011.

Here's how it looks like :

Outside my mom's place..we drove it there to show her.

Parked downstairs of our apartment..

The registration shows Kitchen Capers..but I blur out the address as it shows our residence address. KC was registered in the beginning as a SOHO(Home Business). A year later we open shop.

Incidentally, I noticed that our car plate reads as GBC 722k. Jokingly I told Benny its a short name for "Gina Benny Car"

Growing Up..

2011-03-01T14:08:00.006+08:00

FootLoose by Kenny Loggins..performed in the hit musical Foot Loose

I grew up in the 60s when all the R & B, Rock n Roll songs were on the rave on the radio everywhere. I can't remember how old I was back then, but when my Uncle Daniel was 21 years old, he had a smashing party. Uncle Daniel told us he was a member of a rock band in his younger days. My mom use to tell us he had a long queue of girl friends.

Here's the old foto in Black n white:

That's me on the left, the dress I wore was hand sewn by my mom. Shocking pink..! I remembered. My cousin John, on my side. And uncle Daniel..the star in his party. There were so much dancing, I remembered. We danced anyhow, any way we liked. Of course, its always been me and John..my soul mate from my childhood days.

I grew up in those early years exposed to songs, and music all the time. My dad loves the movies from Hollywood so I had a fair share of Hollywood celebrities and only watch a movie if a celebrity is in it.

My relationship with my relatives are very close. My uncle Daniel was more uncle than anything else. He was my confidante and my friend. He allowed me to fiddle with his music tapes and his musical equipment, the stereos, the sound system. Seen here in another old foto with Uncle Daniel and me...

Now I am all grown, and whenever we have parties, its often celebrated in full swing and with Uncle Daniel too.

And I tell myself one day when I am old enough to be a mother, I would like to be my children's best friend where we shared movie tips and music we loved together.

Natasha is my first born, with whom we shared the same love for the same kind of music and the same movie flicks too. I used to watch musicals with her and also watch the same teenage love romance movies too. We all go ga-ga over Johnny Depp. But I was the first to discovered Johnny Depp in Edward Scissorshands and later as his role as Captain Jack Sparrow in the series of Pirates in the Carribean. Then Natasha grew to love Johnny Depp and became one of his loyal and devoted fan in Asia. We watched all the old musicals together, over and over again. First as a family, then with her friends. From Oliver! to My Fair Lady, then to West Side Story and then to Grease. I would tell her stories of the days I watch these in my younger days.

Melody is my youngest daughter. She on the hand, follows what her sister watches..and so in a way, in tune with what I grew up watching and listening.

Melody is 12 going on 13 years old this year. She is all into 'older guys'. While her peers are watching teen movies and going ga ga over young boys, she, on the other hand was going for older men. She said they look more "hot" and more mature than all the childish boys her age.

At my age..almost hitting 50 years now..I moving backward in time. I am watching all the teen romance movies, dramas and Melody is watching all the older guys version. So I figure that she and I will meet halfway..! LOLz..

On late nights, we fought over the DVD player as I wanna watch Vampires Diaries Season 1 again and she wanna watch Bones Season. I often had to give in..and end up laughing and teasing the characters in the series with her.

Photo from the NET: Cast of Vampire Diaries

Photo from the NET : Cast of Bones (many seasons!)

Lately, she ask me about X Files with Scully and Mulder as in one of episodes in Bones, Booth talked about Agent Mulder and Scully. So I told her the plot is similar..an agent(Mulder is a guy) with Scully(the scientist) investigating strange or weird police cases that involve murder of the unnatural kind..more alien beings than supernatural vampire sort fiction. Along the long Seasons(many many episodes) both of them have feelings for each other but stubborn to admit it. Just like with Bones and Booth. Some under the mistletoe's and some kiss scenes here and there..the usual stuff.

You should see her eyes light up..and she ask : "Is it worth watching ? Do you think I can get the DVDs?"

And I said :

"Mulder is a little hot and handsome in his role in the drama. Scully is not pretty, nor sexy and I think her face is like a block head, too square. So now you are into Bones and Booth, comparatively, Mulder is not your type and Scully, is a sad story..!"

and Melody said

"ya ya, mom..I watch one episode of them in youtube..ya, Scully is square!...nah--..I don't think I wanna watch it. If you say its not nice"

She started on Bones after I told her about Bones. Since then, she is raving about them all the time. She would tell me about the show, and tell me about how Bones is or how Booth was in the show. And I know..and I was the only person who could relate to her and we shared a common thing. Because I was a loyal follower of Bones when it was first aired on Channel 5 at 11pm every Monday some years back. So I know the plot at the back of my hand.

We promised not to make fun of each other..of me watching teenage romance and for her to watch adult romance.

A long time ago, I have learned to loosen my apron strings. I don't hold on so tightly to it anymore. My girls proved to me that letting go was the right way to teach a child to behave. They never failed me and are honest and truthful about everything.

And I hope this goes on for a lifetime..and in time for them should they become parents to their own kids.

Thank God for my uncles..William(now in Canada), Daniel, Andrew and David(all in Singapore), for all my aunts who watches and loved me..cared for me all my days.

Mending Lil Hearts

2011-02-28T09:12:00.003+08:00

How Can You Mend a Broken Heart by The Bee Gees

My good friend AV and I shared many things. Friendship, good food, recipes of our family and prayers. We are both Christians, and though the miles separates us, we kept each other in prayer. For good things, and for bad. She lives in California, USA now. With her husband, her daughter and her family. Over the past year, she shared with me of the tears she has wept silently for her daughter and her grand children. Because her daughter is going through divorce and breaking the family.

I remembered some years back she told me that she is packing up to move to USA. To live with her daughter, her son-in-law and the children. Because she hopes to help them to take care of the kids while they go out to work. AV has an apartment in Singapore where she lives with her husband. She comes back to Singapore every year and we would find time to meet up, to chit chat and catch up too.

Of late, she tells me about things at home. Moving house, moving out of the home that her daughter and ex-husband used to live together..making it perfect for their children. Now, its broken. Left, right and center.

While many would pray for the families and helping them to cope in a foreign country, I said my prayers for her grand children instead. As it reminded me of the many little hearts I had to help to mend.

The children suffered more when parents are divorced. Before Kitchen Capers and even before Benny, I use to be a counsellor with my church..to kids from broken homes, broken families. Its painful to see them. They don’t cry, because they don’t understand what is happening. And if they cry, their tears are not wiped from their hearts. Its a life long trauma for some of them which they carry with them all through their lives. Some do get healed, some don’t. In their broken-ness, some of them found God. Only He can healed them. Some didn’t.

My church send me for a professional Counselling course at The Singapore Bible College. Although I was trained to be one, I dabbled on the side when I used to serve in Sunday School as a teacher there. I have always loved children. Broken or whole. The word "Broken" here means Hurt emotionally, not physically.

I find children between 2 to 5 years of age are the most difficult age to 'mend'. They are too young to understand the adult world and why things happen and why their parents argue all the time. Not that when they are older, they understand better. But explaining to them even in layman or kid's tone, its very difficult. Each child is unique. Each child mends in a different way.

Some will take alot of soul searching, some look like they already healed. No one knows till their character shows up.

And if they cry, you know they are starting to heal. Its only when they don't, the pain seems un-mendable. If there is ever such a word "un-mendable". I have seen a boy aged 3 going on 4 years old going through his parent's initial stages of divorce. He cannot understand why and what. There are questions he wanted to ask them but afraid to do so. He would hear them shouting at each other all the time. When he comes near them, they kept quiet for a while but chided each other all the time. He went on, not able to understand what is happening and why it was happening.

I remembered he came to my class in Sunday School. He was a bright boy. During class, he listened attentively, and would do all the arts and crafts with so much joy. But when we sat down to pray, he would be silent. And when all the children are supposed to say "AMEN", he would not say it. But I could see the pain in him. Somehow he was trying to reach out to God.

I had time which I took and spent with him. Just him and me. In the garden behind our church. I would tell him things I liked and things I hate just to draw him out of his shell. He wouldn't talk. Sometimes he look like he was thinking of something else. Sometimes he would just sit there, on the swing with me. Quiet, forlorn. I prayed for him all the time. Because I don't know what is wrong. He wouldn't tell me. He wouldn't talk. And it hurts me so much to see him like that.

We spent many Sunday afternoons after church in the garden behind our church. I remembered I used to hum to him that good old Kid's praise by Psalty "Say To the Lord I love you". Then one sunday, I taught the kids to sing a new song..and it was this song

Say to the Lord I love you..

Suddenly from behind, he would dash across the hall and rush up to me at the stage. He snatch the microphone from me and started singing "I love you, I love you, say to the Lord I love you!"

We all clapped for him, because all of us who has been his Sunday School teacher never heard him speak, much less sing. After the praise session, I took him aside. It was then he opened up and pour out all his hurt, his pain and all his tears to me.

And he told me what happen. And in his child like manner he said to me..and those words followed me all my years after that. And every time I hear of someone who is going through divorce and they had little kids at home, my heart goes out to the little ones, than to the adults. This is what he said to me : (his name is Dwayne. He should be in his early 30s now)

"Aunty Gina, my mama and my papa doesn't love me anymore. because Dwayne is naughty. Dwayne go to kindy school and come back and mama and papa fight and shout. mama sleep one room, papa never come home to sleep. Dwayne sometimes sleep with ah ma(granny). Mama never talk to Dwayne anymore. Dwayne try to be a good boy. Aunty Gina pray every Sunday, thank God and say Amen. Dwayne don't want to say Amen because God make mama and papa sad and angry everyday. Dwayne don't want to thank God. God is no good."

I cried when he said that. And when he saw my tears, he started to cry too. And he said to me :

"Aunty Gina love Dwayne or not? Dwayne don't say AMEN but Dwayne keep the colour pencils and the art book. Dwayne help Aunty Gina to keep the bible and the chairs. Dwayne has no friend. "

I spend many Sundays mending him. Reassuring him that God loves us all. And got the help from our church pastors we went to see his parents. We didn't fix the divorce but his parents came to an understanding and kept their cool and pretended to be happy with each other just to put him back on track. But deep down, his parents still hate each other. But for their son to heal, they have to work together for him.

Dearest Dwayne,
I do not know what becomes of you now. I knew after the church spoke to your parents and they make good of things for you. You did well in school, became 'normal' and happy again. You have taught me so much about understanding, about loving someone and caring for someone. Aunty Gina is still the same person. Maybe older. But wiser. And all the years, I have not stopped praying for you. And if you are reading my blog by chance, I hope to meet you again.

**
In many ways, I never ask that my girls follow my footsteps or do what I do. But God spoke to Natasha somehow..and now Natasha reaches out the little hearts in the church she worships at. And she now studies Psychology in the university. She hopes to graduate and practice that...to mend hearts..and to renew someone's soul.

on the side note, I have met the little hearts I mended over the years. Young ladies, young men. Aspiring youths. I quit counselling after my girls went to school. And when I started Kitchen Capers, I continue to share. Not just recipes of food lost in time but also love for the lost.

May you find comfort knowing God hears you from where you are. And when you thought to yourself "Where is God when it hurts?". He's there...He never push His way into you, but silently behind you, supporting and waiting for you. Sending Angels in your way in things you do every day. Dropping love in places and things you never thought would appear.

God Bless you..AMEN!

Just You & Me...

2011-02-20T04:02:00.004+08:00

Tea for Two, sung by Doris Day.

Yesterday I had a class at home. It was a class on Baking of American Carrot Cupcakes and Ice Cream Cupcakes. I had intended to start early and end early so that I could share a 10 minute cooking session with one of the students. She lives near my home and a delight to know her as she would often help me when I had classes. Its my way of saying "Thank you" and to appreciate the time she took to come early and help me with my classes.

She is newly married, a young and dutiful wife. Living in her first matrimony home with her hubby. On a separate email she briefly told me she was struggling to cook a curry chicken dish to please her hubby. But failed terribly. The chicken had more taste of curry powder and something doesn't seem right. She said she followed the recipe to the dot and couldn't figure out what went wrong.

So I decided to teach her how to do a quick 5 minute curry chicken with the curry paste I made recently. Claire was pleasantly surprised and didn't expected that I had plan this for her. I also taught her a trick or two how choosing the best cut of chicken for this.

Then she tells me that ever since she started cooking at home, her hubby has gained weight. Ever since she started her first baking class with me last year, it started a sudden interest and love in cooking too. Because I tend to side track sometimes if I see a student who wants to learn to cook. I get all too eager to share the knowledge.

When her hubby came by to pick her up, we talk a fair bit. They shared with me that they are intending to get a dog for their home. And I shared with them on basic dog training too. Claire was impressed with the way I trained and raised my dog, Jing Jing to be well behaved and obedient.

When they left my place, it reminded me of the early days with just Benny and me. Just him and me. When I first got married, when we had our first home. Just the two of us. And soon after, Benny bought me a puppy, a male shetland sheepdog named Fable. Mainly it was to keep me company when I come home each night to an empty house. As he often worked late. I have Fable to keep my company. To play with and to watch sad movies with.

Just like my student, Claire and her hubby. Just starting out..a home build on love. A puppy to fill up the void of days when one is away on work or duties outside.

I remembered so much on the days I struggled to cook. I had no one to tell me how and what. My mom was a phone call away. I learnt mostly by trial and error. So to hear what Claire had to share with me of her cooking adventures at home, it reminded me of my early days as Mrs Lim.

And I assured Claire that the power of Love does wonders to a person. How Love changes me. My mom couldn't change me. Its so obvious that Claire is so much in love. Seeing her and her hubby reminded me everytime how much I have grown from a person who can't boil water to cook instant noodles to one now who cooks and bakes to feed others.

She took this class was because her hubby loves American Carrot Cake with cream cheese frosting.

The American Carrot Cupcake..though not the one that Claire did. This was baked/decorated by another student when I first taught this at Robinsons, last December.

And I realised too, in all my years of teaching others to cook or bake, how many young women I have taught, both newly married or single but spoken for. Because I don't just teach them to cook or bake, I also impart my love for my family and how love is spread through the things we do so willingly for the people we love.

In that 30 minutes or so, I taught Claire to cook the dish I made last week for my girls ...this is what I did last week :

Butter Garlic Rice, Grilled Djorn Mustard Chicken, Char-grilled shitake mushrooms..some veggies on the side. Top with Mascaprone Cheese whipped with Mandarin Oranges..

One Day I will Fly Away...

2011-02-11T11:42:00.004+08:00

One Day I will Fly Away sung by Nicole Kidman from the musical "Moulin Rouge"

From as far as I can remember, my mom would tell me 1001 things to relate things I did with life's real examples. So that I can understand and I can learn. She did all that in the ability she knew to make me behave. As a child, I listened to her all the time. Occasionally, I misbehaved and she never fails to spare the rod.

For years I wonder if you could spare the rod and yet not spoil the child? Because it was taught from the earliest of time that if you spare the rod, you spoil the child.

When I became a mother, suddenly all these came back to me. But God has been very good to me and blessed me with an easy kid to care for. Natasha was my first born. And she was a good little kid. And never gave us any trouble. She was easy to train and educate and the easiest kid to feed too. She would eat anything we put in her mouth. At a young tender age, she was found to be lactose intolerant so she went on a soy-based milk formula till she turned 2 years old. By then, she was gamed to try anything.

My mom often talked to Auntie Katherine who lives in CA, USA and ask for tips on what baby food to cook for Natasha. Auntie Katherine raised 2 fussy eaters on her own and shares her tips eagerly.

Natasha had a mix of western and chinese meals in her diet. By noon she had double boil plain porridge served with diced carrots and fish fillets. By dinner, she had pot roast and potaotes all mashed up into baby food. By the time she was old enough to sit at the dinning table with us, she started to have a taste of all kinds of food and a mix of flavours and taste.

She was in many ways my role model...who would have thought that a young child be a role model? I would. She was my role model because I would use her as an example on how you should train your kid and how to feed your child. As I was also serving in our church's Children's Ministry, I shared this with the young parents too.

By the time she was 4 years old, she had her first taste of Spicy Laksa and loved it. Minus the fresh cockles as we do not know how it would react in her. When she was 5 years old, we took her to USA and fed her all kinds of food and drinks. By then she was gamed for anything and everything.

When Melody was born, I use the same method of education on her. It worked..! Although Melody was more of a handful to care for, it did show that the role model's way was still intact.

That you should start them young..before they start tasting how the world is like and be 'pressured' to think that kids are with junk food, adults eat boring stuff.

Food is never boring at home. With Melody, I got her into the kitchen and getting her hands into whipping up dishes the way she likes it. That way she appreciates it and looks forward to meals at home.

But its a different thing when we dine out. Although they will eat anything, they are often looking for new things to try. Its a rule in the family that when our girls are old enough (that's when they are like 4 years old and above) we do not dictate what they should or can eat while we dine out.

However, at home, Benny decides the menu for the week and we just gladly eat what he wants. The whole idea was more for us to dine together as a family. From young, I do not allow my girls to have 'buffet' like meals. Means they pick up their plates, picks and choose the food and dash off to the living room for a TV movie. Meals at home are often a sit-down affair. Its here that we talk about the days' events, share our love across the table and in between that, the family dog gets a nibble of table scraps.

This is an old photo of Melody savouring every last bite from the chicken. This was taken in 2003.

When my shop was opened, I spent less time at home cooking. So if there are days I could be home to cook for the family, its like having Reunion Dinner every time. The family misses these special moments. And now we all treasured these dinner meals at home more often than ever.

May you have a blessed Valentine's Day ahead..!

Happy Talk

2011-01-31T08:50:00.004+08:00

Happy Talk sung by Junita Hall from the movie "South Pacific"

When I was a kid, I didn't have many dreams of things I wanna be or to do. I have no ambition. One day in my secondary school, our English teacher ask us to think about our ambitions and what we want to be when we grow up. She wants us to write an essay on it. I went home, disillusioned and I didn't know what I want to do. Because I saw myself as a failure. I couldn't do many things. Due to my medical history, I couldn't run or play like everyone does. I became an introvert and stayed at home all the time. I don't mingle with my peers, nor read the books they read or watch the movies they did.

So I went home, and told my dad about that difficult essay I had to write. I told him I didn't know where to start writing because I have no dream, no point of interest to start it off.

My dad told me :

Start talking about happy things, things you like to do. Forget about the essay for now. Its when you talk about happy things, you know what you want to do. Remember that song they use to play over the Radio ? Happy Talk ?..this is how it goes :

Happy talk, keep talkin' happy talk,
Talk about things you'd like to do.
You got to have a dream,
If you don't have a dream
How you gonna have a dream come true?

This is the many reasons why I loved my dad. He belongs to the generations of fathers who are often the sole breadwinners in any family household. Who spent all their time working and feeding the family. Who is the figure head at home and delegates duties. But my dad was different. Besides all these, he played an important role in shaping me. In helping me to see what I am and what I can be if I try a little harder.

My dad told me once that I had to try all the jobs I could land myself in. So that I have an idea of what I can be, what I can't be. Because life itself is a journey. A journey of wonders. And it will only end when you stop breathing...or when your life has come to an end.

Fast forward to today...what I have become? What have I done? Many many many things...My dad will be 79 years old this August 2011. Yet he has not stop trying new things or learning new things. I know he has picked Banjo playing, and could read Hebrew and he is learning Greek now. My dad is an inspiration to me..that life goes on, dreams can be fulfilled if you start on it.

Many people envied me of my work, my shop and my classes. Some wrote to me and chatted with me online asking me to mentor them. While many thinks I am a super woman who seem to have time for everything. Others wondered where I found the energy to do so many things in a day.

My answer is always the same..."Happy Talk..talk about the things you like to do.." Its the thing that keeps me going, each day. I enjoy doing the things I did every day. That enough gives me boundless energy.

So start dreaming for a while...

Tiger, Tiger in the soup...

2011-01-29T09:18:00.003+08:00

At home, we are not beer drinkers. So when I got a carton of Tiger Beer(part of a hamper stash from my supplier), I wanted to try to cook with it. In the past, I have used beer to cook with crabs, with beef and it works great. This time, I wanted to cook it with soup. I should have done this last year when it was the Year of the Tiger. But never late than ever, you have this anytime of the year. Especially so when the weather was cold in the last couple of days due to heavy down pour over the island.

I cook this using the simple ingredients I can find in my kitchen pantry. And also wanted to cook it with the pickled Garlic I have made. The girls loved it..said the soup was sweet and the beer flavour was mild. The soup smells like beer. The chicken was tender and had a hint of beer in it. I added sichuan peppercorns to mellow the overall taste of beer.

Here's my tried n tested recipe...

Tiger Beer Chicken Soup
Recipe by Gina Choong

Serves 2
Ingredients
2 chicken thigh, deboned, skin intact
1 pickled garlic
1 tsp sea salt
1 tsp szechuan peppercorns
1 can of Tiger Beer(Cold from the fridge)

Method
1. Slice garlic thinly.
2. Cut up chicken into thick chunks.
3. Heat up wok with 1 tbsp of cooking oil
4. Add garlic to saute till the sides turn slightly brown and crispy
5. Add chicken and stir fry over high heat for 3 mins.
6. Add beer, szechuan peppercorns, salt to cook till it boils.
7. Cover the wok and simmer over medium heat for 10 minutes.
8. Turn off fire, dish out and serve warm.

Great on its own..!

Pickled Garlic
Recipe by Gina Choong

Ingredients
10 pcs of China fragrant garlic, peeled
500ml red glutinous rice wine (if not, use a good Chinese Rice Wine)

Method
1. Wash and peel away the skin of the garlic.
2. use a large glass jar, pour wine into it.
3. Add garlic into and make sure the wine covers all of it.
4. Cover and leave it to soak overnight in the fridge.
5. By the next day, its ready for use.

Storage
As long as the garlics are soak in the liquid, it keeps indefinitely.
This liquid can be reuse several times.

Do not throw away the wine liquid.

Chances are...

2011-01-28T11:36:00.006+08:00

Chances Are sung by Vonda Shepherd and Robert Downing Jr from the drama serial "Ally McBeal"

I thought I would never be able to talk about this ever again. A blast from the past came back to me recently while talking to a friend about failed marriages and the break down in such.

Many many years ago, when I just started coming out to work after leaving school. I just finished my 'A' Levels exams and started work in a large multi-national company in Singapore. I was in IT or back then it was called EDP which stands for Electronic Data Processing. In today's terms, its just Computing..! I worked late shifts and because the company I was with was in retailing. We had to visit the stores by night after the store has closed for the day. I had to deal with the security and make friends with them so I don't have to surrender my IC name to them and fill up so many forms just to stay in the store after store hours.

In the midst of my work, I met him. I shall leave his name out here on my blog. And I shall just call him here as MrX or Mr X. He was an ex-cop with the Singpaore Police Force. He wasn't that old a man to retire but he decided to leave the Force while he was in his early 40s so he could still find work outside.

He runs and heads the Security Dept in our company. I had to get his approval in writing to be at different stores by night every week. Its thru this I met him and befriended him. MrX, by and large was a good man. Work-wise, he goes by the book and followed all the proper protocols in work. Off duties, he was fun to be around with. Jovial and funny, all around nice guy. All the ladies in the company liked him.

When the company opened a new store, he and I are like partners in crime..we were seen working side by side. He checks on store's security, I check on all the computers and security to prevent theft, staff pilferage, etc. Its inevitable that our friendship grew from just office colleagues to a new level.

He started dating me. At that time, I wasn't with anyone or have not met Sidney either. So I was young, single and AVAILABLE!! We went out on a group with the office crew..for lunch or dinner. And went on single dates with each other after work. He would see me safely home after each store's visit which is often after midnight.

But somehow, something wasn't right. I just couldn't put a finger to it..so I ask my mom. She said that even boyfriends came from God. That I should seek God and ask if this is the one for me. And so I did...prayed about it for days and weeks over it. At the same time, I enjoyed the time we spent together.

Then it had to happened...my supervisor (a guy) told me he saw MrX with a woman and a young child. They seemed to be quite close and he carried the kid for a while. And joked and laughed with the woman. They were seen in one of our retail stores. So one night I ask MrX about this.. he was taken aback and a bit shocked. And then he said :

"Oh...that's my sister with my nephew. They came to the store to buy things and needed my staff card for Staff Discount. My nephew is very close to me. Whenever I see him, I would carry him. "

And so I believed him. And I apologised to him for mistaking it as something else. After that incident, I stopped listening to such 'rumours' about him from my supervisor. Because at the same time, my supervisor had a crush on me too. So I would like to think that he is saying things to hurt us.

But because we didn't want the whole company to tease us, we kept our relationship private. Outside the office, after office hours. We would be seen leaving the office at different times and end up meeting each other at a central location. This went on for a few months.

Until one day I happened to be in the office early in the morning and got to hear 'things'. The office girls were in the store and they were all gossipping about MrX. So I went to eavesdrop on their conversation. In the midst of it all, I heard that he is applying for a 2 weeks leave from work, bringing his wife and son for a cruise to the Maldives. I was shocked with disbelief and I still wanted to think that people are saying things to hurt me.

So I started to do my own mini investigation. I ask around..and to my horror, I found out that MrX was indeed a married man with a loving wife and a young son aged 4 years old.

So I plucked up all my courage and confronted him. And then he said :

"I love my wife and my son. I would never leave them. My fling with you is just something I call a break from home and from work. I have never intended for us to be together for life. And you wouldn't have gone out with me if you haven't had a certain liking for me. And you are not a kid or under aged in any way. Should we end up in bed, its consensual.. and I didn't force you to do anything"

ok...a step backwards..What do you think I did?

I slapped him hard. And I remembered telling him this:

"You are a coward and a bastard! You cheated on your wife the moment you lust over another woman. You also cheated me of my feelings. How can you say you loved your wife when you are going out with me? I should have listen to my supervisor. I heard things about you and confronted you. Remember? If you are truthful to your wife and to me and you never intended to hurt me, you should have come clean about your marriage and your wife and son. But instead you told me a lie."

And I stopped seeing him soon after and I also apologised to my supervisor for not believing in him.

After this incident, I became extremely wary of men in general. I buried myself in my work and stopped going out or saw anyone that was of the opposite sex. And even if I did, it was just fun and play and I couldn't bring myself to have any feelings for any guy.

If I have not met Sidney, I would have not met Benny either. It was Sidney who brought some hope in me that Love is still a many Splendid thing.

And so now when I look back, I see that all these things happened for a reason. It happened so that I learnt. So that I know. My conscious is clear. Involving with a married man is the greatest taboo as a Christian. I surrendered to God the day I found out MrX was married. And I ask that God forgive me. It took me many years to come into grips with that. Because I was a staunch Christian and to be with a married man was not something I am proud of.

But God kept me safe and He kept me from making more mistakes. So when I met Sidney and later Benny, I had to be sure. But God has blessed me with Benny. Who kept his promise to me to be true and honest. I think I did great in God's eyes. Because He gave me Benny.

ps.. I was only 18 years old when I met MrX.

Master of All

2011-01-24T10:36:00.005+08:00

You are my First, my Last, my Everything, sung by Barry White

Ok, this song has nothing to do with my post. But I really like this song! Especially when its performed in the drama serial :Ally McBeal in the unisex toilet in the law firm.

I have always had a jug of Master Sauce in my freezer. Its been in there for almost 12 years now. I have stayed here at Hougang Avenue 7 since 1995, and had this sauce in my old place. When we shifted homes, I was too worried about my sauce that all my other possessions which was packed and ready to go. So I left the whole jug of sauce to my Uncle Andrew. When we finally settled down in our current home, uncle Andrew didn't know he was to return the sauce, he use it for his cooking and food.

So I had to start cooking it again. There are many stories about the Master Sauce. And possibly a 1001 recipes too. Each Chef or cook will probably have his or her own version. I would like to think of it as the authentic Indian Garam Masala which Prashant used to tell me..of every household has their own blend of spices to make up the Garam Masala. So in every Chinese home, we should have our own blend of Master Sauce.

A Master sauce is created over a period of time. Just like good vintage wine, it can take years to reach the full flavour. Its often made of the simpliest of ingredients found in every Chinese kitchen :

Dark Soy Sauce
Light Soy Sauce
Cinnamon bark or sticks
Star Aniseeds
Cloves
Water

As to variations, like how much of each ingredients, greatly depends on what's on the menu for the day. What are you using it to cook with.

I started making my Master Sauce sometime late 1997, around the time I was pregnant with Melody, my youngest daughter. And marked the date of its 'creation'. Mainly just so that I remembered how long it would take me to make the sauce.

The Master sauce was cooked or boiled over the stove and each time I would add a whole duck or a whole chicken to cook. once the meat is cook, I will remove the sauce, scoop out a bowl or two for dipping or to add to the meat dish. The rest will be kept in a jug and straight into the freezer.

Each time I needed to cook a braised meat dish, I would take out this Master Sauce, thawed it. And add water, the spice herbs to boil and cook the meats again.

And then repeat the process each time. After 12 to 15 rounds of cooking it with duck or chicken or pork, you will get a good base...and thus the birth of the Master Sauce.

My mom used to tell me that the hawker who sells the Teochew Braised Duck guards this Master Sauce like gold. Its not a recipe that is to be sold to the highest bidder and should the old man passed away or retires, he would pass the sauce to the next generation. Even if the family decides not to sell this dish anymore, the sauce was to be kept in the family household kitchen and kept 'alive' by re heating it, using a portion each time for braised food cooking at home.

I hope the day will come for me to pass my Master Sauce, divided into 2 portions for both of my daughters. This is what I use for Master Sauce for :

You can find all the recipes at my KC Forum.

Been There, Done That!

2011-01-09T09:04:00.004+08:00

I Left my Heart at San Francisco sung by Tony Bennett

So many times you have heard someone say : " Yes, I been there and done that!". I have always wanted to be like that..to say to someone that I have been there and done this or that. At least I tried my best to live my life to the fullest and the best I can be and without any regrets. That I have been there and done that. Even if it was unsuccessful, at least I can look back in wonder and be thankful that I was given the chance to do so.

Ever since I started this journey to teach outside my home, my days are filled with only work. I don't have time for family or for my friends. Which is something I treasured dearly. Despite having to run the retail shop, I was able to find time to sit back and relax sometimes and juggle time with my girls and Benny too.

The last straw came on Christmas Eve, a celebration we have at home with our extended family. I was tired and drained and my Uncle Daniel saw it through me. And he gave me sound advice on how I should tackle it. Even when I was having Roast turkey and baked salmon, I was thinking about work. My mind couldn't rest, though my body was weak, I couldn't sleep well at all.

But it is also thru this journey I found a soul mate which I thought was just my better half in many ways. Benny has always supported me in each and every way and every step I take in all my dealings with everyone outside. He knew me inside out and possibly more than I thought he would. He told me not to go ahead with the project to teach outside and I wouldn't listen to him.

I told him : "Let me try. If I succeed, I knew you will be credited for this. If I don't, at least I know I tried and I can leave the City of Regrets behind."

And true enough, I didn't succeed. I spent all my time struggling and making things work. I spent so much time pleasing everyone and in the end I neglected my shop which is the life line that holds us together.

Like a burden lifted off my shoulders, I decided to call it Quits with my project with Robinsons. Suddenly, my asthma just disappeared, my sleepless and unrestful sleep that eludes me for months left me too. I was able to sleep better each night at 12 midnight instead of 3 am or 4am each day.

I lost my fire and my 'fizz' in the things I do and I didn't realise it till Benny tells me. Above all, the last straw came when I couldn't be there when Melody needed me to go and buy shoes and stuff when school reopens early this week. Last school holidays which stretch from mid November to end December, I didn't spend a day with her just to go to the movies or just hung out with her to do our Mother and Daughter thing.

And she said to me "Mommy, it is okay. I know you are busy. I just go with Jie Jie..."

It tore me inside out. And I felt so upset about it. And when I look back, I realised that even in my most busy periods in 2009 with Christmas and New Year, I found time to spend with Melody at the movies, just to do window shopping or even just to eat junk food with her.

And she felt the pinch too..and a loving child I have, she followed me to one of my classes at Robinsons. The so called make up lost time we have is make up at Robinsons.

That's me...on the left and my dear Melody by my side...

And Natasha helped me by running the shop for me whenever I teach. My 2 daughters are the BEST. And I thank God for them all the time. In more ways than none, my priority in life evolves around them.

I will continue with my classes at home..and possibly at Robinsons too. As and when they needed me. Its not goodbye, but good bye for now and see you later again..

A Start of the New Year

2011-01-01T16:46:00.003+08:00

Thank You Lord, (hymn) sung by Don Moen

My cousin, John now lives in Vancouver, Canada with his wife Katherine and their 2 boys. He was someone very close to me, very close to my heart. Someone I loved since young. In every photo of past, there is always a boy next to me. And that will be John. Or Hwee Hwee as I affectionately call him. And he would call me by my Chinese name and that was Ting Ting. And everyone in our big extended family would sometimes tease us and call us a couple. When I move, he moves, when I sit, he sits. When I eat my dinner, he ate his. For years we grew up side by side. His parents doted on me as if I were their own child. We would play together and learn together.

But Hwee was very smart, intelligent and also untidy. I was on the other hand, spoilt silly at home. And also untidy. But the funny thing was that when I am with him, I am extremely different. I was always nit picking on things and I tidy up his room for him. Packed his bags and tidy up his books and neatly arranged everything in order.

Today, he wrote a note in FaceBook to reflect on the past year 2010. On the things he did, both personal and work wise. About himself as a husband to his wife, as a father to his 2 boys and as a son to his parents. He noted that he could have been better as a husband, father and son. And wished he could have done more now.

I replied to his note and said this to him :

"AMEN! I have lived my early childhood filled with happiness and joy because you were a part of my life. I have always wished to have a younger brother but God gave me you instead.

And though we are separated now by the miles between us, I have always looked out for you in more ways that you will know.

And in all my prayers for our family abroad, you have always been on my top 10 list of things to thank God for.

Your parents have blessed me tremenously over the years with their undivided attention and love for me. They never treat me as their niece but more like their very own.

We strived better each day, look back in wonder and continue to be better parents as the days takes us.

No one is born a parent, perfect. But God teaches us each day how we should be, how we can be.

A day at a time..."

The little toddler is me..and the baby sleeping/lying down is my cousin John. I was a year older than him. We were staying in the same household with my late maternal grandparents. Thus we became inseparable play mates for years. Even after our parents moved out, I would stayed with him over the weekends and return home every Sunday.

I wrote this post is to reflect too..of how we always wonder how best we can live our lives better or how we can be a better sibling, or child to our parents or a better spouse to our spouses or a better parent to our children. But over the years, I learn to not to look back and expect myself to be better next year. But instead I look back and count my blessings.

Of all the days that God has blessed me, my family here and abroad. Of keeping them safe and healthy. Despite all the tribulations and trials in life we go through, God never fails to heal us, to wipe each tear from our eyes, to touch our hearts and renew it. He never fails to remind us, how precious we are in His eyes, more precious then the sparrows or the flowers that grew along the side crack of the winding road.

And how blessed our lives have became...one day at a time.

May you start the new year with more blessings.So much more that you seemed to take forever to count. In ways unknown and unseen and the great beyond.

Have a wonderful year ahead..!

God Bless you..each and everyone of you.!

Blue Christmas

2010-12-30T12:11:00.004+08:00

Blue Christmas sung by Bon Jovi. I particularly like this version than the solemn one that the late Jim Reeves used to sing

What did you do this Christmas eve 2010? I hope all of you have a wonderful Christmas with your family, your closest friends and your loved ones. My Christmas was spent like a yearly ritual of food and presents with my relatives. But it paused me to think about the first Christmas I had with Benny.

That was way back in 1986. I was then staying with my mom and the usuals was a home party with food cooked by several aunts and uncles and nieces or cousins. And the merry making of wine and drinks, desserts and cakes. Not forgetting, the presents under the tree.

But it was a quiet one for me. As Benny had to work on Christmas eve. Being in the retail line, he stayed till store closing and by the time they counted the money, close the shop and clean up a fair bit, he came to have Christmas with me...alone.

I remembered my uncle Wong asking me "Where is Benny? Isn't he coming?"

and I said with a bit of solemness in my voice

"He has to work. But he will come later..."

And Uncle Wong said "Then you better keep all the choice cuts of the Roast Beef, the juicy tender chunks of the Roast turkey for him. I think he would like that"

Uncle Wong is my mom's brother in law. And someone I adored and look up to for many years. I was his little flower girl when he walked down the aisle with my auntie some donkey years ago. For years, Uncle Wong doted on me and treated me like his very own. He saw me grew up, and I doted on his 3 children and treated them like my very own siblings. We were a very close knitted family of relatives.

And so it was...all my Christmas spent was spent with my extended families. For years, Benny was never around with me on Christmas Eve. In the recent years, as he rises through the ranks, he was able to go off from work and was able to spend Christmas Eve with the family.

But this year, he was tired and sick. So he stayed at home...and waited for me to return home with packed leftovers of the family feasting.

When we opened shop last year, I wanted our shop to close early on Christmas Eve. And without fail, we continue to do so this year. We had customers ringing us and showing displeasure over the phone and some even berated me for closing early.

On a happier note, this is what I did for Christmas with my family this year

American Carrot Cupcakes with Orange laced Cream Cheese Frosting
Black Pepper Chicken Pies

And had made extras to give to my neighbhours too...

Here's wishing you a Merry Happy and Joyous Christmas with EVERYONE at home and those aboard and A Very Blessed New Year too!

Simply LOVE

2010-12-19T10:31:00.002+08:00

"Try to Remember" Sung by The Brothers Four

After my pineapple tarts class yesterday at Robinsons, I woke up this morning..tired and completely drained. Then Benny told me he didn't have to work today. And ask what I would be cooking for lunch or dinner today. I told him I have to go to the shop to work. And I lamented how exhausted I was having to stand from noon to 8pm yesterday. Although the class starts from 2pm and ended at 6pm, I was there at 1pm to prep the place and had to clean up before I leave.

Seeing my tired and almost 'passion-drained' soul, he said this to me:

"I would take your place in the shop today. You stayed at home to rest. And let's go to the market to buy groceries to cook for lunch and dinner tonight"

So I got off to change and left the house without bringing my purse with me. In the car, he continue to say:

"Its been such a long time we go shopping together or even just to buy food together. "

and I said :

"Yes, we are so busy working. You are always rushing in and out for work. I was busy at the store, or teaching."

Then at the wet market, he survey the vegetable section, while I follow close behind. Like a little puppy, following her owner, I felt like that at that moment. Then as always, he would say "How about cooking this with that? I want to eat this and that." And for me, it was always "yes..whatever you like, dear. I'll cook, we eat"

Then he goes to pick and pay for the items..and gave me money to go to the hawker centre to buy breakfast. Then while I was waiting for the food and paying up, he would catch up with me there. And carry all my little bags of bee hoon or nasi lemak.

Then in our short car ride home, he would tell me how much he appreciated me for the little things I do for him, the sacrifices I had to make for him.

It was a simple gesture, just a 15 or 20 minutes ride to the market and a little shopping here and there. But in this short half an hour or so, he once again renewed this love we have for each other.

Remember what I wrote about our Wedding anniversary and about celebrating it? Well, this is what we do daily..so its like having our wedding anniversary every day, EVERY Moment, and Every BREATH we take together.

The simpliest thing here is the Simply Love and Devotion we have for each other...

So for lunch today, he says in a just.."just eat our breakfast meals from the coffee shop..save your energy for dinner. Go and rest..and I will go to the shop later.."

My love tank filled to the brim, my passion charged and my devotion for him, RENEWED.

Once in a blue moon

2010-11-30T13:46:00.010+08:00

I just love the Marcels and their Blue Moon song. Although it has nothing to do with my story today. All the wine songs are not very interesting.

My post today is about wine. Making it. And the story I was told about making it. All the myths, superstitions and what-noughts. Ever since I found out how to make it, I told myself that I must teach others about it and tell them all the grandmother tales about it are half the truth.

Making Rice wine at home is like going for an adventure trip. You have packed, and read all the notes, literature about the upcoming trip. Planned everything ahead of time. At the starting point, everything seems to be working along fine. Halfway through your journey, things just go wrong. You try to fix it in your best ability. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. At the end of this adventure, you tell yourself this:

"Yay! I made it! Sure, I have 101 problems and I need to figure it out. But hey! Its a pretty good for a first timer!"

This is how I see making wine is. As John Scully used to say "The Journey is the REWARD!".

It took me 10 kg of rice, and several months of trial and error, I finally found the answer to all my questions about wine making at home. Along the way, I met old wine masters (people who made wine as a business for sale or just for home consumption) and learn a thing or two about the perfect wine fermentation process.

Before my grandmother story starts, let me show you what I have achieve in my journey of wine making :

My most precious home made Chinese Yellow wine (Huang Jiu). It takes a year to reach this colour

Cherry wine : Made with Dark Sweet Cherries, pitted. This is just for fun. Took a fraction of the time to make.

2 Glasses of Chinese Wine : Yellow is Huang Jiu, Gold coloured wine is actually Dried Raisins Wine. You really need to have alot of patience to make dried friuits wine.

Black Glutinous Rice Wine..made with Black Glutinous Rice and Black Dates. Not for everyone/anyone. I made this for my friend, Miss Irene Yip of Chef Secrets Cooking Studio when she underwent a series of surgeries and was very weak and anemic. Very potent stuff and she drinks this as a health tonic.

My most prized home made wine (*by my mom, my dear sweet Mother in law, my aunts). Its used for cooking and can be drunk straight. Good home made Bai Mi Jiu is slightly cloudy and not really see through like water. Almost translucent.

Here's the basic recipe to make a bottle of good wine.

Bai Mi Jiu
Recipe by all the Wine Masters, perfected by Gina Choong
For the purpose of detailed documentation, you have to attend my wine making class to learn the full effects.

Yields 750ml wine
Ingredients
1kg white glutinous rice
1 pc of wine yeast
3 tbsp fine sugar

enough water to cook the rice in a rice cooker

Tools you will need:
2 large glass jar with a cover.(1 for wine fermentation, 1 for storing the rice wine residue)
2 clean glass bottles and 2 pcs of cork that can fit the bottles.
1 clean kitchen towel

Method:
1. Wash the rice under tap water. Make sure that there are no bugs, dirt in it.
2. Drain and cook it in a rice cooker, add water based on rice cooker measurements.
3. When its cooked, remove to air it. Make sure its completely COOLED.
4. Pound the wine yeast into powder and mix with the sugar.
5. Make sure the glass jar is cleaned and VERY DRY.
6. Mix the rice with the yeast/sugar mix, stuff into the jar and press it down.
7. The rice should only be 60 to 70% of the jar.
8. Cover with a kitchen towel cloth, then followed by the cover of the jar.
9. Leave it aside, untouched, undisturbed for 21 days.

Harvesting the wine
1. Scoop out the wine and leave it on a sieve which sits on top of a pot.
2. Leaving it alone to drain as much liquid it can. Pour the rice residue into another clean jar.
3. Repeat this process till all the wine are harvested.
4. Pour the wine into cleaned bottles fitted with a cork.
5. Leave it aside to settle and separated. This may take 2 to 5 days.
6. This is considered the FIRST yield and it looks cloudy and murky.
7. When it settles after a few days, this is what you will get..see pic below. The clear wine will float to the top of the bottle..the white residue will settle at the bottom of the bottle.
8. Slowly tip the bottle to pour out the clear wine and bottled it again. This is ready for cooking, or drinking.
9. The leftover residue can be poured back into the rice wine residue to continue with the fermentation.

What can you use to the Rice Wine Residue for?
The most common way is to use it for cooking.
Just 2 to 3 tbsps of this wine rice residue on top of Fresh prawns and off to the steamer for 5 mins. You get Wine Prawns.
Or marinate 3 tbsp with chicken and leave it overnight in the fridge, and fry it with ginger the next day. You get a good Wine Chicken with Ginger.

But my all time favourite way was to use it to make the traditional Huat Kueh
The recipe is long winded.

VERY IMPORTANT NOTES
1. Never put the jar next to the window where the sun shines into.
2. Never put the jar next to the stove..the heat from the stove will kill the fermentation
3. Never shake the jar too often.
4. During the crucial first 7 days, DO NOT open the jar even just to take a sniff at it. This will allow new air to enter the jar and slows down the fermentation process.

Why add sugar?
Sugar is used to help to kick start the wine fermentation. Its not to make it sweeter. If you know how to make wild yeast, sugar was use to mix with water, flour and left out to ferment. It turns sour and thus Wild yeast is 'born'.

Through my experiments at home, I found that without sugar, the wine still tastes the same. Only visual difference is the amount of yield per 1kg of rice. With Sugar, you get 750ml of wine. Without sugar, you get about 500ml +/-. The rice residue is more grainy without sugar, and more 'mashy soft' with sugar.

If you do this properly, by the 3rd day, you will see water emitting from the bottom of the jar. This is the early stages of wine fermentation. This is not really water.

Now the story behind the myths:

Myth no 1
You can only make wine at night.
The truth is…
Too much light will kill the wine yeast and prevent a proper fermentation. That is why winemaking should take place under low light – as in evening or at night.

Myth no 2
You have to do it alone. No one can help you.
The truth is…
In the old days when measurements were vague, wine-makers did not measure ingredients precisely, preferring to go by their instincts, according to quality of ingredients. As the saying goes: “Too many cooks spoil the broth”, and in this case, a single cook is better than two.

Myth no 3
You must be the only person to harvest the wine or it will go bad.
The truth is…
The person who started the wine is the best person to judge its fermentation progress. The wine jar can only be opened after the first seven days, when the wine will have matured. If the jar is opened up too often before that, fermentation may stop.

Myth no 4
You must hide the wine under the bed.
The truth is…
During fermentation, wine cannot be exposed to direct heat or sunlight. You can put the jar anywhere dark and cool, as long as it is not near direct sunlight or heat.

Myth no 5
You must be in a good mood when you are making wine.
The truth is…
This is more like truth than myth. If you are in a bad mood, you may hurry through the process or forget a crucial step. Wine making takes time and attention. And, the best ingredients in any recipe are always the love and passion the cook puts in!

Tears in Heaven

2010-11-26T17:52:00.002+08:00

I am not a big fan of Eric Clapton(song writer and artiste). But a friend once told me he written and sang this song "Tears in Heaven" after he lost his son.

So it seems that this song was often sung or dedicated to folks who lost their little ones. I think its really a very sad song if you put it in that perspective. That is this part in my life as a mother I never talked about... loosing a baby. I never have had lost a baby or child...but I lost 2 in the making.

The first came and was brief, sudden. I was in my early 2nd month of marriage. Still in my so called honeymoon stage. I missed a period and didn't thought of it. Then I told my mom about it, she said better go and check. And I found I was pregnant. I didn't know whether I was happy or sad or excited. I wanted a baby..I think Benny would love to have one too. But we just got married. It would be ideal if we had time to enjoy each other before the little one comes.

But it was the will of God. Or so we thought. I was getting excited and was pleasantly surprised. Benny and I took time to think and plan what and how we should re-decorate our home. We were staying with my mom soon after my marriage. Our HDB Flat is not ready(still in building stage).

Then I started spotting..soon pain came and before I knew it, I lost my first baby. Just like that. All in 3 and half weeks of knowing I was pregnant. I was devastated. I remembered fondly that my late father in law was very forgiving. He said he ask "Pu Zai" (Buddha) to bless me and I will be pregnant again soon. Although I was a Christian, I knew that he meant well and prayed in his own way for my recovery. My mother in law took care of me..cooking tonic soups she said would help me to strengthen my womb for a new baby.

My dad told me otherwise :

"Ting, God gives us the BEST of everything. Loosing a baby its not the end of the world. In fact, its the beginning of learning to lean on God for everything. A child lost this way means its never meant to be. Take heart and know that He only gives the best to us."

Then life goes on after that..and true enough almost a year later, when my body and womb has recovered, I was pregnant again. But Natasha as a baby in me also gave me much medical problems. I was bleeding throughout my pregnancy from conception till I was in my 28 weeks. When the bleeding stops, the gynae found too much blood clot in the birth canal and planned that I was to have a C-section.

I was anemic to make matters worse. And had fainting spells all the time. Once into my 20th week, I fainted in town after walking down the steps fro a bus and a passerby rang an ambulance and send me to the hospital. I never got to say "Thank you" to whoever that send me to the hospital.

Natasha was also born prematured..a month shy of being a New Year baby..she was born on 14 December 1990. But she was perfect in every way. Despite of all the medical problems I had to face. She was a splitting image of her dad. My in-laws adored her. And showered her with kisses and hugs. She was my late father-in-law's favourite grand child.

Years later...I wanted to have a 2nd child so that Natasha won't be alone when we are back with God. I was pregnant sometime when Natasha was about 3 years old. This time, we had plans made and then it happened again. Again, I was planning for the baby to come. I had bought all the new baby stuff and bed. Then I lost the baby again..thru a miscarriage. This time, it tore me up really really deep and bad. I found out that my baby was a boy. Which Benny and I had planned to name him "Jonathan" which has a meaning of "Gift of God". I could feel him inside me. Then I bleed like I did with Natasha too. And I thought, that's normal.

But Jonathan was never meant to be. This time, maybe because I wanted a baby so much. My tears were not comforted. I remembered crying alone and I didn't want Benny to see me in tears. I was working in Jardine Fleming back then. Su, my boss was the only person who comforted me. So she send me off to Malaysia, and to Indonesia to work. So that I could forget.

Then I threw away everything I bought for my baby Jonathan. I gave away his baby clothes. I sold the baby cot. I gave away my maternity clothes to the poor. I don't want to see the things I have prepared for him. Natasha was too young back then to understand.

Then a year later..when the dust has settled. My tears have been wiped...I found out I was pregnant again. This time, I told myself not to get too worked up again. Until the baby is born and I am carrying him or her in my arms, its here to stay. Till then, we just wait and see.

2 months into the pregnancy, I started to experience problems. The gynae suggested a fluid test as I was nearing 35 years old. Which I did. And they found out she's a girl and may be a sick baby with multiple deformities.

I remembered the people around me...crying for me silently and praying for me. I remembered Auntie Katherine and my late uncle Daniel Chen(both from USA)..they prayed for her and for me.

Benny and I cried for her. We told God that we do not want to bring her into the world to suffer if she has all these deformities. We ask God to take her away like He did with Jonathan and my first one. But God didn't. In fact, the specialist doctor told us that the fluid test is not a 100% proof that the baby is deform. After all, one is taking fluid in the womb that had the baby's dead skin cells being tested. Its just to know what to expect and how to react.

My dad said "If God gives you a baby and He doesn't take it away, then the baby is meant to be yours forever! Learn to lean on Him and pray for deliverance"

And so we did...for 5 months till her birth, we prayed..together with Brother Kim San from our church. Brother Kim San lead a group of Christian brothers and sisters and prayed every Thursday for her. They ask for God's healing and strength.. For months, no one knew what to expect and along the way, many grew weary. Brother Kim San stood on his ground and lead the group to pray with faith put on God.

My little girl was born prematured..at 30 weeks. The moment she drew breath, the doctors wheeled her into the incubator. They drew blood from her tiny body to check if she had blood disorder and X ray her to see if she had any deformities inside her. After going thru a battery of tests, scans and X Rays, they found her PERFECT in every way.

When I was awoke from the c-section, Benny and I returned Melody Lim to God...and Thank God for giving her to us to care for and to love. That every breath she takes, is a gift from Him. And every word she speaks, she would speak of His Glory to us all.

Now moving forward.... my Little Melody is 12 years old. Just finished her PSLE and came out tops! Her sister, Natasha is in her first year in University.

When I looked back in time..I knew of the many tears I have shed in silence for Jonathan. I dont' talk about him to anyone. Because it still hurts. So I can understand any woman out there who tells me that they still grieve over their lost baby. If Jonathan is alive, he would be 14 years old now. But I know deep in me..he is in Heaven. Waiting for me and Benny.

Till that day comes, my tears for him will still run..silently, in moments here and there.

To all who frequents my blog and read it with comfort or in sadness...do know that God oversees us in everything we do. He will give you a child of your own some day..some time. Just learn to lean on Him.

Be Blessed...AMEN!

Swinging on a Star

2010-11-14T08:31:00.003+08:00

Song sung by actor Doris Day..A song I loved as a teenager when I use to be in the school choir. Our choir teacher use to teach us to sing this song. I don't like Birthday songs..so I decided to use this for my birthday post.

I literally swinging on a star now..coz my king at home is happy with the Birthday noodles I made for him on his birthday, that's yesterday. I couldn't post yesterday because I had to go to Robinsons at Centrepoint. To assist Chef Halimah in her first class there.

Benny ask for Tonpo Ruo(Stewed Pork Belly) for lunch this weekend. And I thought it was such a good way to use that for his birthday noodles. Litrally breaking way from tradition for a while.

Here's my recipe for this..very elaborate and long winded. But the time is not wasted when someone you are trying to cook this for, appreciates it.

Tea Smoked Tonpo Ruo with noodles
Recipe by Gina Choong

Ingredients
1kg pork belly
5 pcs Slab brown sugar
30ml Dark soya sauce
100ml Light soya sauce
2 tsp Szechuan peppercorns
1 tbsp Tie Guan Yin(Chinese Tea leaves)
800ml water
200g spring onions

Ingredients for Smoking
1 cup rice(uncooked, raw)
2 tbsp Tie Guan Yin(chinese tea leaves)

Method to cook the pork
1. Heat up a pot of water to briefly cook the pork for 5 minutes. Discard the water, wash the semi cook pork in tap water.
2. Using a large claypot or big casserole, lined the bottom with spring onions.
3. Put the pork belly(side side down) on top of the spring onions.
4. Stuff tea leaves in a tea bag and also the pepper corns in another tea bag.
5. put in on top the pork.
6. Pour in all the liquid ingredients and making sure the liquid covers the pork.
7. Turn on the fire and leave it to boil, then lower the heat, cover the pot to simmer for 2 hours.
8. Check on the liquid, add hot water occasionally if the level drops below the meat.
9. Test for tenderness of the meat to make sure its cooked through.
10. Turn off fire, remove the pork from the sauce and leave it on a plate.

Method to smoke:
1. Line an old wok with aluminium foil.
2. mix rice and tea leaves together and toss it all over the foil.
3. Put a wire rack/steamer rack on top.
4. Cover the wok and turn on the fire at high heat. Wait till you see some smoke emitting from the sides of the wok, then turn off the fire.
5. Place the plate of pork on the rack, cover the wok again.
6. Leave it to stand(without turning on the fire) for about 1 hour. This allows the meat to absorb/fused with the tea smoke.

Method to serve :
1. Cook noodles over hot water, drain in cold water.Toss it with sesame oil.
2. Add it into a bowl. Place sliced Tonpo Ruo on top of the noodles.
3. Pour hot stewed sauce on top of the noodles.
4. Serve immediately.

Notes:
I use Tie Guan Yin tea because its 'greener' despite being dried. And it emits a nice robust tea flavour in cooking and smoking.

If you have the patience for smoking, go ahead and try it. Use it to smoke any kind of meats(only after its cooked).
If not, just omit the smoking part.

I mentioned old wok because I have a wok that is heavily scratched/spoiled by the domestic helpers I have in the past. I never throw it out. But use it for such purposes.

Love Is.. An Anniversary

2010-11-12T09:36:00.004+08:00

Today is our 22nd year of wedded bliss..yes, Benny and I were married on this day, 22 years ago, in 1988. The day after, we flew to LA, USA to have our honeymoon. It was also his birthday.

I remembered our first anniversary, spent in our first home. We were broke after spending all our savings on the wedding, the holidays and doing up our first house. Back then, I couldn't cook a decent meal. I was literally an amateur in every aspect as a home maker. Being old fashioned and old school, Benny wanted no cakes just a bowl of noodles soup with an egg and maybe a chicken thigh on the side. And that was what we had.

To make it look romantic, I tried to put up 2 candles, and I bought sparkling juice to make up as champagne like the kind we see in fancy Hollywood romantic movies.

It was the most memorable day for me that day, 21 years ago. Why? Because I can't cook, I think I was a lousy wife. And I cook that noodles straight out of a pack of Instant noodles with the soup base pack. The chicken wasn't even there. Just a soft boiled egg swimming inside the soup.

When he came home from work, he knew I was up to something. After all, its our first anniversary. He sat down to have noodles with me and drunk up all the juice. He was smiling at me. But I couldn't bring myself to smile. I was really miserable. And then he said to me :

"Love, why so glum? I want to remember us in all the years to come that you are my wife, the one I married because she loves me and cares for me. Never mind if she can't cook very well. But she meant well, and tried her best."

by then, I was almost driven to tears. . And then I said to him:

"Ben, I am such a failure. I promised to cook something you like to eat. But all I could do was instant noodles and an egg. I couldn't figure out how to cook the chicken till its tender like those Hainanese chicken style. I am sorry if this meal was not what you expected"

And then he said:

"Its you I need by my side, all the days of my life. And all the things you can think of and plan for me. Even though you couldn't do it properly. From this day forth, let us not celebrate our anniversary. But showed each other our love, attention and care every moment of our lives together. Its better that way than to wait for that one day to celebrate. Because we do not know what the future holds for us. We should love and care for each other every moment."

So here it is..we kept true to that promise. We are not celebrating in any way our Anniversary. Because we have been celebrating it every day, every moment, every minute of our lives together. In everything we do. In every breath we take. We tell each other of happy things and sad things and angry things we do everyday, the people we meet..the places we been in our day past.

This song "I Can't Smile Without You" By Barry Manilow was a song Benny use to sing to tease me, whenever I was trying to do something that was beyond me..mainly it was to cook something for him and I can't do it well.

May you have a Blessed life and wedded bliss with your better half..!

Sing a Song of Six Pence

2010-10-30T18:19:00.004+08:00

That old nursery rhyme :

Sing a song of sixpence a pocket full of rye,
Four and twenty blackbirds baked in a pie.
When the pie was opened the birds began to sing,
Oh wasn't that a dainty dish to set before the king?

In this case, my king at home wants an unusual dish for dinner this week. I was watching House on Channel 5 2 nights ago and suddenly he came and say this to me :

"Shall we have CCF with Curry Chicken?" (CCF stands for Chee Cheong Fun, a kind of flat noodles rolled up like a swiss roll. Its made of rice flour, water and salt..delicate to make but very delicious to eat..!)

I said :

"I am trying to watch House..what kind of weird dish is that?"

and then he said :

"Well, something different for a change. I am sick of eating the same old dish every week. I want some variety. I just thought of this. Its just cut up the CCF and pour the piping hot curry chicken over it. Like that!"

To him, everything I cook its simple enough or "like that!".

So yesterday, he shop for all the ingredients needed for his unusual dish. Here's my simple and anyhow do dish. Hope you like it too..

note : There are only 5 persons at home. I always have to assume my King is x2.

Curry Chicken with Chee Cheong Fun
Serves 6 persons

Ingredients
1 whole chicken, about 1.8 kg
1 can of Evaporated milk(I use Carnation's Full Cream)
500ml water
500ml Coconut cream
4 medium red onions
6 local ripe red tomatoes
8 local potatoes, skinned, cut into quarters.
1 tbsp salt

Curry Paste ingredients
10 pcs dried chilli(soften in water)
5 pcs chilli padi
3 small red onions
1 clove garlic
50g dried shrimps
1 pc Lemon grass
1 tsp belachan(previously roasted, pounded into powder)
2 tbsp Curry powder

100ml corn oil

Method:
1. Wash and cut up chicken into smaller pieces.
2. Heat up wok with 50ml corn oil , add onions to saute till soft
3. Add cooked paste to fry for a while.
4. Add chicken parts to fry over high heat for 5 mins.
5. Lower heat to simmer for 5 mins.

6. In the meantime, heat up a large casserole or pot with water. Once it starts boiling, add potatoes, tomatoes.
7. Turn off wok heat, pour contents into soup pot.
8. When it starts boiling again, add milk and coconut milk, lower heat to simmer till potatoes are cooked. About 15 mins over low heat. Add salt to taste.
9. Turn off heat, serve over steamed CCF or rice or roti prata.

Method to Cook the paste:
1. Blend paste ingredients except oil in a blender till smooth.
2. Heat up oil in wok and add paste to fry till fragrant and it should turn slightly darker orangey red.
3. Set aside for later use.

Notes about CCF
The King bought it from a market somehow..have no idea. Costs S$2 for pack of 10 strips..enough for 2 persons. So he bought 2 packets.

To serve, just steamed the CCF over rapid water for 10 mins or until soft.

A Summer Place

2010-10-21T09:10:00.008+08:00

Sung by Cliff Richard..also the theme song for a hollywood movie under the same title. : A Summer Place.

When I was a teen, I was always wanting to know about true love and wanted to see if such romances really do exists. I remember asking my dad about it. And because he spoke English, he would tell me in a mix of English and Hokkien about his one true love and how he won her heart.

My dad said my mom was his first true love. He met her when he was working as a relief teacher at the Yock Eng High School(Chinese school at Tanjong Katong Road). The form teacher was away and the school was looking for a relief teacher to teach for a period of time. My dad said he was teaching English back then in her class.

After a few lessons, he had started to notice her. Then she stopped coming for classes. He ask the other students about her and they told him that she has dropped out of school permanently. Due to poor family backgrounds.

My dad said he found out where she stayed and visited her in her kampong..some where near Kim Chuan Road/Tai Seng Road area. And would ask her to return to school to continue her education. My mom quit school when she was in Secondary 3 so that her younger siblings had a chance for school and education which promised them a better life and future.

My mom has always been an inspiration to me and to all her siblings(my uncles, aunties). My dad thought that it was such a noble act to give up education for her siblings. He said he would visit her and gave her tuition if she wanted to learn but couldn't afford it.

Of course on the pretext of learning...but my dad used this 'excuse' to get to know her better.

The rest of the story..well, my dad never did tell me how he woo her..but one thing is for sure, its being PERSISTENT and stick to it.

Here's a picture of them together ... in the old days of Black n White.

And when they marry..

and then there were Three..my sister Winnie was born. The old usual way was a family portrait..

A few more years down the road, I was born. But because I was a sickly baby, my mom wanted to wait till I was rosy-cheeked and healthy enough for a family portrait..so here it is..

The threads of time passes by... I was 12 years old, my sister was 18 going on 19 years...

And then that Summer Place repeats for me and my sister...now with our families together celebrating my dad's 70th birthday some 8 years ago...

My parents are in their autumn years..my dad's already 78 years old and my mom is 74 years old. In the recent years, my mom's health deteriorated so my dad quit his full time job as a English/Chinese translator with the Church of Singapore to spend all his time with her and take care of her. He wanted to learn to cook recently...because my mom is a perfectionist when it comes to food for the family. So that he could whip up a meal for her.

My dad is a quiet man. He hardly spoke unless he was spoken to. If he had to teach, then he would speak. Most of the times, he won't hear him say much. He is a wonderful father to us and a loving grand dad to our girls and to my niece. He would tell them stories..the same ones he would told me when I was a kid.

He would watch Bugs Bunny or Yosemite Sam or the occasional Tom and Jerry or Road Runner with them. When we went to Disneyland USA in 1996, my parents went with us. My dad joined in all the rides and was a part of every fun ride we took.

When I met Benny, I told him that my ideal man is someone like my dad. Someone who loved his wife, his kids and the family. Someone who grew up with his children and be a part of their lives. And God answered my prayer..Benny was someone like dad. Benny wished I was like my mom because she could tend to the family needs very well. I don't think I could measure up to my mom..but my aunts told me in some ways, I am doing the things my mom use to do when she was abled and healthier.

My parents now lived with my sister and my brother in law and my niece too. They sold their HDB apartments some 24 years ago and bought a house with shared income. Over the years my sister bought their share and gave them money to keep. All these years, my sister and my brother in law took it in them to care and provide for them.

Benny and I shared in their provision with my sister and my brother in law. In everything we do, we do it for them : our parents.
Our family are very close and knitted tightly like a woven cloth. And the same values are taught through our kids and we can only hope they continue to be like this for a long time to come.

Yesterday I spent a day with my girls..downtown Singapore shopping, eating and just walking around. But I stood from afar, observing my girls..and I saw a reflection of me and my sister when we are their age..sharing and caring and loving each other.

It left me deeply satisfied and encouraged as my girls tell me in time to come when I am as old as Po-Po(their granny, my mom), they would spend all their days taking care of me.

Dear God, thank you..! For every little thing you have done for me. And many more in the future that I cannot know or see. But I know in my heart, You have already provided them for me.

AMEN!

Chilli in my Rojak Part 8

2010-10-18T10:17:00.009+08:00

We Are Family (song) sung by Sisters Sledge

Recently my cousin Connie sms me asking if I could bake the Rose Petals Chiffon Cake for her tea party at home. Of course, I say "YES!". And I told Benny about it. And he said :

"Serve friends with cake? why no food? Does she need anything? Maybe cook some food for her to serve her friends too."

I replied:

"Mei Mei knows me too well, she wouldn't want to work me too hard. She just ask for a cake. "

I call Connie as Mei Mei or younger sister. I have been calling her Mei Mei since her birth. We grew up together. I spent all my school holidays with her and her brother, Mun Pun.

And since we are having Hainanese Chicken soup and all the side dishes, Benny decided to get 2 very plump chickens to make sure we have enough for Mei Mei too.

But I did a little more for her. I baked 3 cakes for her little tea party. And served her 2 portions of Chicken rice, soup, nonya Achar, chilli sauce. Why 2 portions of rice? Well, I wanted to settle her with lunch and dinner so she doesn't need to go out after serving her friends and cleaning up her place.

She came at 11:30am to pick up 1 cake but went home with these...

I baked a Blueberry Yogurt Creme Cake, no pictures, too rush to take one.

This was for her tea party last Saturday, 16 October 2010.
Earl Grey Tea Chiffon Cake.

Rose Petals Chiffon Cake. The burnt spots on top was actually the rose petals..

Chicken Rice Set with Achar(home made)

I posted these on Facebook and she replied to me via FB. She said

"tk U GIna for the packed lunch & dinner, they really warmed my stomach & my soul ;>"

I remembered when she was looking for an apartment, she was looking around Hougang zone. Her mom, my aunt rang me to ask me for advice about the neigbhouring blocks near my place. In the midst of chatting, my aunt ask me for a favour.

"Ting, help me to watch over Mei Mei. She will be moving out to live on her own now. Uncle and I will moved in to stay with Mun Pun. "

I told Auntie

"Aunty, yes of course I will.You forgotten that you have ask me to watch over her for you since she was born some 30 odd years ago. When she was very young, I use to baby sit her and play with her. I read her stories and watch cartoons on TV with her. I help to wash her hands before meal time and put her to bed for afternoon naps. All these years, I have grown but I have never stopped loving her and caring for her. "

When Mei Mei said those words on FB..it also warmed my heart and my soul. Knowing that despite being a generation gap away, we are still very much like a big family..still caring for one another.

So let's sing the happy song by Sisters Sledge...

We are family, I got all my sisters n me..and also all your brothers, cousins, uncles, aunties and their extended family.

A Recipe for Love

2010-10-14T11:22:00.008+08:00

Is there ever such a thing for a recipe for love? I once saw this poem written and printed on cards, some were made into a wooden plaque and others framed in a nice picture frame. A gift for newly wedded couples or someone you know who is celebrating their wedding anniversary.

Here's the poem:

Recipe for Love
Author, unknown.

Ingredients

2 Hearts Full of Love
2 Heaping Cups of Kindness
2 Armfuls of Gentleness
2 Cups of Friendship
2 Cups of Joy
2 Big Hearts Full of Forgiveness
1 Lifetime of Togetherness
2 Minds Full of Tenderness

Method

Stir daily with Happiness, Humor and Patience.
Serve with Warmth and Compassion, Respect and Loyalty.

********************************************************

Well, my recipe of Love is somewhat similar. Only that it is also edible. I go to great lengths to make Benny happy. Happy to know that he is home, happy that he knew his tummy will be filled with the comfort food he loves to eat and happy to know that all he needs is just to tell me what he wants.

Last week, he wanted the buns I taught my friend Janice Yu when she came from the Philippines. He wanted a more spicy version. It was a Susie Bun with char siew pork recipe. I use the basic Susie bun recipe but tweak it and added curry powder in it. For the fillings I didn't have pork meat so I use canned luncheon meat..mashed it and fried it with onions, peas and curry spice.

This is My Recipe for Love..for him. Sharing with all, my so-called secret recipe.

Curry Spiced Buns
Recipe by Gina Choong

Ingredients :
500 g plain flour
270 ml water
1.5 tsp instant yeast
1 tsp salt
100 g castor sugar
3 tbsp butter
1 tsp curry powder(I use Baba's brand for Meat Curry)

30g melted butter(salted), for brushing /glazing

Method :
1. Mix sifted curry powder, flour, yeast, salt, castor sugar into the Mixer bowl(kitchenAid)
2. Turn the dial to no. 1 and slowly pour in the water.
3. Let the mixer knead the dough for 30 mins.
4. Add melted butter and knead for another 5 mins till evenly mixed.
5. Stop the mixer. Remove the dough and place in a greased bowl.
6. Cover with a wet cloth and place in a warm place to let it double in size.(about 60 mins or 1 hour).
7. Shape dough into 50 g balls. Flatten each dough ball and add 1 tbsp of curry meat.
8. Cover and seal the dough. Place on a grease loaf pan.
9. Brush with melted butter. Let it proof again for another 10 mins.
10. Bake in preheated oven 180C for 20 mins.
11. Remove and cool completely on a wire rack.

Curry Luncheon meat
Recipe By Gina Choong

Ingredients
1 can Pork Luncheon meat(removed from the can), mashed it with a fork
2 medium red onions, peel and chopped
1 tbsp cooking oil
1.5 tbsp curry powder
100g frozen mixed veggie
1 tsp sugar

Method
1. Heat up the wok with oil and add onions to fry till soft.
2. Add mixed veggie, curry powder and fry over high heat.
3. Add mashed meat, sugar and stir fry quickly to mix evenly.
4. Remove to cool completely.

I made extras like 25 buns. My students who came for the Chiffon cake I had last week had a sampling of the buns. And I gave them one each to bring home to share with their loved ones.

Enjoy..!

Waiting 'round the bend

2010-10-13T11:51:00.003+08:00

I use to write often as a child. Short stories here and there. Then as I grew older, I didn't have time to write so I drew on paper with a 2B pencil. Scribbles, doodles all the time. I never kept them. Now I have to re-write them again. Hopefully, in my blog, it stays archived too. So I won't lose it again.

Many who read my blog commented that I wrote very well. That credits my dad. Who was a great influence to me when it comes to reading books, both fiction and non-fiction. He also decides what I should watch. As a child, my dad use to love to go the cinemas to catch a movie during the school holidays. Since he was also an English teacher in a school in Singapore, school holidays meant he didn't have to go to work.

When I was in Primary school, all my peers read Enid Blyton's fairy tales or the Children's classic stories like Goldilocks or Cinderalla. I didn't. My dad decided what I should read and check on me to make sure I read them. He would test me with questions about the characters in the story and see if I knew or just pretended to read the book.

My dad listens to the radio but only tune in to BBC or British Broadcasting Channel. For years, in his car as he drove...we only get to hear BBC and that British accent. My dad thinks its the best English with all the right pronounication. He was quick to correct me all the time when I spoke and pronounced words wrongly.

I remembered when I was in P6(12 years old), my dad bought a condensed version of Ernest Hemingway's "The Old Man and the sea". A child's version for me to read. And he said :

"Ting, read this book. No skipping between the lines and tell me what you think of the Old Man. I also need you to tell me why this story is unique as compared to all the others you have read"

Good grief! I can't read a book like most kids can. My dad never allows me to read a book with a lollipop stuck between my gums. Or popping in biscuits. He said when your mind is pre-occupied with munching, chewing something, you will be distracted and cannot fully comprehend the story.

If you have read this book, you will know what I mean here:

Its the worst book I have ever read in my life. Its the most BORING book I have come across. As a child of 12 years of age, I have no idea why my dad would want me to read such a boring book. I can't think of anything to tell my dad about the book or the characters in the story.

But there were lessons to be learn..from this old Boring Classic. Something that most people won't think of. My dad said :

"Yes, its boring. Its boring because there seems to be no plot or hero to be mentioned or talked about. The story is about an old man who went fishing in the big wide ocean. He managed to catch a very big fish...a Marlin(a fish with long sword like horn on the tip of its nose) in his little row-boat. And the story is just about him, and the sea and the fish and the after math when he rowed back to shore.."

And he continued to say :

"Why is it important to read this book? What is so great about it? Its the background of the story..look at it this way, there is no big plot, there is actually no big story or excitement at the end of it. What I wanted you to read was the way it was written. About the way he describe his journey, his 'adventure' on sea, how he explain the loniliness, the sea, the weather, and later the excitement when he caught the fish.

This book is all about illustrations..in the literal form. The next thing to do now is to watch the movie. Do you know that it is often difficult to act out an emotion written ?"

It was through this simple boring book that sparks off my ever lasting journey of what I often call as "Reading a Movie". Means you read the book, then watch the movie. If you manage to watch the movie before you read the book, you will not appreciate the book and the way the author is trying so hard to write his/her thoughts.

I chose Moon River as my song for this post because its one of the movies I use to watch with my dad. Brings back many many wonderful memories of my childhood days. "Moon River" is a song composed by Johnny Mercer (lyrics) and Henry Mancini (music). And was use in the movie which I think everyone knew "Breakfast at Tiffany's" . The title of my post is one of the lyrics(lines) in the Moon River song..

You know..if you have been following my stories here at my blog, you would have read about my ex boss, Ms Su-Chzeng. When she interviewed me for the job, one of the things she ask me was "what kind of books I read when I was a kid". This was my list to her:

The Old Man and the Sea
The Time Machine
The Pearl
Black Beauty
Frankenstein's Monster

And I also told her my dad use to make me read poetry by William Woodworth. Su Chzeng used to think that no kid would read the above books..and if she ever found someone who reads that, that person must be one to work with her. Because Su Chzeng use to teach English Literature at Oxford University in London before she quit and worked as Editor for literacy works and book publishers.

Now that PSLE exams are over, Melody tells me her grandfather, (my dad) is bringing her out on a shopping spree...to buy story books to read.

That's my dad..and that is one of the many reasons why I loved him and respected him. He teaches us and brings out the best in us.

I Feel Pretty

2010-10-12T10:00:00.003+08:00

Recently I became extremely upset with someone. Which I will not relate in public like in a blog. When we were kids in school, we were taught to sing this happy song : "When you're happy and you know it, clap your hands!"

So when you are unhappy, what song do you sing? And what song makes you feel happy. I find the only song that makes me happy is this one from the movie "Anger Management" where Jack Nicholson and Adam Sandler sang "I Feel Pretty". Its funny to watch as the two men acted out the scenes and makes a lighter tone to the hilarious movie.

Here's the real song version by the late Natalie Wood in the original movie "The West Side Story"

So when I am really really upset or angry with someone or something, I would play this song by Adam Sandler...

Enjoy..!

Endless Love

2010-10-08T01:51:00.003+08:00

(Note: The movie wasn't censored. Some nude scenes..!)

Endless Love was a love story movie made in the year 1981. I was still in Pre U back then. I remembered watching it at the cinema with a few friends. It made me cry at the movies. Because of the ending. I use to be so crazy about the theme song, also called Endless Love sung by Lionel Richie and Diana Ross. I would listen to it all the time. Before iPod or iPhones became popular, there was the Sony Walkman (cassette in a mini player). That costs me a good S$50.00. Back then $50 was like now $100 or more..

2 years later, in 1983, I met Sidney. I used to think he was my 'Endless Love'. But he was never meant to be. It was Benny that became my Endless Love. Next month, Benny and I will celebrate our 22 years of marriage and 24 years of knowing each other. Its been a tremendous journey. Natasha is in her first year in University and she's studying psychology. Melody is in Primary 6 this year. While many says we are enjoying the fruits of our labour, our kids have grown, I still think we need to struggle another decade more to see through Melody finishing school once and for all.

Each day as he drives me home from work, we talked fondly of our many yesterdays, of wonderful memories of being in love and watching our girls come into our lives. And watching them grow and being who they are now.

Sometimes our conversations turn a bit teary eyed as we talk about our friends or the people we met along the way. The ones who have loved and lost. The poor and the forsaken. And how much we can do for them if we had tried.

Though we never spoke of one subject again, we are often reminded of it. That one subject or topic was "Till Death Do Us Part". He will talk about anything under the sun but never about either one of us being left behind should one leaves this world sooner. He used to tell me, when that day comes, we will see what happens. And every year, while we spent all our time making sure the family is fed, kids go to school, we find time..whatever time we have to show each other how much we loved each other. In things we do for each other..

Tomorrow, Willie will take half a day off so he could work full day this Sunday. It was intended that I was to work with Natasha at the shop tomorrow. But Benny says to me yesterday, while on the road, driving home:

"Have Natasha stayed at the shop. I will go there at 7pm to close the shop. You stayed home and rest. You have not been resting for over 3 weeks now. And you can do your own things and not have anyone bother you "

"My own Thing" to him means to have time for myself..its me-time. To go for a haircut or to go shopping for a pair of new shoes or some clothes perhaps.

This is why Benny is my Endless Love. If I stopped loving him, the whole universe will disappear and the stars will stop burning. And with each day, I find no excuses not to love someone who cares for me in more ways than I can ever need.

May you find your one true "Endless Love"

God Bless you...

Take my hand...

2010-10-03T10:22:00.004+08:00

Yesterday Singapore mourns the passing of a leader's better half, his left and right person, his confidante, his beloved. Our Minister Mentor Mr Lee Kuan Yew's wife, Madam Kwa Geok Choo. Although I never knew her in person, or saw her in public. But I knew her through the media and the way Mr Lee fondly talks about her.

As I watched the News on TV Channel 5, I cried when the news reporter talked about her life with MM Lee Kuan Yew. Her passing meant MM Lee a great loss for it seems like their union was made in Heaven and his life and the way he shaped our country was all with a woman who stood by him through thick and thin. She was there for him in the early days in his political status in Singapore and was there for him when their children came into their lives. She was there with him in all his public appearences, in every way, she tried to mingle with his 'social' crowd.

She is a mentor to many of us : Women who are married to our better halves who lead a hectic work schedules and have to cope with home and family and tend the fort. My mom cried when she heard her passing yesterday. She said she kept watchful eyes and ears to read and hear about her overall health over the years. And was saddened to know she has passed on. We all wished that she left without physical pain and wished MM Lee Kuan Yew and PM Lee Hsien Loong and their extended family our deepest condolences and may God bless them as they lay the late Madam Kwa Geok Choo to rest.

This hymn sang by Jim Nabors is appropriate for this post.
Words & music by Thomas A. Dorsey

Precious Lord, take my hand
Lead me on, let me stand
I'm tired, I’m weak, I’m lone
Through the storm, through the night
Lead me on to the light
Take my hand precious Lord, lead me home

When my way grows drear precious Lord linger near
When my life is almost gone
Hear my cry, hear my call
Hold my hand lest I fall
Take my hand precious Lord, lead me home

When the darkness appears and the night draws near
And the day is past and gone
At the river I stand
Guide my feet, hold my hand
Take my hand precious Lord, lead me home

May God bless you and keep you..Madam Kwa, until we meet again on the peaceful shores.

A New Chapter

2010-09-30T12:51:00.005+08:00

After months of to and fro, up and down, left and right with the trainers,Robinson and Wiltshire...finally, the birth of a new chapter awaits..

Alongside with us, my good friend Miss Violet Khoo, owner of Genius R Us will also be hosting her classes there. She runs kids baking classes and will run a series at Robinson too. I met Violet some 2 years ago when she and her hubby came to attend a private session with me on how to mould fondant figurines. After some practice, she decided to incorporate fondant modelling in her classes with kids.

And when I open Kitchen Capers retail store, Violet was most supportive and I shared many tips about how best to run her classes for little ones.

By February next year, we will be having a new Chef trainer to join our team. She is Miss Shinni Tock from Baking Cow. Shinni will be running her popular Macaroons baking classes with us. Over time, she will introduce more baking classes at Robinson too.

Till end of October 2010, my classes are still held at home as the studio in town is still under Lynette's charge. However, you can view all the courses available from our KC website and be able to register even now. Payment is done online, via Paypal.

Goody bag will be given out to all our students. I will not tell you what the contents are..its a surprise sponsored by Wiltshire and also by KC aka yours truly. Just a hint : by KC its often ingredients, by Wiltshire its often something bake-ware related.

With each class, we may get different sponsors and we may hand out more freebies. And I will make it a point that freebies are things we can use in our home kitchen. No tissue papers or book marks or ball point pens.

These are our gesture of thanks for the support you have given to me all these years, to attend my classes and also to have faith in me for this.

God Bless you..

Miracles are made for...

2010-09-20T08:30:00.006+08:00

The above song is sung by Mariah Carey and Whitney Houston for the animated movie "The Prince of Eqgyt". The song is called "When You Believe"

This is the Animated version of the Song..

I use to think that miracles are like a fantasy of dreams that goes unfulfilled. I was born with many medical problems. My parents sheltered me for a lot of things, harsh and otherwise. At the age of 6 months old(a baby), I had my first surgery on my chest. The doctors removed a diseased rib from my rib cage. My dad told me I stayed in the hospital for long periods. My mom would visit the hospital every day to nurse me. She feared hospitals, the smells and she often had to walk past the mortuary and she fear the unknown. But she braved it all for me.

My dad wasn't a Christian back then. Only my mom was a Christian. My dad told me later, it was his 2 sister in laws who prayed with him and brought him to Christ. They are my aunts. Auntie Katherine who now lives in USA and Auntie Toa Payoh(as we affectionately labelled her because she lives in Toa Payoh).

My dad gave me back to God..and he said :

"I return Ting Ting back to You. If it is in your divine plans that she lives, then let her be a testimony to You and all the mighty works You do. But if she is not, then take her home with You and let her suffer no more"

This is ME! before the surgery.

A prayer which most parents won't dare to say or commit to God. And especially to a God they don't believe or have faith in as yet.

But my dad was different. He believed. And it is thru this little mustard seed of faith he had in God that I was healed. Years later, when I was older, my dad told me all this. And said that I have small little big shoes to fill. To be a testimony for God. That Miracles do happen, only when you believe.

When I was a child going to school, I didn't do PE(Physical Education) or be involved in any sport events. I was exempted with a Medical certificate from the family Doctor, late Dr Steven Tan. This medical certificate was to last 6 years from the time I started Primary 1 to 6. By the time I was in Secondary School, I had to another medical review to access my health status.

I never knew my medical condition, but I believe its something to do with some form of bone degeneration of some kind. I was weak, and I cannot run. Even when I walk, I can just fall and come home with deep cuts, and bruises on my legs, hands and bleeding. So my parents dotes on me. My sister, Winnie too. They never allow me to do anything. I never had to help out in housework.

When I met Benny and we were set for marriage, my mom told Benny about me. And ask him to take care of me for all the years to come. She said I was weak, physically.

From birth to date, I had 8 surgeries done on me. Not counting the numerous times I was in the hospital for a near fatal accident or a fall.

Of late, I watched Discovery Channel and saw many children from around the world with different medical problems surviving 10s of surgeries done on that..I measured up as a fraction of that pain they had to go through in life. I marvelled at how their parents had their lives turn rollercoaster up and down. And though I pitied them, but I applaud their courage to see through each day for their kids.

In all of that they often said "We don't fix what is not broken". They believed that their kids who are born with many rare medical problems as nothing to be fix because nothing is broken. But they fix whatever they could to make them adapt to life on their own when the parents are gone. To allow better movement or better breathing without the tubes.

When I looked back, my dad did the same thing too but in a different way and context. He cannot fortell the future nor understand what the world can do for me. So he left it up to God to decide my fate.

I live today because God lives in me. And each breath I take, I take it with alot of blessings from above. Because it is only when you believe, miracles do happen.

Be inspired and be blessed. For every trial and tribulation you are going through now in life, is part and parcel of life itself. Without faith, without love and without God, nothing is possible.

AMEN!

Amazing Grace

2010-09-19T08:57:00.002+08:00

here is the Cantonese version, which my dad loved..because my dad preaches in our church to the elderly, many uneducated Cantonese folks.

You probably heard this hymn sang by various song artists or in church and on TV sometimes with different movies and shows. But have you ever witnessed a song that draws into your inner soul? This was the song that converted Benny to Christianity. It was sang in church during one of the holy communion we had at the Church of Singapore at Joo Chiat Road. I attended this church since young and after knowing Benny, I brought him to this church too. Though Benny had been introduced to Christianity and once even attended the late Billy Graham's crusade rally at the National Stadium in the late 1970s, he never accept Christ as his personal saviour.

Some how, something probably just snapped! The words from this hymn reaches out to Benny. And before him, I have known many who accepted Christ when this hymn was sung.

For me, Christianity is my life. From the day I drew my first breath, my parents 'decreed' that Christianity is my religion. On paper that is : in my Birth Certificate. By the time I was in my teens, I attended our church's Bible Camp. My dad says its the only way for me to know Christ myself, first hand. It was a week long camp outside our comfort zone, our homes.

We stayed in one of schools. We slept on the tables lined up and stacked against each other. We are allow to bring a small pillow and blankets were provided.

We were divided into groups and tasked to handle the kitchen, bible study sessions etc.

I remembered it so clearly , even till today, how I met Christ and accepted Him to be my personal saviour. When the hymn was sang during the service, I knelt to pray and ask God to accept me, for all my past bad and past failure in things I do. And when He did, I broke down in tears...and suddenlly, I felt His presence, above my head, I felt like a piece of cloth covering my head, and I could hear the waves from the sea rushing to the shore(although the camp site was miles away from the sea) and I heard birds chirping away....

And there and then, I was His child...cleansed and made new again. That I might live my life now, renewed, refreshed. So that was my wish for Benny when we met and fell in love. That he might experience Christ the same way I did. So I brought him to Church. 6 months in our relationship and many Sundays in church later, he accepted Christ as his personal Saviour, and on the same hymn that brought me to Christ too.

How cool is that? And as my wish to God was answered, I never ask for the same hymn either. But God touched Benny the same way He touches me.

This morning, as I had my quiet time, Benny was reading the Bible and he suddenly said :

"Get that old hymn and a couple more, burn it in a CD and put it in my car. So I can listen to it everytime I drove. To remind me how much more I should praise God every day for His divine love and blessings for us!"

Benny and I belong to the 'old school' of music listeners. We don't have iPod or iPhone so we listened to songs in the car and I listened to it while at work in the store, playing in the background in my Mac laptop...

AMEN and be Blessed as you go thru each day and may His undivided attention and love seeks you out wherever you go and whatever you are doing!

I Wish you Love...

2010-09-17T08:31:00.004+08:00

A post dedicated to my Forever Boss, Miss Ong Su-Chzeng. A lady who till today, earns my deepest respect for being boss and friend and confidante.

There is so many things I could write about her and how she inspires me but I am just sharing some thoughts here. And photos of my time as her staff.

My friendship started with Su in the year 1995. She was the Regional Director for Publications in JF Tokyo. And was to leave Tokyo to start a new division in Singapore's office. She interviewed me over the phone. Read about her again here.

Su has high expectations of me and my work with Publications. But she was also like any loving mother who nurtures her child to the fullest potential. Working for her meant long hours in the office. She would expect me to start my day at 8:30am and go home by 8pm. In the beginning, it was difficult to juggle my time as a career woman and to be a wife to Benny and a mother to Natasha. We had no maid working for us back then.

Su taught me many life skills which at the time I was working for her, I found to be too intimidating but now, I realised she was moulding me to what I am today.

She would send me off to our Asian offices in Hong Kong, Kuala Lumpur, Taiwan, and also Indonesia. I travelled frequently to these countries to access the work flow. And all these time, I travelled alone. I had to learn the local language(some how), figure my way around the local transport system in that country and find my way to and fro the office and to the hotel I was staying. Su allows a day or 2 extended in my business trip each time. So I could go shopping, unwind and enjoy the company with the office staff outside working hours.

She used to tell me :

"Gina, work is important. During office hours, we WORK WORK WORK! But after office hours, cast off your work shoes and hats and let your hair down. Go and drink, have fun and enjoy the company of new friends!"

She taught me how to drink for business and for pleasure. But I usually don't drink at any business meeting. She taught me what to say and how to say in meetings with 'serious' officials.

I remembered my first maiden trip to Hong Kong. I was literally scared of my wits because I have NEVER travelled alone. Somehow, Su senses that. She booked a flight on the same plane with me. Told me the day before we leave :

"Gina, I am on the same plane with you to Hong Kong. But I will be in the Business Class, you are at the Economy Class. When we land, you go your way, I go mine. I will be staying at Furama Hotel and you will be staying at the Esceislor Hotel"

In a subtle way, she is watching me from afar. Some people find this an intrusion of privacy, others would have felt that the boss is not trusting her staff to do the job. But to me, I find this most encouraging. Here is Su, standing at a distance..watching and waiting. If I needed help, she's nearby, like a stone's throw away. In a reassuring way, her presence made me feel so much at ease.

At work in the Hong Kong's Jardine House, it was all work and no play. All too business like. But after that, she would chase me out of the office and say :

"Gina, go and figure out the MTR and find your way back to the hotel. I will meet you at 7pm at my hotel's lobby and we will go for dinner together"

I remembered in the next trip I made to Hong Kong a few months later, Su would make me change hotels in a matter of 2 days. Why? So I learn what to say to the hotel staff who are trying so hard to please me to make me stay back. Telling white lies here and there. Sometimes we need to lie a bit here and there. But lies that are said shouldn't get people into big trouble or problems.

I never could understand the rationale of changing hotels. Why make yourself comfortable in one and next day, you have to pack up and leave for another hotel further down the one you are staying? Only to find out years later when we were on a holiday in Genting Highlands, we had to change hotels due to run-down, poorly run or disorganised tour agency who took us for a ride!

My time in Jardine Fleming was 42 months or slightly over 3 years. When I tendered my resignation, Su had mixed feelings. Because one part of her wants to wish me success, another part of her wanted me to stay on. The year I left JF was also the years for many "Bear Runs" in the Stock and shares industry. She was tasked by our HQ to pick people to retrench and she had a talk with me and ask me to help her to choose who should go.

We sat down, and run through the short-listed personnel. And couldn't decide who should go. Because everyone was important to the department.

In the end, I offered to leave. And I gave her the excuse that Benny was earning well and he could support me. Though I was about to give birth to Melody, I needed to have an extra income too. I told her I could easily find jobs anywhere, its only whether I would want to work or not. An act of courage, Su thought I was being too modest and she started calling all the software companies to take me as their staff.

It is through this, she found a job for me. After my maternity leave, I would work at Quark Media House..the company that distributes Quark Xpress software in the region. I met my Irish Boss who heard so much about me from Su. And all he was interested in was how Melody look like, asking me for photographs of little Melody.

Like a chip off the old block, I would think that my Irish boss was like Su when she first interview me. She only ask about Natasha and photos of her. And everything outside work, just only interested to find out more about me!

I knew for sure, this is the place I should work after Su, after JF.

The day I left JF was a sad day in JF. Su and I couldn't bring ourselves to say Good Bye to each other. We were moping around in the office. The office staff thought she was cold towards me , after all, she often praise me in front of everyone.

The next day, Su went into the office, at 8:45am. The time she would often be in the office. Jennifer, our department's secretary would put her cup of coffee there..warmed for her. But somehow, Su felt it was cold, not the coffee. But her desk was empty. And she would often looked up and across the room and she would see me sitting at my desk. But I wasn't there. Not anymore.

It suddenly dawned on her that I was gone from the office. Su rang me later that day just to tell me this:

"Gina, my desk is empty. You always knew when I was sad and you always surprise me with little things. Now you are no longer here with me. How am I to go thru every day..."

It was the start of my long emails to her. Every other day, I would send her an email about life, about things and we kept in contact all these years. My friends wondered why I kept in contact with my ex bosses..all of which ended up as good friends. I believe that when you work someone, you don't just work for money or to gain experience. But along the way, you should find a friend in the many many streams in your life.

In one of the many inspirational notes I used to write to Su, this was one of her all time favourites.

God's Boxes
(writer, unknown)

I have in my hands two boxes
Which God gave me to hold
He said, “Put all your sorrows in the black,
And all your joys in the gold.”
I heeded his words, and in the two boxes
Both my joys and sorrows I store
But though the gold became heavier each day
The black was as light as before
With curiosity, I opened the black
I wanted to find out why
And I saw, in the base of the box, a hole
Which my sorrows had fallen out by
I showed the hole to God, and mused aloud,
“I wonder where my sorrows could be.”
He smiled a gentle smile at me.
"My child, they're all here with me."
I asked,"God, why give me the boxes,
"Why the gold, and the black with the hole?"
"My child, the gold is for you to count your blessings,
the black is for you to let go."

I later crafted the two boxes. And painted one black and the other gold. One Christmas, I gave these 2 boxes to Su and printed the above poem in a nice fancy paper for her.

I continue my notes to her via email for many years that followed. Then when I started blogging, I started writing these again. And I would send her an email to read my blog if I wrote about her. There is so much I have to say but for now, this is it. I would write again, maybe in a few day's time.

In memory of...

2010-09-16T09:24:00.005+08:00

A famous love quote that goes like this:

Better to have loved and lost than never to have love at all.

It took me a while to get what it meant because when I was younger, I have always been loved and still loved until one day that person I loved left me suddenly. Too late for goodbyes, no chance to say how much I adored her and loved her. This person is my late granny, my mother's mom.

I am not allowed to talk about her death in public like a blog. All I can say is that she died suddenly, and horribly. Why did I write this post today? Because next week its Mid Autumn Festival.. we celebrate this every year with her. Because its her birthday too. After her death in 1984, we stopped celebrating Mid Autumn Festival. We stop eating moon cakes altogether, always in memory of Ah Ma.

When she died, my world of perfection fell too. My Ah Ma was EVERYTHING TO ME. Although she couldn't speak English nor Mandarin. She spoke to me in Hokkien. And I learn to speak Hokkien from her. She told me all the time :

"Ting Ting, I will always love you. You are a very good girl. Very filial. And continue to be like that."

It took me years to get over her death. In the early years it was really difficult. It was even more difficult when I had Sidney who didn't understand what I was going through. All of us(my mom, relatives and all who are related to her by blood) grieved differently.

I know I have prayed at least a 1000 times asking God to heal me and to let me go on in life. Many friends rallied around us, giving us all kinds of support. But no one could understand our grief, our pain. A year later, my grandfather left us to meet his wife in Heaven. :(

My mom cried every day, and every wakeful moment she had. It was painful to watch this every day. I had to work and I come home to cold food or sometimes no food. My mom had no energy left to do anything.

Till today, sometimes certain events or things remind her of her parent's passing, she would bring it up again and talk and cry.

Some 25 years or so have passed...and we are still grieving..why? That's a clear sign how much you can love someone and still cannot let go.

When I sometimes "blog-hop" I get to read about a death of a loved one, I was compelled to write a long email or a comment to comfort that blogger. But I guess its best I write this in my own blog for ALL to read and understand what a person goes through when someone they loved just left them.

I still don't know what to say to someone who lost a loved one. But this much I can say :

Take time to cry. And Cry as much as you want to. Don't be worried how everyone sees you. Because no one can understand how much this person means to you.

And if it takes forever, then forever it will be. Because you do not stopped loving that someone. In fact, you loved them more. Because the days will pass by, empty. And its only natural for you to think of that someone. The things you use to do, or the things you plan to do.

Of all the goodbyes, good mornings, good nights you missed telling that someone and all the "how much I love you" that was missed, some are said and heard. And felt when that someone was still around.

Let no one decides how you should heal. We all heal differently. Some of us are better at it. While others are still coping.

As a friend, its often said "A friend in need is a friend indeed". To be a friend for your friend who has lost someone closed to them, is to lend your shoulders for tears, a hug with no words spoken, a tear shared together.

To me, that is what I called a Friend Indeed!

But at the end of this, I learn to thank God for putting me thru it all. I was able to understand and feel for others who went thru Hell on Earth when someone they loved left them.

It is through my pain of loosing Ah Ma taught me to be there for Sister Seok Buay when her beloved son, Boon left her. And my way of helping her to cope was to start Kitchen Capers. So she can use it to learn about email, Internet and write recipes to help her to cope. There is something to look forward to.

But alas, Sister Buay is still grieving..she is still coping. Boon has left her some 9 years ago.

Seen here : Bespectacled boy is the late Master Tan Boon Teik, next to him is Sister Seok Buay, his mom.

Boon was Sister Seok Buay and Brother Kim San's only child. I remember spending much time grieving with Sis Buay. I just stood there and cry with her. It was the best thing I could do at that time. And all she did was to repeat herself over and over again, telling me how she watch him breathe his last and passed on.

Years before I was working at Jardine Fleming, I met my boss Su Chzeng who also lost her better half some years back. When she came to work in Singapore, I could see her grief, through her 'heart'. And in small subtle ways, I would drop notes on her desk and send her inspirational poems or stories to help her to cope.

Her husband, the late Alan Booth, passed away in January 1993...2 years later, she came to Singapore to set up 'shop' with me at Jardine Fleming. I was the only person she employed to work with her at that time. By the time I left Jardine in 1998, our department grew to 10 persons.

Su Chzeng is still finding time to let go. And many people who never had loved ones leaving them could never understand why you need so long a time to get over it. Sometimes just out of the blue, Su would ring me and talk about past. And she knew that as always she could tell me anything and started tearing if she had to. And I wouldn't probe or poke fun at her. In fact, I may end up crying alongside with her.

I told Su that I haven't stopped crying for Ah Ma sometimes. Things I see, or do reminds me so much of lost time I could have done with my Ah Ma too.

I kept Ah Ma's memory alive by telling my younger cousins about her. What she was like and what she would want us to be. Its been 2 decades now..and I still cry for her once in a while.

To all my friends who reads my blog, I hope this post helps you to come into terms about grieving. If you have lost someone closed to you, you are not termed a weakling just because its been years and you are still crying.

In memory of..all who have lost but have loved..That's not lost. That's LOVE eternally.

Spicy, Sour and a hint of Sweetness

2010-09-13T16:50:00.005+08:00

We had mee siam again last week. Benny wanted it for weekend meals which he can have as midnight supper as and when he likes it. Here's the recipe my mom learnt from CC(Community Club run by People's Assn) donkey years ago.

We grew up eating this version and now we don't like those serve in most food courts. Its unique because this version has coconut milk in the stock.

These are packed for my parents, sister, brother in law and my niece. Yums!

This dish to fight for:

Serves 10 persons
Ingredients:
400g mee siam paste
50g chives, chopped
100g soya beans
10 hard boiled eggs
20 pcs of small tau pok/dried bean curd, diced
250ml tamarind juice (2 tbsp tamarind pulp mixed with 100ml water)
7 tbsp sugar (more or less according to your taste)
300g bean sprouts
10 small limes
600ml coconut milk(or Evaporated Milk)
900ml water
2 kg fresh grey prawns
2 packets of rice vermicelli(bee hoon), soaked to soften

Mee Siam paste:
10 cloves garlic
22 shallots
120g dried chillies (soaked to soften)
50g belacan/dried prawn paste (toasted and pounded)
120g dried shrimps (soak in water, soften)

400ml corn oil

Method for Paste

1. Put all the ingredients except the oil into a blender and blend into a fine paste.
2. Heat up the wok and add oil. Add the blended paste to fry over low heat till it is fragrant. Leave it aside till its cooled.
3. The paste should look very oily.
4. Note that though there is a lot of oil remaining, do not throw away this oil. As it is fragrant and to be used for frying the mee siam noodles.

Method for the rest
1. In the wok, add 200g of oily mee siam paste to heat. Add softened rice vermicelli(bee hoon) and stir fry till its dry and cooked.

2. Add bean sprouts to fry. Remove and set aside.

3. In a large pot, add water to boil. Add prawns to cook over high heat for 2 mins. Drain and remove all shells/heads of prawns, wash and devein. Set aside.

4. When the prawn stock comes to a boil again, add rest of mee siam paste to boil.
5. Once it starts boiling, add coconut milk, tamarind juice, soya beans and sugar. Turn heat to low and simmer for 25 minutes.
5. To serve, add hot gravy on fried rice vermicelli and garnish with egg, fried bean curd, prawns, chives and freshly squeezed lime juice.

New Moon

2010-09-05T10:44:00.004+08:00

Not the title of Twilight Saga part 2. More like someone like me would bother to make mooncakes. Trust me, and if you really know me in person, I am definitely not a Mooncake person. But I had to try out these new jelly moulds which I am selling in my shop. Many customers ask me "will the beautiful imprints on the jelly mooncakes?" or "will the jellies break when I remove it from the mould?"

I spent my lazy hot afternoon making these...yums! Now packing 4 big ones for my Mother-in-law. I made 2 flavours, Ume Plum (Green) and Strawberry (Pink).

Here's the recipe for it.

Ingredients
1000ml water
150ml Evaporated milk(I use Carnation Evaporated milk)
2.5 tbsp konnyaku jelly powder
200g fine sugar
2.5 tbsp Pastarom Strawberry Paste(*)

* Substitute with Jupe Ume Plum Concentrated paste for the green colour

Method
1. Add jelly powder into the water and whisk till it disappears into the water.
2. Add sugar and turn on the stove to boil till everything is melted.
3. Turn off the fire, stir in the milk and fruit paste till its evenly pink or green
4. Pour melted jelly into plastic moulds and leave it inside the fridge to chill till firm.
5. Remove the jelly and serve cold...

yums..

For Variety, you can use other flavourings from the Jupe range or even the Pastarom types. I prefer not to use essences because the taste is very artificial and more 'plasticky' if you put in too much. Plus, if you use essences, you need to add food colouring. Whereas if you use Jupe fruit pastes or Pastarom, you do not need to add colouring.

Once upon a time...

2010-08-31T10:39:00.008+08:00

No, this is NOT the starting line for a fairy tale story. More like me looking back in wonder. Of the days I used to bake and sell my cookies, little muffins and low sugar fruit cakes. And then even longer back in time, I used to cook and sell my sambal pastes. Not so much for the profit of it, but more to practice and hone in my chilli pastes perfection.

And ever since I started Kitchen Capers forum, I slowly stop hiding my recipes. I started to share more. And when I started teaching culinary, I stopped hiding it altogether. Now all my recipes can be found everywhere. Namely in my own KC forum, sometimes you will find it at C2C.Net, an American all CHEFs website and forum, or the occasional food blogger's pages, at MCDC(Malaysian Cake Decorator's Community) and even at the Human Flower Project website.

The next step was to get some of these PRINTED because not everyone is on a computer. Call me old-school whatever, I still like to refer to instructions on paper, printed media..not the Internet. I know its much easier to search for it.

The good thing to report is Wiltshire Australia has ask for my permission to print my recipes onto a recipe card. And these will be distributed with their bake ware products. And its sold worldwide, or at least to the Western world. In Asia, Wiltshire Singapore will do likewise and distribute their Bake ware products to Thailand, Hong Kong, Indonesia..

I have kept really busy and literally on my toes. So if you go to Kitchen Capers website and don't see any major movement in my classes, its because I have been stretched really thinly lately.

By October, our classes at Robinsons will be uploaded at KC website and linked to Robinson's website too. In due time, I will be getting more baking instructors to teach with me at Robinsons. I cannot run the classes alone as I have to run my shop too. But when you see the classes offered by KC, it will have a variety for you to choose..from simple cooking to complex traditional cuisines to baking for beginners to beyond.

I hope to engage an enrichment school to run baking classes for little Tots from 3 years to older kids at 12 years old. I just wanted to make this appeal to all who have been loyally supporting me all these years, be it in my classes or my forum and my shop too.

on the lighter side...here's some old photos of the stuff I use to bake and sell. These recipes and its secrets will be taught when I teach at Robinsons. See you...

Jade lion (Gummy candy)

Home made Cheese Foccacia

Chocolate Mint Cookies..the secret ingredient is the Polo Mint used in this recipe

Beef Noodles...NOTE: Teaching this in November 2010 at Robinsons..My late grand dad heirloom recipe.

Family Secrets

2010-08-28T11:42:00.007+08:00

Its not a big secret when it comes to cooking good food for your family and friends. Today, Benny wanted to eat Hokkien Hay Mee T'ng(Prawn Noodles soup) so he has been stocking up our kitchen and pantry with many 'secret' ingredients.

Ru-shin asked me for our family recipe at Facebook, I decided to share this online on my blog as it can be accessed by everyone.

Here's my mom's secret to a good Hokkien Hay Mee T'ng..as good as the ones at Whitley Road in Singapore..!
It took me over 2 hours to cook this..Just one dish!. Talk about the labour of love!

Serves a family of 10 persons
Ingredients for stock
3 litre of water
2 kg of large tiger prawns
2 pcs Dried sole fish(deep fried till crispy, drained)

70ml Fish sauce
2 tbsp sesame oil
1 pc of brown slab sugar

4 pcs of fried fish cake, sliced
2 packets of yellow noodles(from supermarket)
200g bean sprouts
400g water spinach(kang kong)
200g lean pork

garnishings
toasted onions
toasted garlic bits
onion oil
sliced red chilli

Method to cook the stock
1. Use a large stock pot, add water to boil.
2. Once it boils, add all the prawns in to cook over high heat for 3 mins.
3. Quickly drain and dump the cooked prawns in a large bowl of ICED water. Leave it to stand for 5 mins.
4. While the water is still boiling, add the rest of the stock ingredients to cook.
5. Drain prawns and peel away all shells, heads, set side the shells.
6. Devein, sliced prawns into 2, keep chill till ready to serve.
7. In a wok, add 50ml of cooking oil to heat. Add prawn heads/shells to fry for 10 mins.
8. Pour everything back into the stock to cook over medium heat for 30 minutes.

Method to cook the lean pork
1. When stock is boiling, add chicken fillet to cook for 10 mins.
2. Remove and drain. Cool completely before slicing.
3. Set aside for garnishing.

Method to cook the vegetables
1. Use a wok to heat up with water.
2. Once boiling, blanch bean sprouts for 2 mins, drain and set aside.
3. Let it boil again..then add water spinach. Blanch for only 30 secs as water spinach cooks instantly.
4. Drain and set aside.

5. Use the wok of water to briefly blanched the yellow noodles to remove the alkaline smell.

To serve
1. Add desired amounts of noodles in a bowl.
2. Garnish with vegetables, prawns, pork, fish cake slices.
3. Add generous amount of hot soup over it.
4. Garnish with toasted onions, garlic and serve with chilli on the side.

Notes
The soup will turn red if you use Black Tiger Prawns.
If you use grey prawns, the soup will remain clear.
Leftover soup stock can be kept in the fridge for upto 1 week.

Lord, I Give you my Heart

2010-08-26T09:33:00.007+08:00

I wake up every day at around 7:30am. Breakfast is just a cup of hot coffee with cream, sugar. And I sat down to start my day at home. Reading emails, surfing the NET, research, etc.

Often enough, I spend 15 minutes in total isolation, quietness and this is the time I spent with Him. With God. I will tell Him of what I wanted to do, and I would ask Him to help me through each day. And I would tell Him about my friends. Those who needed help in small ways or big. And I would also tell Him about my family, my mom, my dad, my sister, my aunt or my uncle or my cousins who lived faraway from me. To bless them and to keep them safe. And when I ask Him to keep them safe, He often makes me cry, to shed tears. And these are not tears of sadness..but tears to touch my heart and rest my soul that knowing that He is watching over them, every moment of their lives.

And lastly, I would tell Him my troubles. All the things I feared and in ending, I ask only for one thing for myself :

His undying Love and Strength that keeps me going. To do the things I do each day. To keep smiling even a storms blocks my path.

And with that, I ended my quiet time with God. I felt re-charged with full battery life. Ready to conquer the day's struggles. And when the night comes, I rested again.

The next day, my day starts at 7:30am. A cup of coffee and 15 minutes with Him. And I say to Him

"Thank You, Father..for answering my prayers again. Thank you for each day you have given me. The joys it brings, the sadness sometimes..but you never fail me to show me that out of sadness, I get peace and joy in ways I cannot comprehend sometimes. And each day You teach me what I must do and how I can learn from it.

In Jesus' Name I pray, AMEN!"

My dad was the person who first showed me what is quiet time really meant. I would sometimes wake up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom..and in the corner of the living room, I would see a shadowy figure, knees on the floor, hands clutched together, head bowed...in prayer.

This happened years ago when I was still a teenager. He would sleep early every night around 8pm and wakes up at around 3am. And he would spend his first wakeful minutes with God. In silence, in prayers and I remembered at that time we have a small Pomeranian named Jimmy. Jimmy would sit by him and when my dad had finish his prayers, he would lift up his hands in the air to praise God..

and little Jimmy would sit up straight, wagging his tail vigorously...

And everyday without fail, my dad would spend his early hours with God. Then he would go back to bed for a short nap. By 5am, he is fully awake and starts his day.

As the years past, I remember his posture, this moment in time. And my dad always tell me,

"Quiet time means your time with God. With Him alone, no disturbances from outside, no Radio playing in the background, no phone rings...All He wants is 15 minutes of your time. Is that so hard to do? He gives you 1440 minutes a day, all He wants is your 15 minutes. No matter how busy you are, the things you have to do each day, can you set aside just 15 minutes out of your 1440 minutes for Him?"

and my dad continues to say :

"In 15 minutes, He gives you the strength for day, hope for tomorrow and the world at your feet. So you can carry on and be blessed by it all. And in turn, you can bless others because He blesses you each day..."

My dad continues to inspire me this way. And though I don't live with him anymore, my mom says he still wakes up at 4am and still have his quiet time. Now that he has fully retired from church as a English/Mandarin translator for the publications department, he spend more time reading the Bible in 2 languages and is learning Hebrew so that he can read the Bible in Hebrew too.

AMEN!

May this post inspire you to continue your daily walk with God and your quiet time with Him.

My Favourite Cupcake

2010-08-17T10:03:00.005+08:00

The only cupcake I grew up knowing and eating and loving it was this..

the humble Chinese Steamed Egg cake. Most of the times, you will see this in a large bowl set and often placed on altars for prayers. Sometimes you get to buy these little cupcakes from a local bakery or cake shop. Its often decorated with a little red dot.

It reminds me of my early childhood years. The only type of 'cupcake' that my mom would make for us. And it was steamed. Just 3 basic ingredients ; Eggs, Sugar, flour. I remember seeing her holding a large bowl under her arm, with a whisk on the other hand, whisking eggs and sugar non stop. She would paused to check the consistency and if its not up to her standard, she whips again. Then she would sift the flour into the bowl of whipped and fluffy batter and pour into little cups to steam.

It was just so simple. No additives, no preservatives, no chemicals used. And this often reminds me of what my doctor told me time and time again :

"Mdm Choong, remember how our mothers used to make cakes? without baking soda, baking powder or any chemicals? You should learn the old ways and learn to bake cakes without these chemicals. Its harmful to your health. Its time you cut back on using man-made chemicals in your food"

And so my journey starts...to revamp all the recipes I knew and learn from various places, books or websites and rework it without chemicals. Its seems like a life long journey..but I am seeing the results of this.

For the last 8 years, I stopped taking baked foods that has baking powder/soda in it. I have not picked up any flu virus or cold virus from anyone who was ill. Somehow it boosts my immunity. Maybe its a thought, you may say..but I see the end results of all that I have tried. I don't fall sick at all. Should I take MC from work, it must be really serious.

Okay, I do get the occasional food poisoning from eating food that don't agree with my stomach. This often happens whenever I travel and eat out on my own. I tend to get a bit too adventurous sometimes.

And whenever I visit the doctor, he praises me for making that effort. And thus, whenever I teach, I omit all the chemicals in the recipes too. And show to the students that without all the baking soda or powder, the cake still rises.

I had to try this to see....I added Barry Callebaut cocoa powder into the egg batter just to try out.. the balloon effect is caused by over whipping the eggs..

A twist from an old favourite.

Chocolate Bomb Bomb
Recipe by Gina Choong

Ingredients
8 eggs(55g each minus shell)
250g fine sugar
210g Cake Flour
30g Barry Callebaut Cocoa powder

Method:
1. In a mixing bowl, add eggs and sugar to whip till frothy and fluffy..about 15 minutes.
2. Sieve cocoa powder into cake flour
3. Turn off the mixer, fold in gently so as not to break down the air bubbles.
4. Pour into cupcake liners to the brim(full)..and steamed over high heat for 10 minutes.
5. Serve warm...

Food Glorious Food

2010-08-14T19:36:00.006+08:00

I became extremely curious about food, not as much as eating it. But more like how its made, cooked or prepared. All the credits goes to Benny. He would often tell me of a certain food joint that serves the best kuay teow or the best char siu pau and ask if I knew how to cook it.

So that started my interest in it. He loves Kong Bak Pau or Stewed Pork Bun. Its a steamed bun(pau), stuffed with stewed pork belly. Today I have time, lots of it. So decided to make some for supper tonight.

Home made mantou are NOT the prettiest thing to look at. But who cares? It tastes as good as the real thing from stalls in Singapore. That is what counts, plus, its made with lots of sweat, pain and most of all : LOVE

Here's my mantou recipe for you to try at home. :

Plain Mantou
Recipe by Gina Choong

Ingredients
500g Hong Kong Flour(sometimes called Pau Flour)
100g fine sugar
1 tbsp instant yeast
250ml water
1.5 tsp Double Action Baking Powder

2 tbsp vegetable shortening

Method
1. In a mixing bowl, add water, followed by flour and the rest of the ingredients, except Shortening
2. Using a hook paddle, turn on the mixer to knead for 5 mins or until dough forms and leaves the sides of the bowl.
3. Remove mixer bowl and cover the bowl to proof in a warm place for 30 minutes.
4. When the dough has risen, double in size, remove and knead/roll on a floured table(flour it with HK Flour)
5. Cut into rounds, spread a little shortening on top, fold into half and set aside to proof for another 15 minutes.

6. Then heat up a steamer, add the mantou on it and steam on high for 5 minutes. Remove when its done.

7. Best to keep inside a ziplock bag to prevent it from drying out.

Kong Bak
Recipe By Gina Choong

Ingredients
1kg pork belly(local word is 3 layer pork 三层肉 ) : cut into 3 cm lengths..
1 pc Cinnamon stick
2 pcs star aniseed
3 pcs cloves

100ml Dark Soya sauce
50ml Light Soya sauce
300g sugar
500ml water

Method:
1. In a wok add spices to fry till its fragrant. Then add sauce mix to cook till it boils.
2. Add in pork belly to cook.
3. Transfer into a slow cooker and cook for 2 hours till tender.
4. Serve with steamed mantou or great with plain porridge or rice.

Notes
If you have lots of sauce leftover, do not discard this. Keep it in an airtight container to be stored in the freezer. Keeps indefinitely. To use, just thaw, add water to boil. Then add meat to slow cook again.

and lastly, I also baked some bread today..made my home made kaya..showing you pictures only..recipes are all at KC Forum.

Dinner rolls with 2 types of home made kaya
Green is Pandan Kaya
Brown is Gula Melaka Kaya...smooth, creamy, and smells of good Gula Melaka from Malacca(a gift from my student)

More dinner rolls..plain, nothing inside and so Benny complains..where's the meat??? That was how I ended up making Kong Bak Pau

Pandan kaya was spread on the dough, roll up and made into Pandan kaya rolls

Gula melaka kaya was stuffed into the dough, rolled up, sealed and baked inside a loaf pan.

The breads were for me to 'rehearse' as my students pestered me endlessly for a Bread workshop. Its been over 3 years I stopped making bread at home..Why? Because I am just getting too tired, and too lazy for it. No one eats bread at home...except me. Benny isn't a bread person, more like a pau person..

Well, today, I made everyone happy.

Eat and be Happy

2010-08-10T08:52:00.010+08:00

Yesterday was Singapore's National Day, 45 years of independence. 45 years of blood and tears, sweat and toil, where our Leaders help to build and shape the nation to what it is today. And what better way to celebrate this day than to spend it with loved ones.

Benny and I decided to close our store earlier at 7pm. While I stayed at home the whole day to prepare a feast with my parents, sis and my brother in law, Benny worked at the store till 6 plus and closed to come home for dinner.

I had the whole day to myself, so I decided to make a few desserts that the family loved. First of all is Huat Kueh, the traditional rice flour steamed cakes which my mom loved to eat but never found the time to make.

It was made with the Bai Mi Jiu Liang or White Rice Wine residule. And it took another 8 hours to ferment. I had it steamed at 5pm. Just in time for dinner.

I realised that I didn't have those tiny tea cups anymore so had to use mini cupcake liners for it. Turn out to be such a pretty bunch. But later removed the liners ...

Next is Gui Ling Grass Jelly dessert..this is fail proof. From a packet of pre mix which I sell in my store. A hit with all at home. We had this with Maple syrup instead of honey. It was really good. Especially after dinner..smooth, silky and cold.

And lastly, something my mom also liked..the sago pearls in rich gula melaka syrup. I didn't make a lot. Just enough for tasting. Its only after I made it, I found out I didn't have coconut cream. The shops near my home are closed. So I use pandan sago pearls for the flavour and added more gula melaka instead.

We had Steamboat and Teppanyaki for dinner. Everything was prepared at home. For the steamboat soup, we had Herbal Chicken soup on one side and Curry chicken gravy on the other side.

Teppanyaki was just BBQ of chicken wings, shabu-shabu Beef, sausages, prawns, squids, etc.

our dog, Jing Jing had to be locked up in the balcony because my mom is slow in movement. And Jing Jing is very hyper. After dinner around 8 plus..had to show you my cuckoo clock :

side track..this is our third Cuckoo Clock. We loved this kind of clocks..because it serves not just to keep time but be a part of the home and furnishing.

Jing Jing getting a rub behind her ears when we cleared the table and no traces of food tidbits for her..that will do, she will probably say..no food, but a good rub!

After that, I just plonked in bed and watched re-runs on DVD. Melody and I watched Oliver! the Musical.

Another door opens...

2010-08-03T11:27:00.004+08:00

I will be offering all of my classes at Robinsons(Centrepoint Shopping Centre at Orchard Road) by November 2010. So my classes at home will ceased by end October 2010.

When you visit Robinsons at Centrepoint sometime end of the year, you will notice that Kitchen Capers logo on the glass panel at the Baking Studio at Level 5..houseware department.

Kitchen Capers will be hosting culinary classes there. Almost every day. Personally, there is no change of my current teaching schedule. Instead of running these classes at home, I now do it at Centrepoint. At least now, my students cannot tell me I am very far away or there is no bus or MRT to my place.

I will teach on Saturdays and Sundays there. Together with me will be 3 other home chefs. Each of them will specialise in a particular subject which they do best.

Meng Choo will teach once a month at Robinsons. She will impart her sugar craft skills to the students. You can see her work via her blog

Halimah, a fellow KC forum member will also be teaching at Robinsons. She will cover Vegan Baking(no eggs, no butter) and also Healthy lifestyle cooking.

Sandy Goh will be teaching baking and also sugarcraft on cakes, cookies.

For me, I will teach baking, and cooking(mostly Asian cuisine). And the occasional Fondant figurines modelling too. I am planning to run a series of noodles making and bread making classes at Robinsons in the near future.

Here's how equipped the baking studio is :

This, to me, is another door open for me. I have always wanted a place of my own to teach culinary. Although the Wiltshire baking studio is owned by Robinsons, I was given the chance to run my courses there and to broadcast about my store at the same time.

All of us have set aside our time to plan our classes from November 2010 till January 2011. We will still planning more for the months ahead.

The classes will be Full Hands-on. Maximum intake per class is 8 persons. Minimum to start is 4 persons. Every student will be getting a goody bag when they come for class. There will be free flow of freshly brewed tea or coffee for all students.

The whole purpose was to teach, to impart our skills to everyone and yet have a comfortable and cozy environment almost like home.

Stay tuned for further updates via the main Kitchen Capers website this October.

This is yet another milestone for Kitchen Capers..especially when she just celebrated her 6th year in WWW. Each year, a new door opens for her to grow.

Thanks to all who have supported her in the forum, in the shop and in all my classes since 2004.

God Bless You!

Here Kitty , Kitty(Hello Kitty Fans)

2010-07-30T09:48:00.004+08:00

I am doing this for a friend who has collected a bedroom full of Hello Kitty stuff. I don't even know what is the term or word to use for this.

I have reserved a shelf space at my KC store at Kallang Bahru to display her 'toys' for sale. These are stuff she collected since young with that dream that one day when she marries someone, has a home of her own, she would use it. But when the day finally came, she couldn't find the heart to open it and use it. For years she kept it as collector's items. Over time, she collected so much that now all of it sits stacked up in boxes in one bedroom.

With much 'pain' she says, she has to part with it to make space for baby or family planning.

Since I am doing her a favour, I cannot give her a full rack space for this, except a shelf space. These are sold while stocks lasts. Each week, she will bring down different things she feels she can let it go from her private collection. All the items are authentic Hello Kitty stuff.

Sorry, I cannot quote prices here as I don't intend to keep an inventory for this. Whatever sales i collected from this will be returned to her.

The sale starts today ..here is a group shot of what she brought down. I have ask her to only bring things related to kitchen or bake ware. No toys, no handbags, no watches.

Despite this, she still didn't have the heart to sell some of the items..she took home 3 waste paper baskets yesterday. And gave me the excuse that "oh, these I can use for my baby's room!"

Waiting and watching...

2010-07-19T09:08:00.004+08:00

Lyrics of the christian hymn : Lifetime Loving You(Translated from the Chinese singing)

So precious, my Jesus,
how sweet and pure is Your love.
You have drawn me deeper in love with You,
my joy is filled loving You.
With all my love, i will worship You.
With all my life, glorify Your name.
i give my life, never turn away.
i will love You all my days.

Benny has been working round the clock. Not just for the company he is working with, but also trying to find time with me. As much as I wanted him to be by my side, I had to allow him the rest he needed running around so many places in a day.

For the last couple of days, I work alone in the shop. I closed the shop myself. And went home alone. And he is at work still. And he would ring me from work and check if I was safely home. And would ask me about my day at the shop. Waiting and watching over me from afar.

On Saturday(17 July 2010), our girls helped out at the store. He has to return to work so he fetched me to the store at 7pm. After we closed the store, I took the girls for a buffet dinner. Right into our main course, he rang me to say :

"I am in a Road Accident. I knocked down a motorcyclist. He's going to the hospital and I am to go to the Police station to make a report"

My heart sank! And I ask if he was okay. He said he was okay. Then he hung up.

I told the girls..and we were all worried for him.
Then I sms him and ask "Is the guy badly injured? Are you ok?"

He replied "I am ok. No Blood, the guy is conscious. I think should be fine".

In unison, my girls and I send him an sms saying this :

"Everything will be okay. I love you!"

When he came back on Saturday, he looked tired and a bit disillusioned. He came and ask me for a hug. Which I gladly gave him because he needed it. And he tells me he was worried and tired and didn't had his dinner. So I missed a couple of minutes watching "Bones" on Channel 5 and cook Kway Teow soup for him.

The next day, the girls went to church, and I got up early again and cook a wholesome warm lunch for him. After lunch he went back to bed. I went to the shop alone and again close the shop alone again.

When I came home, he has left the house already..to work. And as always, I stay up late watching re-runs on DVD so I can be kept awake to wait for him.

He came home at around 12:40am. And I had brewed some tonic for him. He lovingly ask me about my day at the shop. If I had met any difficult customers or had any problems. Its a point I learnt over time never to question him about his work. He feels frustrated talking about work at home. He just want to go home, unwind and nothing about work from the office.

I told him I prayed for his safety and God will keep him safe. Which He did. Almost all the accidents he got into, Benny often comes home a bit shaken at first..and not a single scratch or mark on his body. And the folks he accidentally hit, were also safe and sound..maybe a bit shaken from the initial shock 'treatment'. No injuries of any kind.

For the Lord, our God is merciful, His grace endures forever. For as long as we live on earth, we shall give Praise to His name. Because it is Him and only Him that sees us through each day of our lives. And He alone decides who, when and how of things should happen.

I prayed everyday for them (Benny, my girls) for their safety outside, where I cannot see them or watch over them in a distance. That only God can. And everyday, every moment, God assures me again and again and answers my prayers daily.

AMEN!

Read my past post on how my prayers were answered every day..an accident at home that would have made me a widow, but our God loves us all...

http://tasteoftime.blogspot.com/2008/08/as-i-lay-me-down-to-sleep.html

In Memory of ....

2010-07-07T10:10:00.005+08:00

A Legend, for Christ, for everyone.

Recently we have a family gathering at my cousin's place at Bishan, Singapore. To celebrate my aunt's 70th Birthday. I chanced upon a book and ask Aunty about it and she said it was written and compiled by the church in USA in memory of our late uncle Daniel Chen. Testimonies and writing of his work and by others whom he has inspired and touched so many people that they pooled together and wrote a book in memory of him.

As I flipped thru the pages, I was surprised that my last words to him was also published. Which my cousin, Dagmar read at his funeral wake. Dagmar emailed us all asking us to write a short note for her to read it out loud during church service. I remember writing something on behalf of everyone here in Singapore.

This is what I wrote, published in this book. I hope you can read the words.

This is the book the church in USA published in memory of him. It was mainly in Chinese with some pages in English. Especially those pages written by his two Daughters, Jenny and Joy. The memories of their daddy, who he was to them and how he inspired them to be soldiers for Christ.

My uncle, Daniel Chen was a god-fearing man. And lived his days serving God in the ways he knows. When he moved to USA with his wife, my aunt Katherine, he was already serving God in small ways. With time and space, God moved him to serve him in church full time.

I never quite understood about the tremendous work he did in USA. But I remembered fondly how he was an uncle to me..from afar. Despite the distance, he loved all of us and knew what we were doing. Aunty Katherine would ring my mom and chatted over the phone..just to find out who is doing what. All the other siblings of my aunt would update her with photos of new borns in the family, who is in school, who just found a new boyfriend or girlfriend.

When I met Benny, Aunty Katherine and Uncle Daniel prayed that I found the right guy. I remembered when I had Natasha, I was going through a very difficult pregnancy..Uncle Daniel fasted and prayed for us. Whenever anyone of us in Singapore was in need, Uncle Daniel never failed to pray for us. If we are ill, he prayed for God's healing, if we are sad, he prayed for comfort. If we are anxious about our exams and school results, he prayed for peace from God.

Whenever he visited Singapore through the ministries he was hosting or invited to, he made a point to visit us all, dine with us and prayed with us. Time and time again, he shared many Godly testimonies of life, of little ventures, of failures and often said that God is merciful, He sees all, hears all and heals all. If only we know that we only need to seek Him in prayer. He will answer each and everyone of them.

In all my years of growing up and knowing Uncle Daniel, I never once see him in tears or anguish, nor sad or unhappy. He wears a smile on his face..all the time!

When we were on our honeymoon to USA in 1988, we stayed in Holiday Inn, LA. It was winter and very cold. Uncle Daniel drove Aunty Katherine to our hotel just to meet us. Just even just to say Hello and to give us a big hug. That was the Uncle I knew. Who never cared about weather or bitter winter coldness, all he could think of was "my little niece is in town, I got to go and meet her". In his eyes, I was always that little niece he knew.

When Natasha was born, he pass by Singapore during one of the transits visits to Asia. He took some time off to visit us and carried Natasha for hours on end. Natasha warmed up to him immediately. Because Uncle Daniel was a gentle and loving man. He adored her and said to me "Its like when I was carrying Jenny when she was a baby".

We knew from the depths of our hearts that he was a great dad. And loved all children, his and others alike. That was how he was able to serve in the children's ministries for years. And taught many to serve in the Children's ministries.

He contracted cancer in the colon in 2001. I remembered I was still working. All I could think of and felt was tears. How could someone like him had cancer? I know all of us in Singapore cried for him. And was worried for him.

Uncle Andrew sponsored his trip to Singapore to visit us for a month. It is through this visit he tells us that he does not fear death because it meant that he is going to meet his Boss, the one who have been blessing him and give him big fat bonus every year. Even so, uncle Daniel was cheerful and told us not to fear or worry for him. Because he was working for God and God will keep him safe, keep him well.

He had to finish his works for God. To teach and to inspire young people to serve God in the field. And he went on to sing Christian songs for children.

He told us to be brave, not for ourselves. But also for others. To have illness of any kind, is to be human. Because God made us humans. Sickness and health comes to all. Just as the rain that falls on good ground and bad. Good things come to all, just like bad things come to all too. While its easy to blame and point fingers, we must not fall into this trap. But to take stock of whatever time we are left with, how to use it effectively, fruitfully and spend every minute doing the things for others.

He left us with his inspirations, his hopes and he stopped chemotherapy and left his pain and illness to God. The doctors and physicans who took care of him told him without treatment, his life would end in a manner of 6 months to 1 year. But he proved to them that God decides when and where and how.

Uncle Daniel continued to live his life fruitfully for another 3 years or so. Enough time for him to walk down the aisle with Jenny when she married Jason. And for him to witness and enjoy Grand-daddy-iness with Nathan, his grandson. Even so, to approve the marriage of his other daughter, Joy to Josh.

He never show fear of death and never once told us he was worried about death. He once said that he only fear that his wife, aunty Katherine will be lonely without him. He only worries for her.

Even to the last moments of his life, Uncle Daniel praised God and lift up his hands to surrender to God. When news of his death reaches Singapore, my mom wept unconsolably. She adored him and loved him as if he was her baby brother. My mom spent many days in tears for him. We had to consoled her and told her that he's now in a better place, no pain and he will be waiting for us on the other end.

Even in this book, there was photo of him with my mom. My mom loved him dearly. And Thank God I was able to bring her to visit him in mid 1996 in California, USA where they stayed.

One of the things he left with us was his legacy, and we must remember always to give thanks to God. For all good things and also for bad things. Because it is through "bad things" we are better. We know what to do, what not to do. We learn to give more. And we loved more. And we learn to take stock of life and all its insecurities and look up and forward. To inspire everyone with whom we passed by along the way.

AMEN!

May you be Blessed by God..

Thank you, Uncle Daniel, for teaching us and blessing us. Even now, from up there, we know you still watches over us.

Love Is... Revisited

2010-06-28T10:01:00.003+08:00

Come What May performed by Ewan McGregor and Nicole Kidman from the Musical "Moulin Rouge"

I was bored and couldn't sleep a few nights before. So I pick up the DVD I had and decided to watch "Moulin Rouge". It was a good musical that I bought some years back and watch it with my girls when Natasha was still in her mid teens. I watched many musicals with her and told her a little bit of this musical. The original one made years ago wasn't so appealing due to the songs they played. This one was made using songs that were a little modern, remixed for the musical.

In this movie, Ewan sang this song "Come What May", one of the most appealing words sang was this:

Come what may
Come what may
I will love you until my dying day

sigh... I should be watching this movie and going ga-ga than to watch Twilight. After all, Twilight is for teens, Moulin Rouge, more adult I guess.

Love is..revisited today. Because today is my birthday. Yes, 28th June. The days that draws near to today, Benny has been calling me, sms-ing me and spoke to me in the gentleness I used to hear when we were dating. These days, our voices seemed loud and uncouth. Not that we are scolding each other. But maybe because as time passes, we think we understand each other better, no more sweet nothings and sweet sounded voices.

So it was really nice to hear him speak to me this way again. He knew what pleases me and what I like for my birthday. I loved to eat fruits especially Lychees, durians and mangoesteens. I am not a cake person nor one who likes birthday parties or candlelight dinners. And most gifts to me ended up in the store room, stashed away and forgotten.

I still have the Etienne-Aigner designer watch set he bought for me in 1998 when he went to Chicago on business. I never wore it and kept it all these years. In the past 2 to 3 years he would give me $500 worth of Gift vouchers from Isetan or Tangs. I always ended up using it to buy things for our girls. And I bought nothing for myself.

So these days, he knows that its best to buy me something I want, then I would use it. Then to give me something which I can exchange it to give it to someone else.

But the days ahead will be hard on us. He will be working round the clock and won't not be able to swing by to have lunch with me nor fetch me to work. He also told me that some nights I may have to close the shop myself. But he tells me:

"I would rather come and close up the shop with you. But I am really tired. Some weekends, if you do not have class, you may have to go and work too. Because I have to."

In my reply to him :

"Is this permanent?"

He said "No. Just for 2 months from July to August. I would rather spend time with you"

So I said to him "Thank God! My days ahead will be brighter knowing you are always thinking of me. Even though you can't be with me"

But my days ahead will be no less busy than his. But he assures me that we will walk this path together. While we are kept busy, he would always listen to my grunts and moans about life in general. And he will find time whenever he can, just to drop by even just to close the shutters from the store.

Simply Her

2010-06-21T12:37:00.006+08:00

My store has been featured in the July issue of Simply HER magazine. Actually this is the 2nd time they have featured Kitchen Capers. Once was 2 years ago when my store was just an online shop.

Read my April 2008 article about it

Although I was a bit 'upset' that they wrote it that my store was like a "Hardware store". If they wrote that it looks like a "Econ-mini mart" sort, I still can be happy. But a hardware store??? Our window display only flour, and bakeware in full view. The front frontage shows rows of colourful muffin liners and Fondant.

I hope the article does us some justice to bring new customers to visit us.