Dec 8, 2011

I think of you all the time...


I Wish you Love, sung by Lisa Ono

I have been extremely busy with work, with my classes and with family, with the people I love. Ever since Benny quit his day job to work with me in the business, I became even more busy than ever. Maybe because I was able to do all the things I wanted to do for the business now.

But having him by my side meant we saw each other day in day out. We do things together. We have every meals together. And anywhere I wanna go, he said he will drive me there. He told his friend "I am like having honeymoon everyday"..and I told my friends that I am going on a date every day whenever I go to work.

There were things I wanted to do with him when we first got married. When we first met, and loved. But never in my wildest dreams was to have him by my side. Benny was a go-getter, strong headed. I was a risk-taker, bull headed(most of the times!). And I think we couldn't work together.

He reminded me so many times why he took out all his savings to start the shop. It was for him to retire from working for others and he still thinks we can work together. With his vast retail merchandising experience and with my risk taking marketing skills, my teaching skills and I seems to-know-everything skills, he said we could ROCK this part of the world.

In the first month, we argue alot. In fact every other day. I have struggled for 3 years alone in the business. He just joined. I don't care how many donkey years he had in retailing, but I had to have my own way of doing things and he has his too. One big fight lead us to think about us working for the good of the business and our love for each other.

And then, i took a step back. Turn to God and ask Him to show me and to teach me where I have gone wrong.

And God reminded me of my place in his life. That I was always the supporting figure in his life. Someone who stood in the background. Someone who always there when he needed help, when he needed love and attention. And there, I cried to God...

I went to Benny and I cried. And I said SORRY. And we shouldn't fight each other. But we should learn to re-live our life together again. As we need to work together every day. We should take a step back each time we need to raise our voices at each other.

Then Benny told me that at the height of his anger at that moment, he said things he shouldn't have. In turn, he need to go to God and ask for forgiveness too. And God showed him that the Key ingredient to a successful and happy marriage is to be able to fight and argue and still find love in it.

And since that fateful day we fought, we never looked back. Whenever I felt upset of the things he did, I would tell him there and then. And not bottled up inside all the time and let it grow and make a monster out of me. And if he wants things done his way, he learn to say "I need your advice, what do you think?"

and in turn, I became more mellow, more humble ..

They say that Love is a 2 way street...I believe it so. Because if you give and never get, you stop giving. Benny and I have been married for 23 years. In these 23 years there were always moments of love, moments of sadness, moments of anger. The good stuff we keep..the bad stuff we also keep but we never let it go. And that builds up over the years. We just think its okay to just cover it up like a carpet over dust.

But God told us to let it go, let it out. And He made us do that when we worked together.

So now, our business is booming. People ask us the secret of our success..how in 3 years we make good money and started a studio. The answer is LOVE...

So if the business fail, it meant that our love for each other has died. So until then, the business continues to grow and prosper as the love we have for each other grew stronger each day.

And then now, I wish you love...all of you. In your life with your better half. Its when you give and take, the things and people around you prosper. As God has intented it to be.

Peace be with you...

2 comments:

Blessed Homemaker said...

Gina, thanks for sharing your story. I think we all need to learn to live together, regardless of who, what, where and why. I must constantly remind myself how much I love DH and sometimes we just need to talk it out to resolve the matter. I'm still learning tobe a good wife.

Anonymous said...

I believe that some people enter my life because God put them there as an Angel to help guide and teach me.
You are my Angel, and I love you. Thank you Gina
Donna French Wylde