Wait for me...

Because He Lives (Christian Hymn)

How long do one grieve over the loss of some one dear to them? A week, a month or many years? I really don't know. My best friend, my mentor, my teacher has passed away recently. She is none other than Sister Seok Buay, the one and only person I started Kitchen Capers for. I think you must read for so long that I often talked about Seok Buay and about Kitchen Capers.

But let me write about this again. For one last time.

I created Kitchen Capers a few years after Boon's untimely death. Leaving Seok Buay and Kim San behind, weeping for him. Seok Buay seems to take forever to heal. She was often resentful of things around her and highly defensive when someone spoke of Boon.

One thing I never told anyone was why I started baking. I started to bake soon after Boon's passing. Because Seok Buay loves to bake. Buay took time away from her home, to stay away from Boon's room and his things. And she would take up a baking course in France at the famous Le Cordon Bleu. And she would come back after a few weeks and tell me of her adventures there. Seeing her so joyful, it makes me happy for her.

Then it became my personal goal in life to help her to cope with Boon's passing. I refitted my home with a baking cabinet. I would seek for Buay's advice on how to bake. In time, I pick up website design and met Prashant Patel with whom I learnt website design from. Then I started Kitchen Capers forum as a hobby site to share recipes on cooking and baking. Mainly because I was also learning..and I wanted Buay to find new hope, new purpose in life. As she was totally illiterate in computers, emails or the Internet.

I would go to her house, and suggested that she cook something she likes and to share the recipe online at the forum. In these early days in the year 2004, I started cooking, baking and documenting every recipe she had in her mind. And as she cooks, she talks and laughs at the same time. The food she serves are of course delicious..and knowing her, the love and joy in every dish she prepares can be savoured and enjoyed to the last bite.

With the popularity of social networking aka Facebook, a fellow church member wrote to me to say that Seok Buay has passed away on the 28th September 2011. I was totally in shock, because I knew she was fit as a fiddle. She was happy with life and with Kim San. Despite not having Boon around, she found joy and happiness in the things she does everyday. She found comfort reading the scriptures and peace from God whenever she prays.

And everytime when I know that she is going away to a country to serve the community, I would bake all the things she loved to eat. And that would be the signature Chocolate Walnut cookie I created for her. And she said once to me :

"Gina, wherever I am, I know you think of me. Eating this, knowing you, that's a blessing God gave to me and only to me alone"

I never share this recipe online or anywhere. It was a cookie I created just for Buay. A cookie to remind me of how much I loved her and respected her all the years she taught me to bake, to cook. She taught me to be bold, to be daring. To try out new things and not be afraid to accept failures. She would tell me about Boon and how she would teach him the same values too.

In so many ways, I know myself. I know I would not have dare to venture beyond. Not with Kitchen Capers. I mean, I started my career in computers. I taught computer programming, desktop publishing..not cooking or baking. Buay gave me so much hope which I thought I was giving to her instead.

I attended her wake on Friday, 30 September 2011..I walked and met Kim San, and I just couldn't control myself. I cried in his arms, holding Kim San tightly. And Kim San wept with me. For a moment, I could have swear the world stood still..with Kim San and I locked in each other's arms, in tears and crying out to each other.

The last time this happened, it was at Boon's funeral wake. And I was there, in the same position but it was with Buay in my arms, letting her cry her heart out to me. I had to take a day's leave from the office. I told my boss why..and he just sign my leave form and ask me to go.

Kim San told me that he blamed himself for Buay's sudden death. She was swimming in a private pool in a swimming club. Somehow, something happened..she drowned and no one came to her aid. Until minutes later, they tried to resuscitated her. By the time the ambulance came, she was pronounced dead.

Her body lied in the hospital for a day to find out the cause of death. And he said to me :

"Buay never goes swimming without me. We go together. Every day, we do things together. Going for breakfast, going for morning walks or even just to shop at the nearby market. We would be there for each other.." and then he went silent..and I could see tears forming in his eyes. I put my arms around him and try to comfort my friend.

And then he said :

"She would tell me how much she loved me. And she would openly hug me and kissed me in front of everyone." and then he smiled and continue to say

"But that is not allowed in our society. People think we are crazy"

and then I said :

"No, you are not crazy. To love and be loved is the greatest gift and to show it openly, that's pride. And that's what God intended us to do. To love and be loved...in each and every way we can."

When I left the wake, I thought to myself..okay, life goes on. Back to the office, there's work to be done. Get a hold of yourself..

But when the day ends, and all is quiet, I couldn't help but think of Buay again. When I went online at Facebook, there was a little app I had that says "What God wants you to know" and l click it to see what was the verse for the day. When I read it, I cried again.

And I shared my notes with what was given to me :

"On this day, God wants you to know
... that sometimes it may feel too hard to do it alone. Sometimes it may seem like you can't figure it out by yourself. Sometimes will and strength and courage are not enough. Sometimes in your life you will need to call out for help. Call on God. God will be there."

My response to that was :

Dear God, I have a friend who is going up there to meet you. Please see her at the gates and hold her hand and show her around your place. And when its time for me to see her, ask her to come and meet me at the gates. Tell her how much I am so gonna missed her here. And her name is Seok Buay.

So to all who know me..and knows me for Kitchen Capers..
Live and love life to the fullest each day. Tell the people you loved how much you loved him/her or them. Even if its a pet. Live like there is no tomorrow. For tomorrow may never come. At least you get to say your goodbyes, your expressions and your admiration for that person.

I know I have grieved for many, but Seok Buay will always be that special someone I hold dear to my heart, someone I loved till the end of time. And when I go up there, I know she will be at the gates. Waiting for me. Waiting to show me all the new things up there. Like she always have whenever she sees something new.

Till then, Sister Seok Buay, wait for me. Wait for me.


AMEN!

My Greatest Fear

That's What Friends Are For, sang/performed by Dionne Warwick, Stevie Wonder, Gladys Knight, Sir Elton John


While chatting with H on happy things, I ask her an interesting topic:

"H, what is your greatest FEAR?"

She said :

"flying cockroaches..!"

And I said to her :

"I fear the sea...the ocean."

H said "I loved the sea..but why you fear it?"

When I was very young, maybe 5 to 6 years. My uncle Bill used to take us out to Changi beach for picnic and swimming. I couldn't swim at all. So he got me a float so that I could go out to sea with my cousin John. But John could swim. And he swam really well. The sea that day was choppy, high winds and all. I was just next to John, then he said "let's swim over there to my dad.." then he turn around, kick his legs and accidentally kick off the float I was clinging on for dear life.

The float drifted away and I was struggling to keep afloat. Then I sunk..I opened my eyes and saw greenish water all around me. I saw bubbles above my eyes as I was trying to scream. And my screams were not heard underwater..I struggled and raised my hands and tried to make sure it was above water so someone would see me.

It must have been minutes but it seem like hours and no one came. My tears were mixed with the sea water around me, and I cried, but no one can hear me. I felt pain in my chest, and the bubbles started to diminish right before my eyes. I knew I was drowning...so in one last breath, I closed my eyes and told God I am coming. Please wait for me.





Then I felt someone grabbing my arms, and carrying me. I couldn't my eyes because the salt sea water have blurr my vision. For a moment I thought I have passed on and was in God's arms. Then I heard my uncle calling me, pressing my chest to revive me and to throw up the water.

When I finally opened my eyes, I could then see, it was my uncle who came to save me. And I knew God's plan for me was to stay here. My time isn't up yet. Since then, I learnt to swim. When I was in Secondary school, I entered the swimming team and won many prizes in swimming carnivals.

But the fear of drowning never leaves me. I took up Survival courses in swimming. I pass the Bronze level and went for the Silver. But when I was told that we needed to spend half a day out at sea to test our endurance in choppy waters, I chickened out. Then I realised that despite knowing how to float now and even how to swim, I could not bring myself to go out to sea again. I could never swim in the open ocean. The fear never leaves me. Even though our swimming coach was around and he had other assistants who are life guards to be on standby. I just couldn't bring myself to go out to sea again.

Some years later, when I working for Jardine Fleming, my boss send me on my first maiden trip to Jakarta. Just a 3 day work week to hold meetings and discussions with the Publications team at our Jakarta office. I was bound to take SilkAir flight out of Singapore to Jakarta. The plane was due to arrive JKT at 8am, then I had planned to be jostled downtown from airport to the hotel and check in and leave for the office for meeting by noon.

When I boarded the plane, everything seemed fine. All systems go, so to speak. Then the plane couldn't lift off..some technical problems. All of us could hear the engine moving but also it make funny noises too. We were stuck in the plane, on ground for over an hour. Then the Captain allowed us to make calls to our families, friends or biz here in Singapore to say that we will be late to arrive in Jakarta. And ask them*our Singaporean family to relay the message to our counterparts in Indonesia.

The captain assured us that we will not be leaving the plane to board another saving us the hassles of moving and transferring. But the ground crew need to check a couple of 'things' before lift off.

Finally at almost 11am, the plane took off and we landed in Jakarta by noon. By that time all my plans delayed. The going home part was smooth however.

When I went back to the office, my boss Su Chzeng said to me :

"Gina, you are on SIA planes, aren't they the safest, fastest around?"

2 months later...this same SilkAir plane plunged into the Palembang River, Indonesia, killing everyone on board. Su Chzeng was in shock..she told me "I take my words..!"

A brush with death..but God kept me safe..

Some years later, our family went for a short 4 day trip to Phuket. Benny couldn't join us as he couldn't take leave. So I went with my girls, my parents, my sis, her hubby and my niece. We did all the sea sports. I had to face up to my own fears. In one occasion, we went scuba diving. The guide was good and gather us around. We swam in small groups. Melody was barely 4 back then. A dip in the sea is just too much for her. The wind was extremely strong that day. The sea current wasn't too forgiving. She wanted out..and sat on the boat and watch us.

The guide told us to gather together as the currents are getting too strong. I heard him, and as I was about to swim my way to him, the current proved too strong for me..I drifted away...with the scuba gear on my back, and my fear got the best of me..I struggled vigorously and shouted for help. But the wind carried my voices out to sea..and I was starting to drift further away from the group. Although I was still afloat, I could only think I was dying again.

Thank God, my brother in law, Francis was nearby. And he waved to the boat driver. And he drove the boat around to pick me up.

Another brush with death and its with the sea again. That incident left me somewhat shaken. I shuddered to think what the future is for me with the sea. But still I was thankful that God saved me again.

A month later, Tsunami hits Phuket, wiping out the village and the tourist spots. And Tsunami hits that very same spot I was in back then.

When I told H, I realised for so many times I have that close brush with death. Almost dying but life given back to me. My greatest fear to date is still swimming in the open ocean. But never about anything else. I live my life loving everyone, everything. All the time.

Why?

Because I REALLY do not know what the future holds for me. What will happened next. How many times have you had that close brush with death. ?

Like in the movies "Final Destination"...I cheated death so many times over. How much longer can I do this.?

So live your life to the fullest. Like there is no tomorrow. Mend old hurts today, not tomorrow. Rekindled old friendships now. Say you love your mom or dad or mother in law or child today, every day. Show you care. Because your next breath of life may be your last.

I Wish you Love...

A post dedicated to my Forever Boss, Miss Ong Su-Chzeng. A lady who till today, earns my deepest respect for being boss and friend and confidante.

There is so many things I could write about her and how she inspires me but I am just sharing some thoughts here. And photos of my time as her staff.

My friendship started with Su in the year 1995. She was the Regional Director for Publications in JF Tokyo. And was to leave Tokyo to start a new division in Singapore's office. She interviewed me over the phone. Read about her again here.

Su has high expectations of me and my work with Publications. But she was also like any loving mother who nurtures her child to the fullest potential. Working for her meant long hours in the office. She would expect me to start my day at 8:30am and go home by 8pm. In the beginning, it was difficult to juggle my time as a career woman and to be a wife to Benny and a mother to Natasha. We had no maid working for us back then.

Su taught me many life skills which at the time I was working for her, I found to be too intimidating but now, I realised she was moulding me to what I am today.

She would send me off to our Asian offices in Hong Kong, Kuala Lumpur, Taiwan, and also Indonesia. I travelled frequently to these countries to access the work flow. And all these time, I travelled alone. I had to learn the local language(some how), figure my way around the local transport system in that country and find my way to and fro the office and to the hotel I was staying. Su allows a day or 2 extended in my business trip each time. So I could go shopping, unwind and enjoy the company with the office staff outside working hours.

She used to tell me :

"Gina, work is important. During office hours, we WORK WORK WORK! But after office hours, cast off your work shoes and hats and let your hair down. Go and drink, have fun and enjoy the company of new friends!"

She taught me how to drink for business and for pleasure. But I usually don't drink at any business meeting. She taught me what to say and how to say in meetings with 'serious' officials.

I remembered my first maiden trip to Hong Kong. I was literally scared of my wits because I have NEVER travelled alone. Somehow, Su senses that. She booked a flight on the same plane with me. Told me the day before we leave :

"Gina, I am on the same plane with you to Hong Kong. But I will be in the Business Class, you are at the Economy Class. When we land, you go your way, I go mine. I will be staying at Furama Hotel and you will be staying at the Esceislor Hotel"

In a subtle way, she is watching me from afar. Some people find this an intrusion of privacy, others would have felt that the boss is not trusting her staff to do the job. But to me, I find this most encouraging. Here is Su, standing at a distance..watching and waiting. If I needed help, she's nearby, like a stone's throw away. In a reassuring way, her presence made me feel so much at ease.

At work in the Hong Kong's Jardine House, it was all work and no play. All too business like. But after that, she would chase me out of the office and say :

"Gina, go and figure out the MTR and find your way back to the hotel. I will meet you at 7pm at my hotel's lobby and we will go for dinner together"

I remembered in the next trip I made to Hong Kong a few months later, Su would make me change hotels in a matter of 2 days. Why? So I learn what to say to the hotel staff who are trying so hard to please me to make me stay back. Telling white lies here and there. Sometimes we need to lie a bit here and there. But lies that are said shouldn't get people into big trouble or problems.

I never could understand the rationale of changing hotels. Why make yourself comfortable in one and next day, you have to pack up and leave for another hotel further down the one you are staying? Only to find out years later when we were on a holiday in Genting Highlands, we had to change hotels due to run-down, poorly run or disorganised tour agency who took us for a ride!

My time in Jardine Fleming was 42 months or slightly over 3 years. When I tendered my resignation, Su had mixed feelings. Because one part of her wants to wish me success, another part of her wanted me to stay on. The year I left JF was also the years for many "Bear Runs" in the Stock and shares industry. She was tasked by our HQ to pick people to retrench and she had a talk with me and ask me to help her to choose who should go.

We sat down, and run through the short-listed personnel. And couldn't decide who should go. Because everyone was important to the department.

In the end, I offered to leave. And I gave her the excuse that Benny was earning well and he could support me. Though I was about to give birth to Melody, I needed to have an extra income too. I told her I could easily find jobs anywhere, its only whether I would want to work or not. An act of courage, Su thought I was being too modest and she started calling all the software companies to take me as their staff.

It is through this, she found a job for me. After my maternity leave, I would work at Quark Media House..the company that distributes Quark Xpress software in the region. I met my Irish Boss who heard so much about me from Su. And all he was interested in was how Melody look like, asking me for photographs of little Melody.

Like a chip off the old block, I would think that my Irish boss was like Su when she first interview me. She only ask about Natasha and photos of her. And everything outside work, just only interested to find out more about me!

I knew for sure, this is the place I should work after Su, after JF.

The day I left JF was a sad day in JF. Su and I couldn't bring ourselves to say Good Bye to each other. We were moping around in the office. The office staff thought she was cold towards me , after all, she often praise me in front of everyone.

The next day, Su went into the office, at 8:45am. The time she would often be in the office. Jennifer, our department's secretary would put her cup of coffee there..warmed for her. But somehow, Su felt it was cold, not the coffee. But her desk was empty. And she would often looked up and across the room and she would see me sitting at my desk. But I wasn't there. Not anymore.

It suddenly dawned on her that I was gone from the office. Su rang me later that day just to tell me this:


"Gina, my desk is empty. You always knew when I was sad and you always surprise me with little things. Now you are no longer here with me. How am I to go thru every day..."

It was the start of my long emails to her. Every other day, I would send her an email about life, about things and we kept in contact all these years. My friends wondered why I kept in contact with my ex bosses..all of which ended up as good friends. I believe that when you work someone, you don't just work for money or to gain experience. But along the way, you should find a friend in the many many streams in your life.

In one of the many inspirational notes I used to write to Su, this was one of her all time favourites.

God's Boxes
(writer, unknown)

I have in my hands two boxes
Which God gave me to hold
He said, “Put all your sorrows in the black,
And all your joys in the gold.”
I heeded his words, and in the two boxes
Both my joys and sorrows I store
But though the gold became heavier each day
The black was as light as before
With curiosity, I opened the black
I wanted to find out why
And I saw, in the base of the box, a hole
Which my sorrows had fallen out by
I showed the hole to God, and mused aloud,
“I wonder where my sorrows could be.”
He smiled a gentle smile at me.
"My child, they're all here with me."
I asked,"God, why give me the boxes,
"Why the gold, and the black with the hole?"
"My child, the gold is for you to count your blessings,
the black is for you to let go."

I later crafted the two boxes. And painted one black and the other gold. One Christmas, I gave these 2 boxes to Su and printed the above poem in a nice fancy paper for her.

I continue my notes to her via email for many years that followed. Then when I started blogging, I started writing these again. And I would send her an email to read my blog if I wrote about her. There is so much I have to say but for now, this is it. I would write again, maybe in a few day's time.

In memory of...

A famous love quote that goes like this:

Better to have loved and lost than never to have love at all.



It took me a while to get what it meant because when I was younger, I have always been loved and still loved until one day that person I loved left me suddenly. Too late for goodbyes, no chance to say how much I adored her and loved her. This person is my late granny, my mother's mom.

I am not allowed to talk about her death in public like a blog. All I can say is that she died suddenly, and horribly. Why did I write this post today? Because next week its Mid Autumn Festival.. we celebrate this every year with her. Because its her birthday too. After her death in 1984, we stopped celebrating Mid Autumn Festival. We stop eating moon cakes altogether, always in memory of Ah Ma.

When she died, my world of perfection fell too. My Ah Ma was EVERYTHING TO ME. Although she couldn't speak English nor Mandarin. She spoke to me in Hokkien. And I learn to speak Hokkien from her. She told me all the time :

"Ting Ting, I will always love you. You are a very good girl. Very filial. And continue to be like that."

It took me years to get over her death. In the early years it was really difficult. It was even more difficult when I had Sidney who didn't understand what I was going through. All of us(my mom, relatives and all who are related to her by blood) grieved differently.

I know I have prayed at least a 1000 times asking God to heal me and to let me go on in life. Many friends rallied around us, giving us all kinds of support. But no one could understand our grief, our pain. A year later, my grandfather left us to meet his wife in Heaven. :(

My mom cried every day, and every wakeful moment she had. It was painful to watch this every day. I had to work and I come home to cold food or sometimes no food. My mom had no energy left to do anything.

Till today, sometimes certain events or things remind her of her parent's passing, she would bring it up again and talk and cry.

Some 25 years or so have passed...and we are still grieving..why? That's a clear sign how much you can love someone and still cannot let go.

When I sometimes "blog-hop" I get to read about a death of a loved one, I was compelled to write a long email or a comment to comfort that blogger. But I guess its best I write this in my own blog for ALL to read and understand what a person goes through when someone they loved just left them.

I still don't know what to say to someone who lost a loved one. But this much I can say :

Take time to cry. And Cry as much as you want to. Don't be worried how everyone sees you. Because no one can understand how much this person means to you.

And if it takes forever, then forever it will be. Because you do not stopped loving that someone. In fact, you loved them more. Because the days will pass by, empty. And its only natural for you to think of that someone. The things you use to do, or the things you plan to do.

Of all the goodbyes, good mornings, good nights you missed telling that someone and all the "how much I love you" that was missed, some are said and heard. And felt when that someone was still around.

Let no one decides how you should heal. We all heal differently. Some of us are better at it. While others are still coping.

As a friend, its often said "A friend in need is a friend indeed". To be a friend for your friend who has lost someone closed to them, is to lend your shoulders for tears, a hug with no words spoken, a tear shared together.

To me, that is what I called a Friend Indeed!

But at the end of this, I learn to thank God for putting me thru it all. I was able to understand and feel for others who went thru Hell on Earth when someone they loved left them.

It is through my pain of loosing Ah Ma taught me to be there for Sister Seok Buay when her beloved son, Boon left her. And my way of helping her to cope was to start Kitchen Capers. So she can use it to learn about email, Internet and write recipes to help her to cope. There is something to look forward to.

But alas, Sister Buay is still grieving..she is still coping. Boon has left her some 9 years ago.

Seen here : Bespectacled boy is the late Master Tan Boon Teik, next to him is Sister Seok Buay, his mom.


Boon was Sister Seok Buay and Brother Kim San's only child. I remember spending much time grieving with Sis Buay. I just stood there and cry with her. It was the best thing I could do at that time. And all she did was to repeat herself over and over again, telling me how she watch him breathe his last and passed on.

Years before I was working at Jardine Fleming, I met my boss Su Chzeng who also lost her better half some years back. When she came to work in Singapore, I could see her grief, through her 'heart'. And in small subtle ways, I would drop notes on her desk and send her inspirational poems or stories to help her to cope.

Her husband, the late Alan Booth, passed away in January 1993...2 years later, she came to Singapore to set up 'shop' with me at Jardine Fleming. I was the only person she employed to work with her at that time. By the time I left Jardine in 1998, our department grew to 10 persons.

Su Chzeng is still finding time to let go. And many people who never had loved ones leaving them could never understand why you need so long a time to get over it. Sometimes just out of the blue, Su would ring me and talk about past. And she knew that as always she could tell me anything and started tearing if she had to. And I wouldn't probe or poke fun at her. In fact, I may end up crying alongside with her.

I told Su that I haven't stopped crying for Ah Ma sometimes. Things I see, or do reminds me so much of lost time I could have done with my Ah Ma too.

I kept Ah Ma's memory alive by telling my younger cousins about her. What she was like and what she would want us to be. Its been 2 decades now..and I still cry for her once in a while.

To all my friends who reads my blog, I hope this post helps you to come into terms about grieving. If you have lost someone closed to you, you are not termed a weakling just because its been years and you are still crying.

In memory of..all who have lost but have loved..That's not lost. That's LOVE eternally.

Spicy, Sour and a hint of Sweetness

We had mee siam again last week. Benny wanted it for weekend meals which he can have as midnight supper as and when he likes it. Here's the recipe my mom learnt from CC(Community Club run by People's Assn) donkey years ago.

We grew up eating this version and now we don't like those serve in most food courts. Its unique because this version has coconut milk in the stock.


These are packed for my parents, sister, brother in law and my niece. Yums!



This dish to fight for:



Serves 10 persons
Ingredients:
400g mee siam paste
50g chives, chopped
100g soya beans
10 hard boiled eggs
20 pcs of small tau pok/dried bean curd, diced
250ml tamarind juice (2 tbsp tamarind pulp mixed with 100ml water)
7 tbsp sugar (more or less according to your taste)
300g bean sprouts
10 small limes
600ml coconut milk(or Evaporated Milk)
900ml water
2 kg fresh grey prawns
2 packets of rice vermicelli(bee hoon), soaked to soften

Mee Siam paste:
10 cloves garlic
22 shallots
120g dried chillies (soaked to soften)
50g belacan/dried prawn paste (toasted and pounded)
120g dried shrimps (soak in water, soften)

400ml corn oil

Method for Paste

1. Put all the ingredients except the oil into a blender and blend into a fine paste.
2. Heat up the wok and add oil. Add the blended paste to fry over low heat till it is fragrant. Leave it aside till its cooled.
3. The paste should look very oily.
4. Note that though there is a lot of oil remaining, do not throw away this oil. As it is fragrant and to be used for frying the mee siam noodles.

Method for the rest
1. In the wok, add 200g of oily mee siam paste to heat. Add softened rice vermicelli(bee hoon) and stir fry till its dry and cooked.



2. Add bean sprouts to fry. Remove and set aside.



3. In a large pot, add water to boil. Add prawns to cook over high heat for 2 mins. Drain and remove all shells/heads of prawns, wash and devein. Set aside.

4. When the prawn stock comes to a boil again, add rest of mee siam paste to boil.
5. Once it starts boiling, add coconut milk, tamarind juice, soya beans and sugar. Turn heat to low and simmer for 25 minutes.
5. To serve, add hot gravy on fried rice vermicelli and garnish with egg, fried bean curd, prawns, chives and freshly squeezed lime juice.

Here Kitty , Kitty(Hello Kitty Fans)

I am doing this for a friend who has collected a bedroom full of Hello Kitty stuff. I don't even know what is the term or word to use for this.

I have reserved a shelf space at my KC store at Kallang Bahru to display her 'toys' for sale. These are stuff she collected since young with that dream that one day when she marries someone, has a home of her own, she would use it. But when the day finally came, she couldn't find the heart to open it and use it. For years she kept it as collector's items. Over time, she collected so much that now all of it sits stacked up in boxes in one bedroom.

With much 'pain' she says, she has to part with it to make space for baby or family planning.

Since I am doing her a favour, I cannot give her a full rack space for this, except a shelf space. These are sold while stocks lasts. Each week, she will bring down different things she feels she can let it go from her private collection. All the items are authentic Hello Kitty stuff.

Sorry, I cannot quote prices here as I don't intend to keep an inventory for this. Whatever sales i collected from this will be returned to her.

The sale starts today ..here is a group shot of what she brought down. I have ask her to only bring things related to kitchen or bake ware. No toys, no handbags, no watches.

Despite this, she still didn't have the heart to sell some of the items..she took home 3 waste paper baskets yesterday. And gave me the excuse that "oh, these I can use for my baby's room!"

Chilli in my Rojak...Part 8

I'm in the Lord's Army, a kids action song. A song we sang and acted out during Sunday School to get the little super active kids to have fun in God's presence.

I started teaching in Sunday School in my church (Church of Singapore at Marine Parade) in the early 1980s. After being inspired by my beloved cousin, the late Michael Lam. At that time, I didn't know where to start, that is, which age group should I start to be. My sister in Christ, Miss Cindy Goh, affectionately known by all of us as Aunty Cindy suggested that I should start from the nursery kids. Their ages are from 3 to 5 years old. Young, innocent and awfully sweet, they have the innocence of all children.

She would hand me a child who was new in Sunday School and my 'on-the-job' training starts soon enough. Often, this kid will be crying non stop, looking for his/her mommy and nothing can be said or done to console or comfort the kid that mommy is coming back soon. I was to learn and figure it out by myself how to handle this kid.

And my fondest memory was of one boy named Victor. He came with his sister, Vicky. He was a year younger, his sister was handled by Cindy. But Vicky was a regular back then so she could mingled with the rest better. Victor, being new to Sunday School, was fearful, tearful and cried unconsolably.

Every Sunday, Victor would come and I would be his "Aunty" for the 2 hours and he would do nothing but screamed and cried in my ears. I was almost deaf by end of the day. There were moments I wondered if this is what I should be doing..I could have spent my time sleeping at home and waking just in time to catch the adult worship service at 10am rather than to spend my 8am to 10am being screamed at.

Then one Sunday came and I had to work, so I rang up Cindy to say I couldn't come. I couldn't even attend the service too. The following Sunday, it was routine again in Sunday School. I didn't go to Sunday School with a big heart. And there was Victor again. Big deal, he would be crying again.

Yes, he did. As usual. But this time it was different. He was crying for me! His hands were out-stretched and he run to me instead of his mommy. And he cried and cried and hugged me tightly. Victor was a little boy with little words. He hasn't figured out long sentences or big words. And after all, I never did hear him speak..all I hear each week was "wah...mah..."

For once, after 3 months or 12 weeks of hearing him going "Wah....Mah....", he finally said to me :

"Aunty Gina, I love you. Where you go? You don't want Victor?"

Just one Sunday...I didn't come. And he noticed that I was not around. Of course he was still crying last Sunday but he was crying because he didn't see me.

It was then Aunty Cindy told me..

"Gina, this is the Joy and the rewards we get for loving our little ones. They return it back to us. So simple. As innocent as it is.This is what makes it worth every moment to come and teach in Sunday School every week"

And that started my side 'career' in the Children's Ministry. And I took up courses run by The Singapore Bible College to minister to little ones. How to speak to them at their level and how to bring the Gospel to them. It was the most enduring time in my life as a Christian. So many times the kids taught me simple Biblical values in life we often overlooked and forget.

Along the way, Cindy became my mentor and she guided me in this path I took. I started with the nursery kids in 1980 to 1982. Then in 1982 till 1985, I went on to teach the juniors who are kids who just started out in Primary school.

But God had great plans for me..I was to teach a group of kids that couldn't fit anywhere in the age groups we had. These kids are either with special needs or came from single parent homes. My years in teaching them gave me a new perspective in life. And taught me that Love is Kind...Always..!

I will share more about my Special Kids in separate posts in my blog.

But this Chilli in my Rojak is Aunty Cindy Goh..the person who mentored me and guided me in my path to minister to children. To bring them to Christ. In their tender age..to love and to care for everyone, and everything.

For years we became the best of friends and would confide to each other on everything. When I got married to Benny, Cindy decorated the church hall with flowers for me. When our girls were born, I return to Children's Ministry and minister to the babies.

When my girls were growing up in Church, Aunty Cindy ministered to them and taught them Biblical Values the way we use to teach other kids.

Almost a decade ago, Cindy quit her full time job to work in our church and to run the CM department. She did a wonderful job because she loves children. Each and everyone of them. Every year, she would lead a team to go to Cambodia and to Thailand, to visit orphanages run by our church.

Here is a photo of her with kids from an orphanage in Cambodia.


Aunty Cindy is the lady on the left of this photo.

A Tribute to Aunty Cindy Goh...a selfless person who gives so much more and expected nothing back. God Bless you, Aunty Cindy, my friend, mentor and confidante!

Mocha Madness

Benny doesn't like cakes. Who cares whose is the best. But recently I started selling a particular brand of concentrated paste from Germany, there was a flavour I wanted to try. That's Mocha, under the Pastarom brand.

It started to be something I wanted to do for my mother in law's birthday which we celebrated with her over dinner last week. But Benny said, his siblings already brought a cake there..so he said "leave this at home".

So I did..and have to slice it and give a quarter to my mom, to my maid to enjoy and the rest, we ate just for fun.

Then out of the blue, Benny said "This cake is nice..very fragrant and not too sweet. I like it. Can you bake another one for me to bring to the office?"

And so, I did. The first cake is the first version I did with just fresh cake. The red sides are just food colouring.

The 2nd cake I did was for his office. And that was made only last night after we closed shop. The things I do for his office!!

The 2nd cake's topping was Mocha Mousse..not fresh cream. It tasted like coffee ice cream on top. Now I am regretting that I didn't make this mousse topping in my first cake.


This is the paste I used. Pastarom Mocha Paste(imported from Germany)


Selling at KC store at S$5.50 per jar of 100g

Here's the recipe for all..
Mocha Sponge Cake
Recipe by Gina Choong

Ingredients A
150g Top flour (or Cake flour)
2.5 tbsp Mocha Paste(Pastarom brand)
100ml Dairy whipping cream
5 egg yolks

Ingredients B
7 egg whites
120g fine sugar

Method
1. Beat egg yolks with whipping cream till creamy and fluffy. Add mocha paste and stir till well blended.
2. Fold in flour with egg yolk batter and set aside.
3. Whip egg whites till foamy then add sugar until it peaks.
4. Mix the 2 batters together until its well combined.
5. Pour into cake pan.
6. Bake at preheated oven 170 deg C for 25 mins. Remove to cool before removing from pan.

Ingredients for Cream
150ml non dairy whipping cream
2 tbsp icing sugar
2 tbsp mocha paste(Pastarom)

Method:
1. Add all together in a mixer bowl and whip till it peaks.
2. Store in the chiller till ready to use.
3. Decorate on the cake only when the cake is completely cooled.

Mocha Mousse
Recipe By Gina Choong

Enough to cover a 9 inch cake with 2 inch height
Ingredients
250ml Thickened Cream(at least 35% Fat)
3 tbsp Mocha paste(Pastarom)
4 tbsp icing sugar

Method
1. Add all the ingredients into a mixer bowl and use a balloon whisk to whip till it peaks.
2. Store it in the chiller for at least 2 hours before using.
3. When the cake is baked and completely cooled, pipe or simply covered it with the Mocha Mousse topping.
4. Sprinkle with Valrhona Cocoa powder on top or mini silver dragees.
5. Chill the cake before serving.

Notes
The leftover Mousse can be piped straight onto hot Coffee without sugar or cream. The mousse will melt when its in contact with hot coffee and will sweeten the coffee.

Keep well, chilled for upto 3 days.

Chilli in my Rojak...Part 4

We don't get to choose the people we meet each day. Nor the friends we keep for now or forever. Nor the ones we just want to let go. In all my years of working in the corporate world, I am truly thankful that my bosses eventually became great friends with me. Even after leaving my job, we kept in contact and I tried to see them time to time.

My most glorious time working was between 1995 to 1998. Where I worked as a DTP Specialist with Jardine Fleming International Securities. My job expectations were very high. From my boss, Su-Chzeng. She was with JF for 10 years and lived in Japan all that time. Our HQ wanted her to start a Asia HQ and she picked Singapore to be the place. She interviewed me over the phone. We spoke for the first time and she ask me questions related not to work but about life at home, my family and what are my hobbies.

It was more like getting to know each other. Su's way was always different. She is not like the usual bosses we all know. When we met the first time in Singapore, it was another interview. This time it was face to face. Again, we talked about life in general. Not about work. Clearly enough, she read my CV and found me not suitable for the job I was applying for.

Then how in the world I got the job? I got the job because Su thinks I can 'grow' into it. That my other skills that are non-bank like would help them in the work I was to do.

When I first started, Su was back in Japan. I was stucked in Singapore to run or pioneered the department from ground up. I had no one to help me. And remember,...I don't have the right skills either! It was then I learnt to be very thick-skinned, made friends in every department in the office and learn everything from everyone.

It is through this experience, Su taught me to be self-reliant. The very skills I needed now, today when I had my shop. Back then, I never knew why she did that to me. Leaving me alone to struggle on my own without knowing what to do. She felt that the best way to teach me was to leave me treading in the deep sea without any life saver(float) or a helpline.

It was the most important lesson I have learnt. And when Su finally made the trip to Singapore and settled here, the department was just the two of us. And that was in mid 1995. By the time I left JF in November 1998, the department grew to be at least 10-member strong. And it became the HQ for 13 countries.

One other thing she taught me was to travel alone. She would expect me to book my own flights out of Singapore to go to Hong Kong or Taiwan or Jakarta, etc. I would have to learn how to find my way around, spoke like the locals and find my own food.

To be frank, I never travel anywhere outside Singapore alone. Not until I met Su and work with her.

When I left JF, I was still very much in touch with Su. One of the things she taught me was to re-discover myself. To find my other strengths and talents that had lay hidden for a very long time due to the monotonous work I had to do everyday as an IT professional.

This was a poem I wrote for her when I was working (not with her). In the email I wrote to her...

***
Dear Su,

Recently a survey was conducted in-house by an account servicing staff to ask what was the first thing people thought of when the word "Splendor" was mentioned.

This is what I wrote..but not for them..its for you:

Splendor
re-written by Gina Choong

Hmm...splendor
What would that mean?
Would it mean "though the radiance which was once so bright be now forever taken from my sight?"

The only radiance I once knew
was knowing and working with you
for someone I hardly knew
could bring some radiance to the world I loft of

"Though nothing can bring back the hour"
and nothing can stop me thinking
of how once I hated tables and charts
and how now I missed Zielinski's 'ole figures and rants

"We will grieve not, rahter find
Strength in what remains behind;"
that our friendship stands to this date
dear and faithful through all the days

"in the faith that looks through death, in years that bring the philosophic mind"
For all I can say, Dear Su, its all your fault
I never knew I could be so poetic
neither did I know I could write
and its become a disease of some kind
and lest I do it, I am slave to this new find

and till the day, I find my cure
I know that forever you will have to endure
my one and many endless poetic or none to eccentric rants
of past and new I have to grant

Love, Me, your forever staff.

Note : Text in quotes are taken originally from William Wordsworth's "Splendor in the Grass"

Su is one chilli in my rojak. Someone I still keep very much in contact with. Someone dear to me.

ps..Su Chzeng is now a full fledged Life Skills Coach. I think she is the best person to do this. What would I be now, without her coaching all these years.

End of Part 4.

Chilli in my Rojak...Part 3

Alone again, Naturally Sung by Gilbert Sullivan

I met someone who was recently divorced. She was someone who used to buy bakeware from me before I started the shop.

When I started KC store, she still prefers to visit me at home but my home is now at the store. She told me about the divorce and the bitterness it left her high and dry. She was frustrated and bitter with her ex. Time and again, he cheated on her. And enough was enough, she told me. She filed for divorce and took their only child with her.

She offered to work for me at the store. But I declined. My reasons for her was I already had one staff with me. That's Willie, my brother-in-law. Though he may not be very knowledgeable with baking and stuff, he is someone I can trust to leave the store to when I am away.

The other reason I didn't tell her was her bitterness. Until she let it go, I find it hard to have her work for me.

She was utterly bitter with herself, her life and its also the past she cannot let go. Its only when you loved so much and get hurt all the time, it will take forever to heal. She loved her ex-husband alot more than she could comprehend. Which she kept saying "I don't love him. He's a bastard!". Feeling betrayed and cheated so many times, she just couldn't let it go.

On the phone, we talked and I became her punching bag. She would 'scold' me and 'yell' at me. Venting her frustrations in every word, every sentence she said.

I remembered being like that when I left Sidney. I was bitter and unhappy all the time. My best friend, Suzie became my punching bag too. But no matter what, I only let out things about me, about him or about us. I never said things that would hurt Suzie.

However, this lady was different. She said alot of things to me. Just because I told her I am alone in my shop. Usually Benny comes after work to help me to close shop and drives me home. Sometimes he brings me out to have supper after the shop closes. But some days he had to attend dinners by friends or company, then he cannot come and help me.

She said :

"Gina, don't trust him on this. He is cheating on you. He is spending time with other women. And make sure you check his clothes. There will be smells of sweet perfume or lipstick stains somewhere! All MEN are idiots. "


That was a terrible thing to say to someone..anyone whom you do not know very well. Just because yours didn't work out, it doesn't mean that mine is the same like yours too!

And she went on to say how Benny would cheat on me. All the usual lies MEN are very good in telling. After they have slept with other women, they come home and behaved like angels. Bring their wives out for dinner or are extra loving.

She keep saying "He is cheating on you. You are so stupid not to feel it or see it."

I really felt like hitting her..I think this clipart of this Angry, Frowning Caveman says it all!


To be frank, it never did crossed my mind. Never ever ONCE. I never thought that Benny would cheat on me. And I think Benny would never thought the same about me when I used to work late every other night at the office.

To many who are hurt, broken and unhappy with their marriages, their spouses, they all tell the same story. That they thought they could trust each other, but each time, they are betrayed. I guess when your world crumbles, everything you say is very negative.

I can live with that. And understand that. I still like to think that Sidney was a good man. But not good enough for me. He is happily married a year before Benny and I finally marry. He left Singapore with his wife, Alexandra. And yes, I do know about that too! And spoken to the happy bride. I never get to meet Alexandra because they are leaving the country to return to Britain to visit her side of the family.

But its important that while we are hurting, we shouldn't hurt the ones who gave us support and care.

And to think that I have lived a part of my life meeting all kinds of people, I met someone who was so bitter that she breathes bitterness to others too.

Its often too easy to absorb that and to think the same for ourselves too. And no matter what I say or try to say to her, she just couldn't accept. Until she let it go, she will continue to be bitter and sore. There is more to life than this, we all know. This is one time that one should pick up a new skill, try a different kind of food or make new friends and move on.

Dwelling on the past makes you more bitter. Life goes on. To my friend, PM, I hope you healed soon. Its when you let it go, then you can heal completely and move on with life. He may not be the one for you, and its not the end of the world yet. Unfortunately, life isn't fair. It never is. But we can make the best of it and the best comes from within.

God Bless you...

End of Part 3..

O is for Oyster Omelette

A fellow blogger ask me for this recipe. Something I learnt from Pauline D Loh. Here's the recipe.


Ingredients
200g oysters(I used frozen pack)
3 eggs(beaten)
50g Sweet Potato Starch
100ml water
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp ground white pepper
fresh coriander leaves as garnish

Method
1. mix the starch with water, stir till well mixed.
2. Add salt to beaten eggs
3. Heat up the frying pan with cooking oil
4. Scoop a ladle full of starch mixture and pour onto the hot pan.
5. When it starts to crisp on the sides of the pan, pour egg mix on top.
6. Let it cook for a while about 1 min or so.
7. Add some oysters on top.
8. Next, pour the remaining starch mixture on top and rest of oysters.
9. Slowly flipped it over to crisp the other side.
10. Serve hot, garnish with pepper and coriander leaves

Bearing gifts in Gold

For last 2 years, a friend has ask if I could make some nice fancy nian gao(Chinese New year cakes) for her to bring as gifts when she returns to China to visit her in laws and extended family. Without fail, I obliged. This year, with a store, she understands how busy I will be and said I don't have to do it for her. But I wanted to. Because she was also my mentor..someone who taught me Food styling, food photography and all things culinary wise. She is none other than Dr Pauline D Loh. Once upon a time, she was my boss when I used to work at Miles Media(the company that publishes Kitchen Culture's Food and Travel Magazine). Then we started Cuisine Asia together with my friend , Jean Lee.

Despite leaving Cuisine Asia, I was still in touch with Pauline on and off as she travels extensively in Asia for her work with ChannelNewsAsia. She has since left CNA. Jean is in China too. With her hubby, and World Vision China.

Last night after closing shop at 9pm, I rush home to make nian gao for her. And woke up early again this morning and painted all the nian gao.

This is a Gold Bar with chinese words and a double set of Mandarin Oranges.



This is a pool of 8 baby koi fishes swimming around the chinese character "Fu" which means Wealth. Each fish is specked with Edible Gold leaf to bring wealth to the recipient




These are also 8 Baby koi fishes speck with Gold leaf and the chinese words meant "May Wealth flow in abundance for you"


And lastly, all homes and businesses should have these!

A Gold Ingot with fishes swimming upwards to it and coming back with gold speck on their foreheads!


To Pauline and Li De

Wishing you and all at home a year of blessings from above

Love,
Gina

Cooling comfort

This is a dessert I created for family some years back. Especially great after a hearty meal of feasting of Reunion Dinner on the eve of chinese new year or after a few boxes of Chinese new year cookies of all sorts.

It soothes the throat, and is mildly sweet. Since then, I have taught this delightful dessert at Country clubs, various cooking schools and also with tourists who visited Singapore during the annual Singapore Food Festival.

Chrysanthemum Jelly
Recipe by Gina Choong



Ingredients
100g chrysanthemum flowers
1 litre of water
1.5 tbsp konnyaku jelly powder
150g fine sugar
100g honey(clear)

Method
1. Heat up pot with water and sugar till sugar melts.
2. Add flowers to brew for 5 mins. Turn off the fire and leave it to stand for another 5 mins.
3. Carefully drained the flowers and soak in iced water.
4. Reserve 500ml of chrysanthemum drink and pour into another sauce pot.
5. Sprinkle jelly powder on top, turn on fire and use a whisk to whisk it it dissolves
6. Stir till the liquid slowly thickens.
7. Place one flower in the jelly mould and slowly pour the jelly liquid into it.
8. Leave it in the fridge to set for at least 2 hours.
9. Chill the remaining chrysanthemum drink till very cold, add honey to stir till dissolve
10. To serve, unmould jelly into a bowl filled with honeyed chrysanthemum water.
11. Serve cold after a nice meal.

Notes
The flower in the jelly is just for decoration. It shouldn’t be eaten as it is bitter.
Never boil chrysanthemum flowers over high heat for longer than 10 mins. It will turn the drink into a dark pale colour and makes it very bitter despite having sugar in it.

This special dessert is ideal to serve after a heavy meal like Chinese New Year dinners.

A new year of blessings

This post today is a post to bless you, and you and you and many more out there. While many would have drawn up a list of new year resolutions of what they plan to do and to achieve by year's end. I tried not to be too optimistic about achieving too much. But rather, to look back and reflect. On the numerous blessings God has given us without us realising it. The things we see that is happening everyday.

Now, take time to reflect. To sing praise to God. For all the moments in your life and your loved ones too. Even those unseen ones. The ones we forget or overlooked. Thank Him for good times and for bad. With good times, we sing praise. But with bad times, why do we need to be thankful of? It is through bad times, we learn to persevere, we learn how to cope. We learn to love more. And we learn how to take stock of what is left, sweep up the mess and move on and to inspire others.

While its easy to say "Dear God, I want to do this, or that. I hope I can do this and do that"

Why not say "Dear God, thank you for blessing me, in good times and in bad. In all my days and my moments when there are bad things happening. Thank you, Lord, for teaching me how to cope, showing me that I have many family and friends who cared for me as much as you do. If only I learn to be humble and be still and learn to see all the wonders of the world. "

I give you my thoughts for this new year..that you learn to see that love is definitely all around. Its just a little misty and blurry. We need to clean our minds and our hearts and be more open to the world. Then we can see it happening all the time.

God Bless you..

This is a hymn song in Chinese. I think its beautifully sung.

Muffins coming out of my ears!

That's the remark from one of the students when they came for a full hands-on Muffin baking class with me last Saturday.

They mix, fold and baked 3 flavours of cupcakes on their own. And they had to sample their own and their course-mates' version to give each other encouragement and review how they could improve better.

They also had to taste mine!


There was no magic in making that perfect fluffy, puffy muffin. No electric mixers or fancy equipment. Just a bowl, a wooden spatula, some measuring cups or a digital scale and a basic Convection oven!

Look at them in action..and yes, we had a Gentleman who joined us. He's awfully quiet at first. A thorn among the roses. Over time, the ladies teased him and he open up quite a bit. Overall, we all had fun. Eating muffins and sharing tips and reviews.

I taught them 3 flavours : 1 Savory which was the Cheese and Bacon Muffins, 2 sweet : Ice Cream muffins and Cranberry and Buttermilk muffins.





While waiting for the muffins to bake, we also talk about Roasting turkeys for Christmas. That's more like what I like to do for the family.Mine are all meat eaters, no bakes or pastries.

The next muffin class will probably happen in January 2010.

The Project of THE year!

The long awaited(and also long winded!) post for this year. The ultimate cake I was to bake, decorated for Ru Shin. A girl I knew since she was little girl. Watching her grew up, seeing her in all our family parties we had over the years. It was such a privilege to me that the family ask if I could bake and decorated the cake for Ru Shin's wedding.

At that time, the shop wasn't opened back then, and I didn't expect the store to take up most of my days and nights and hours. So I said "Yes" without much doubt or thought.

Ru Shin was clear about what she wanted. She envisaged how the cake will look like. But she was also worried if we could pull it off. Honestly speaking, I was a bit fearful myself. Because I have never decorated any wedding cakes for anyone. Although I have taught many to do it themselves.

She would send me photos of the cakes she saw online and thought about the flowers she wanted too. She didn't want roses which was seen in every wedding cake. She wanted something different for a change. She wanted Peonies. And it has to be pink.


Photo source : no idea. Just to show me how a peony look like. Because I have never seen a peony in real life before.

She wanted the cake to be 3 tier, covered in sugarpaste that was tinted light green so that the flowers will stand out from afar. And it must only have 6 flowers. Why six flowers? Because Ru Shin family name was "Look" and that sounded like the number six in Cantonese.

I didn't have time to make the flowers myself, so I contacted my source for gum paste flowers. This lady gave me fantastic advice on how big or small the flowers should be, based on the gap between the tiered cakes.

I send her photos of how the flowers should look like..and my gum paste flower maker did this for me:



Oh, how I prayed about this project I have. I asked God only for two things and that is Wisdom and Strength. Wisdom, so that I would know what I need to do, how I should do it. Strength so that I have the energy by the end of the year and possibly the stamina to carry through with this.

Initially, I had planned that my students come by to help me. In the end, I realised many are away for their kid's exams or travelling. So I took upon this task to do it myself.

The wedding is tomorrow, 7 November 2009. But for now, here is the cake I baked, decorated for Ru Shin. More photos to come tomorrow, after the wedding.



The guests (about 400 or so) will get a slice of the cake too. Wrapped and packed into the wedding favour boxes I have prepared.



The cake is actually a very simple cake. But Ru Shin and her family insisted that it was one that made with Love..lots of it. I had to modify an existing recipe I had used for my classes to suit their family needs of less sugar, with more plump cherries and juicy at every bite.



So I modified the recipe..here it is:

Sweet Cherries Fairy Cake
Recipe By Gina Choong

Ingredients
250g salted butter(soften in room temperature)
120g fine sugar
4 eggs(room temperature)
200g plain flour

1 can of Dark Sweet cherries(S&W brand)
400ml Cointreau(orange liquor)

Method
1. Drain cherries from the can. Put the cherries in a glass jar to soak with liquor.
2. Leave this jar in the fridge and covered. Soak for at least 7 days.
3. Drain from liquor and leave aside. Do not discard the liquor. You can add 7 Up or Sprite to it to drink.
4. Whip butter and sugar on high speed for 10 minutes.
5. Note that you must whip until the butter look very pale yellow.
6. Then lower the speed, add eggs one at a time
7. Continue to whip for 5 mins.
8. Add flour and continue to whip for 2 to 3 mins or until its evenly mixed.
9. Lastly add the cherries. Do not turn up the speed. Or the cherries will crush.
10. Pour batter into cake pans .
11. Baked in preheated oven 180C for 35 to 40 mins.
12. Leave to cool in the oven. Then removed.
13. Best to eat this after its aged for 1 day or 2.

Just to let you know how much ingredients I have used for this project:

60 pieces of SCS Salted Butter(250g)
4kg Fine sugar(yeah, that little!)
40 cans S&W Dark Sweet Cherries
20 packs of Prima Plain Flour
200 eggs
3 bottles of Cointreau liquor

A Tribute to a friend who inspired me

Today, I cried. Just found out through FaceBook and with my friend Dennis P that Chef Billy Cotton has passed away peacefully in his sleep.

Though we never met in person, we spoked often on the NET and whenever I post recipes at Chef2Chef.net forum, Billy never failed to encourage me and to inspire me. There are so many ways to love someone whom you never met, this is just one way. His way. Billy was an inspiration, to me, he was like a god father to me in all things culinary. He would encourage me, send me notes and stuff like that.

He would address me as "little girl" sometimes. In his own affectionate way, he lovingly called me "young sis". I will missed him terribly.

This is how the late Billy Cotton looked like. This photo is extracted from Facebook. The way he would have wanted all of us to know him..always in his apron, in the kitchen, whipping up and trying new recipes on the fly.



Billy was also a dog lover like me. When Beauty died, I was unconsolable for days. Billy would write to me and 'cried' with me over the NET. He would send me long and short notes every now and then to lift up my spirits.

Though we never met in person, we are like soul buddies.



Billy, dearest Brother Billy, may you rest in peace. And know that God loves you as you loved others and share unselfishly with total strangers. I will always remember you, and will inspire others like the way you have always inspired me

AMEN!

What God Has Promised

Yesterday, one of my cooking students , Miss L, visited me at the store. We talk a fair bit, of all things below the heavens. Of fun things, of food, of course. And of friends. And I was reminded of a friend I once helped who in the end, never appreciated or at least shown any to me.

I ask myself, "Is it worth it? You wanted help, and I gave it to you. Wholeheartedly, never questioning you. In the end, I get nothing. I wasn't expecting much or anything. But at least we stay as friends in this unforgiving world..but alas, you disappeared. Excuses, upon excuses.."

Miss L said to me :

"Gina, don't let this stumbling block your life. You are kind and warm hearted. Continue to bless others as that I see is what you are made of. "

And then I remembered an old hymn by Annie Johnson Flint(1866-1932) where she wrote this. Read the hymn below. And be encouraged, be inspired too.!

What God Has Promised

God has not promised
Skies always blue,
Flower-strewn pathways
All our lives thro’;
God has not promised
Sun without rain,
Joy without sorrow,
Peace without pain.

God has not promised
We shall not know
Toil and temptation,
Trouble and woe;
He has not told us
We shall not bear
Many a burden,
Many a care.

God hath not promised smooth roads and wide,
Swift, easy travel,
needing no guide;
Never a mountain,
rocky and steep,
Never a river,
turbid and deep.
But God has promised


Strength for the day,
Rest for the laborer,
Light for the way,
Grace for the trials,
Help from above,
Unfailing sympathy,
Undying love.

****
God Bless you..Miss L, you bless me today. I am blessed to have good friends, people from all walks of life walking into my life. Reminding me each day, how bless I am.

And to all out there, continue to do what God has set you up to do. Be inspired and inspired others along the way.

5 Grace Rocks!

Well, that's according to Melody. She ask me to do cupcakes, but I heard it wrongly. I heard "Cake". She wanted fondant cupcakes this time but I didn't have the time to mould each figurine for her. And with a full cake, its too heavy for her to lug it all the way from ground floor to 4th floor.

So I baked a Double Chocolate Cake and had it covered with fresh cream that was tinted purple. The cream was also flavoured with Jupe Blueberry concentrated paste. It smells and tasted really nice.






Why purple? Its her favourite colour and Blueberry was her favourite flavour too.

The rocks are chocolate pebbles. I had intention to do a 2 tier cake for her as there are 39 students in her class! But realised she may not be able to carry the cake there. So in the end, the 2nd tier cake(a smaller one) was decorated and given to my neighbours downstairs who had 4 kids. 2 are still little ones, 2 are in their late teens.

These white baby Polar bears are sugar icing from Germany. Aren't they pretty? You can get them from KC store. Its S$7.50 per set of 6 bears.




And my wish for all children today:

Happy Children's Day..enjoy your kid-hood till it lasts. :)